Shattered
by ArmedWithMyComputer
Summary: Car accident. Blood. Angst. Whumpage. Hurt/Comfort. Will the boys be able to make it through this time, against all the odds?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone :) This is my new multi-chapter fic that I've been thinking about doing for ages, and mentioned in the A/N of my last BTR one-shot! I hope you all like it…**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. I'm sorry for any mistakes, I don't have a beta :)**

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

Kendall was shaken awake by small hands that grasped his shoulders and yelled at him. He moaned, and rolled over, and pressed his head back into his soft pillow. Then, he heard his sister, Katie, groan in frustration, and start yelling louder.

"Kendall, wake up! You guys are going to be late… again!"

Sitting bolt upright in bed, Kendall rubbed his eyes wearily, and stumbled out of bed. Giving Katie a rasped thanks; he staggered over to Logan's bed to wake him up while Katie hurried to wake Carlos and James in the other room.

Within ten minutes, all four boys and Katie were hastily making toast and pouring orange juice into random glasses. By the time Carlos had finished pouring; a small lake of juice had formed on the table and was dripping down to the floor.

James looked up from where he had been buttering the toast to roll his eyes at Carlos, "Really, man? Can't you at least_ try_ and get the juice in the glasses? It's not that hard, unless you're a total idiot. I mean, Mrs. Knight has only been gone for like a day, and you're already acting like a little kid."

James was exhausted. He'd hardly gotten any sleep the night before, because of Carlos' snores, and the way the teenager had been tossing and turning all night. So, yeah, maybe he was looking for a small fight. The brunette was tired and annoyed with his roommate, even thought he knew that Carlos was not really to blame for James' lack of sleep. But the good thing about fighting with Carlos was that the small Latino could never hold a grudge for more than a few hours.

Carlos scowled, his hair messed up and eyes only half awake, "G'way, James… It's too early to care about a teeny bit of juice." Then Carlos lifted one of the glasses up to drink from it, but it slipped from his grip because of the liquid that had spilled down the side. The glass smashed down and shattered, sending the orange juice splattering everywhere. But mostly on James' favourite jacket that was draped over one of the chairs.

Everyone froze, staring at the juice covered jacket. "Carlos! You jerk!" James went to leap over the counter, and throw himself at the guilty looking teenager, but was stopped by Kendall, who dropped the bread and tried to hold James back.

"Not now, James, we have to get to the studio! Deal with Carlos after rehearsal, okay? Katie, grab James another jacket and meet us down at the car, okay?" Logan grabbed the small stack of toast, and pushed Carlos out of the apartment while Kendall wrestled James over to the elevator.

"I can't _believe_ you, Carlos! I'm not talking to you for the rest of the day, or until you apologise for ruining my lucky jacket."

"I'm not saying sorry! It was a total accident, man, and besides, just about everything that you own is 'lucky'. It wasn't my fault." Carlos pouted, and crossed his arms to match James' stance. Kendall only rolled his eyes, and clambered into the car first so he could get the backseat, forcing Carlos and James apart. Logan silently slipped into the driver's seat, and James and Carlos had a short slapping fight as to who would get the passenger seat.

James won, but only because Katie chose that moment to run out of the Palm Woods, and throw James' other jacket in his general direction. It hit Carlos in the face ("Sorry, Carlos! I didn't mean for it to hit you!"), so James took the opportunity to snag his jacket and dart around Carlos to the front seat.

Still running late, Logan quickly started the car and sped out of the Palm Woods car park, once Carlos had sulkily got in the back. The first half of the journey was in silence, Carlos and James still not talking to each other, making the atmosphere in the car tense and awkward.

Then, Carlos accidently flicked the rubber band that he had found on the floor and had been messing with, in James' direction. Just as Carlos was opening his mouth to apologise, James turned around and glared, "What is your problem, Carlos! You're so immature, and it's really annoying! Give it a rest, man!" Kendall groaned in frustration as Carlos started to yell back, and then James was arguing over him, and suddenly Logan got involved in the fight to try and break up the constant flow of verbal abuse.

Kendall jumped into the argument, yelling at the top of his voice to try and be heard, but by then no one could hear anyone else. If an outsider had looked into the smallish car crammed with teenage boys, they would have seen hands flailing, a rubber band being flung back and forth with force, and anger or annoyance in all four of the boys' expressions.

"Sometimes I hate you, Carlos!" James screamed, just as everyone else paused to draw in a breath. Carlos stopped in his loud rant about how annoying James was, stunned into silence. He never thought that he'd hear one of his best friends say that he hated him.

Shocked tears welled up in the Latino's eyes, more out of disbelief and surprise than anything. He turned away from James' frozen face, the brunette couldn't believe that those words had actually burst out either, and pressed his forehead to the window. Carlos flinched away from Kendall's hand that went to touch his shoulder.

Logan, unsure of what was going on, twisted around in his seat to glance at Carlos who was sitting directly behind him. "Carlos? Are you oka—"

"Logan, watch out!"

Kendall was the only one who saw the huge black SUV breaking the lights and heading straight for Carlos and Logan's side of the car. Carlos' brown eyes snapped open in fear, just in time to feel the bone-shattering impact, and see the glass splintering in all directions. All four boys were screaming, but then a second disaster happened, before the car got a chance to stop spinning.

A truck, unable to stop when he saw the SUV smash into the side of the friends' car because he was going too fast, slammed into the back of the car. Carlos and Kendall were jolted forward, and both cracked their heads against the headrests, the two friends in the backseat instantly rendered unconscious. After a few terrifying moments, the car stopped spinning, and jolted to a halt.

Then there was silence.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**What did you guys think? I'll post the next chapter on either Saturday or Sunday if I get a good response :) I hope you liked it… Review?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys! First off: Wow. I'm still in total shock by the amazing response to this story :0 I decided to post this chapter a day earlier because all the reviews were so nice and amazing, and I'm so grateful! I'm pretty sure that I replied to all you guys who were logged in, but I'll list all you awesome people just in case I missed someone : **MyHeroRaven, emmyloser, loveshj, BSB plus BTR equals HEAVEN, I C a big world, Kelly, cookielover101, SchmidtSwagBTR, FreakierThanFreaks, vikwhis13, freakycutiecarlos, PizzaTop21, Too lazy to log in, Uttermost, squoctobird, **and the two people who didn't leave a name :D You guys all made my day!**

**Thanks so much for the bunch of alerts and favourites too :) It's great to know that people are interested in this!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes :P**

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

James was confused. One second he had been feeling terribly guilty about arguing with Carlos over nothing, and then the next… The car had been spiralling out of control, and Logan was yelling, and Carlos was screaming in pain, and Kendall was moving around desperately, and then there was silence.

James opened his eyes from where they had been squeezed shut, and looked around. The first person that he saw was Logan, slumped against the wheel, a small cut over his eyebrow dripping blood down his face. "Logan…? Logan? Wake up, man… What happened?" But Logan didn't move. He stayed motionless, arms slack by his sides.

Suddenly unable to say anything else because of the lump in his throat, James twisted around to look into the backseat. Kendall was sprawled across the backseat, his eyes closed and body still. The whole rear window of the car was broken, shards of glass all over Kendall and on the floor. James couldn't see any blood though, so that had to be a good thing.

But then his eyes slid over to Carlos, and he wished that he'd never looked. Carlos was slouched in the same position that he had been in when James had been yelling at him, except the window he had been looking out was completely shattered, and Carlos' face was covered in blood. James came to the horrifying conclusion that the window had shattered right in Carlos' face, and… there was just so much blood. Carlos' door also looked like it had caved in, angling his limp body awkwardly. Carlos wasn't moving.

He looked dead.

None of James' friends looked like they were alive and breathing.

"C-Carlos? Kendall? Logan?" James was breathing hard; unable to inhale enough oxygen to stop hyperventilating, but he forced himself to keep talking, "Guys…? Anybody? _Help_! Help, someone, I need help!"

It was only when a light flashed into the car, and voices were yelling at him that James paid attention to what was happening outside of the car. Sirens were blaring, and people were shouting, and the sounds of crying were filtering through. Then a random guy, dressed like a paramedic, appeared outside James' window, and was speaking to him. James felt like he was about to pass out and throw up at the same time, but he tried to listen.

"… kid? Can you hear me? Blink twice if you can hear my voice, okay?" James' eyelashes fluttered closed twice, "Good, that's good, man. Okay, are you hurt anywhere? I need you to tell me what hurts, yeah? You're going to be okay, just try and keep calm for me."

Then James became aware of his own pains, and realised that everything hurt. His eye felt like it was swollen, his chest throbbed with pain, and his whole body felt like one big bruise. But he wasn't seriously hurt, at least he didn't think, not like his friends.

"M-my friends… Blood… H-help my friends f-first," James managed to choke out, around the lump in his throat that just kept getting bigger.

"It's okay, it's okay, just breathe for me. We need to concentrate on you right now, okay? There are people working right now to get your buddies out." James snapped his head over to look at his friends, and was surprised to see that there were in fact people cutting open the doors, and getting backboards ready. Then James couldn't tear his gaze away, unable to turn back to the paramedic.

Logan was extracted from the wreck first, before James could say anything. He panicked, yelling after the backboard that was being carried quickly away, "Wait! Is he going to be okay? _Logan_!"

But then the paramedic beside James who had been easing open the door quietly spoke up. Or maybe he had never stopped speaking, just James had stopped listening. "Just calm down, kid, okay? They're taking him to the hospital, where they're gonna take care of him. Now, turn back to me, and just calm down, okay?"

At the sight of a bloody Carlos being manhandled gently out of the car, his limp fingers trailing blood along the car as he was eased out, James lost it. He started to thrash around, desperate to get out of the car and run after his friends, "No! It's not okay, and I'm not going to calm down! My friends could be _dying_ for all I know, and I'm stuck here in this fucking car. Get me out, get me out now! I need out!"

In his panic, James missed what could have been his last glimpse of Kendall being carted off to the ambulance. When he flung his head back to check on him, Kendall was gone. "Kendall! Where is he? Who took him? _Kendall_! Please, someone, get me out of here!"

Then James' door was wrenched off its hinges, and hands were suddenly all over him, unbuckling the seatbelt, holding his head still (which he resisted against, but was too weak), and feeling up and down his arms and legs to make sure that he wasn't injured. James screamed and cried, bucking with all his strength against the backboard that he was forced onto, straining all his muscles to free himself as he was strapped down.

All he could see was the blue sky on the way to the ambulance, though he couldn't care less about the fluffy clouds (_Carlos would have loved them – If he was conscious…_), too busy fighting the hands that were attempting to help him. James' panicked and scared mind was in overdrive, and he fought the paramedics every time someone tried to adjust the straps or check his pulse.

"He's going into shock."

Finally, just when he was about to pass out from the effort of fighting, that same paramedic that had been there from the beginning appeared in his line of vision, "Hey, kid, you have to calm down, okay? We're going to have to give you something to relax you in a minute, because we need to work on you." In response, James only strained harder, all the muscles in his body trying at their maximum to break free, "I'm sorry that it had to come to this, buddy, but it's for your own good. Now, you're going to feel a small prick…"

Then there was a sharp pain in his elbow, and James knew that they'd injected something into him. He tried to keep resisting the hands and to turn away from the bright lights that they were now shining in his eyes, but he couldn't. The whole world was melting away, and James was too weak to resist it.

Just as he felt something cover his mouth and nose, James' eyes slipped closed, and he was gone.

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.**

**So, how did you guys like that chapter? I'm sorry if James seemed kinda OOC, just I wanted to have some panicky James to kick-start things, but I'll make sure that each character gets their share of angst :) **

**Review…? I'll post the next chapter on Wednesday if I get a good response… or maybe a day earlier if people want :) Feedback is greatly appreciated!**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer x**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys :) Thanks so much for all your amazing reviews, I loved them all :) Thanks a bunch to you all : **coolchick275, I C a big world, Anonymous Skrtle, PizzaTop21, loveshj, freakycutiecarlos, happygirl57, BSB plus BTR equals HEAVEN, MyHeroRaven, cookielover101, emmyloser, tank602, AlliJay21, jaydenlover17, Glee Clue Rock 1251, vikwhis13, Baxxie, c, FreakierThanFreaks, tanyaforever9, CheekyBrunette, **and **Jug **:D**

**Im so sorry if this chapter isn't the best, guys! It's just that it's my first few days back at school, and everything is kinds crazy :0 Also, I'm not sure if I wrote Katie's POV right, so let me know ways that I can improve!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Katie Knight rolled her eyes and sighed as she started to wipe up the orange juice that Carlos had spilled all over the table. She then turned to the kitchen counter, brushing all the crumbs from the toast that Logan and Kendall had been in charge of, and sprinkled the crumbs into the bin.

Deciding to leave the rest of the mess for later, the boys could clear at least some of it up; she threw herself onto the couch with a smile, switching on the TV.

She sat in tired silence for half an hour, ignoring the clothes that were draped over furniture, sneakers tossed in corners, and the general messiness that came from four teenage boys that have been left without supervision. Just as Katie was drifting off to sleep, it was only half seven in the morning, the phone rang. The sound of the shrill ring jolted Katie out of her daze, and she yawned slightly, before picking the phone up.

"Hello…?" Katie held back another yawn, stumbling over to the table to grab a forgotten glass of orange juice.

"Is Mrs. Knight there? I understand that she is the legal guardian for Kendall Knight, Logan Mitchell, James Diamond, and Carlos Garcia while they are in LA? It's urgent that I speak to her as soon as possible." The voice on the phone was calm and neutral, but Katie felt something click in her mind.

"W-who am I speaking to?"

"This is Marie McCall, one of the nurses from LA general hospital. Who is this? Can I please speak to Mrs. Knight?" The woman on the phone could clearly hear Katie's fear and youth, and softened her voice.

"This is, um, Katie Knight, Kendall's sister. Our mom left two days ago to go to a high school reunion in Minnesota, and won't be back for another week. She left K-Kendall in charge… What happened? Are they okay?"

"The four boys were in a car accident around half an hour ago, and were just brought into LA General Hospital. I'm afraid that I can't give you any more information over the phone, but if you make your way to the hospital, than the doctors will speak more with you. Do you have a contact number for your mom, sweetie?" There was a crash on the other side of the line as Katie's fingers froze, and the glass of orange juice dropped to the floor. Her lips felt numb, and she swayed on her feet. "Katie, what was that? Katie, honey, are you okay?"

"I— I… Oh my God. Is Kendall— Are they all okay? I mean, how bad was the crash? But – Oh my God… I need to get there. Now. I— Just—I don't understand, Logan's like the most careful driver I know and…" Her mind was spinning, and the room seemed to be tilting. A puddle of juice and pieces of shattered glass covered the floor at Katie's feet.

"Katie? Katie, I need you to calm down. The doctors are working on your brother and his friends right now, okay? How soon can you get to the hospital? Would you be able to call a cab maybe, so that I can talk to you in person, and explain how things are going to work?"

The young girl's mind raced, and she blinked rapidly before coming up to a solution, "I-I know how to get there… I'll be there in, um, ten minutes. I— Can you—Can you tell my brother Kendall that I love him…?"

Tears gathered in the nurse's eyes as she looked down at Kendall Knight's file, and thought of the little girl on the other end of the line who was racing to see her brother. It always seemed like a whole different ball-game when patients had younger siblings who relied on them. "Of course, sweetie. You just get here as fast as you can, and I'll talk to you when you get here, okay?"

But the only response that she got was the sound of a dial tone, Katie already sprinting out the door. She shoved people aside, and didn't look up from the ground until she reached the Palm Woods Park. "Tyler! Tyler, I need to borrow your bike, it's an emergency!" The words caught in throat, and she looked away from Tyler's curious eyes before he could see the tears that were about to fall.

Tyler frowned, confused, but he handed over his bike to a trembling Katie. "Hey, Katie, are you okay? Where are you going? Can I help you with whatever your about to do? Katie!"

But Katie was already cycling away, her legs working as fast as they could. The first tear of many to come dripped down her cheek just as she turned onto the main road.

Ten minutes later, Tyler's bike was lying forgotten on the sidewalk outside the hospital, and Katie was bursting though the ER doors. "My brother, has anyone seen my brother!" She cried desperately, her wide eyes scanning the various beds and gurneys for Kendall. "His— His name is K-Kendall Knight, and he my— my big brother, and he's hurt, and—and I don't know anything!" Katie was bordering on hysterical, tears streaming down her face as she screamed her brother's name, along with the other three boys. "Kendall! K-Kendall, where are you? Logan? James? Carlos?"

Her world was falling apart, and she had never felt more alone. She had always thought of Kendall's three friends as her brothers, and now… Katie had no idea what was going on, or what had even really happened. All that she was aware of was the sound of her heart pounding a terrified beat in her chest, and the crushing sound of silence as she pleaded for someone to answer her.

Just as she was about to sink to her knees, everyone's confused and worried eyes on her, a nurse appeared, taking Katie's face in her hands and talking slowly, "Katie? Are you Katie Knight, sweetie?" Her head nodded jerkily, more of a spasm from her sobbing than anything, "Okay, honey, okay. Come with me, over this way…"

Hangs grasped Katie's shoulders, and guided her up off the floor, and towards the big set of double doors at the other end of the ER.

On the way to the waiting room, dozens of gurneys were pushed past, barely audible moans of pain heard. Katie scanned each one in case it was one of the boys. She was afraid of what it would be like if it was one of the boys, terrified because everyone just looked so _broken_, and it scared her to death when she saw the bloodstains and saw their pained expressions. But each time it wasn't, and she was half relieved and half terrified. Until it was.

Katie froze, staring at the still figure on the gurney that was rushing past."Wait!" She stumbled forward, grabbing the rails of bed, begging for the orderlies to stop.

They did so, confused but sympathetic expressions plastered all over their faces, and waited while she looked down into his slack, unconscious face. He didn't move, not even when she screamed his name over and over.

His hair was messed up, like it was when he fell out of bed in the morning, and it just looked so wrong. Everything about the last hour, since she'd gotten the phone call, had just been so surreal and wrong. Katie half thought that this was some sort of reality TV show. But the body on the bed was too still, the red stains too visible, and the pain too overwhelming.

Four of the most important people in Katie's life were slipping away, and she wasn't sure if she could pull everyone back to normality. If normal even existed any more.

She was finally pulled away, strong and unknown arms wrapping around her torso and breaking her grip on the gurney. "No! No, you can't take him away; he's the only one that I know is alive! Please— Please let me come with you… I need to." But still she was ripped away from the one connection that she had with the boys, and was folded into the stranger's arms.

She kept whispering his name as she was lowered down into a chair, as if saying it again and again could make him okay.

"Oh God, Logan… I—Logan…_ Logan_."

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**Was that okay…? I'm hoping to get the next chapter up on maybe Friday, so let me know if you liked this one :) The more feedback I get, the more motivated I get, and… the faster the updates!**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey everyone :) Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed, and I'm so sorry that I didn't have enough time to reply to each of you guys who were logged in! Sorry! Thanks a bunch to everyone: **emmyloser, happygirl21, Carla, tank602, MyHeroRaven, cookchick275, cookielover101, BTRCaitlin, Glee Club Rock 1251, vikwhis13, loveshj, PizzaTop21, BSB plus BTR equals HEAVEN, wingedgymnast12, Anonymous Skrtle, FreakierThanFreaks, freakycutiecarlos, **and** Twisted Illusions **:D** **You guys made me smile so much!**

**I'm glad that people liked the last chapter, and felt that it was realistic… I've never been in this kind of situation personally, so I'm just trying my best to get across the horribleness of this kind of situation. Also, I love hurting those boys :0 … Yes, I have a problem. ;)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush, or **_**Over My Head**_**, by the Fray (awesome song – story of my life!). **

**Hope you guys like this!**

**O.o. O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

_I'd rather run the other way than stay and see,  
>The smoke and who's still standing when it clears – Over My Head (Cable Car), The Fray.<em>

Katie screamed and cried and yelled and fought against whoever was holding her. She knew that it definitely wasn't the nurse, who smelled like antiseptic and cookies, because she could see the woman out of the corner of her eye, one hand over her mouth in an expression of extreme pity.

The person that was gripping her tightly smelled like blood, sweat, and Cuda hair spray. His arms were strong and muscled, and Katie recognised the colour of the fabric under her fingers. It was the exact same as the jacket that she had given James that morning as a replacement for his other ruined one. The person was also crying, but managed to hold her tightly as his body shook.

"Oh, God, James…" Katie choked out as she stopped resisting and went limp in James' embrace. "A-are you okay?"

She pulled away from the brunette for a moment, to check that it really was James that was hugging her. It was, and he terrible. His hair was messed up, a rare occurrence for James, his jacket dirty and ripped, a dark bruise already forming on his cheek that extended to his jaw line. His right eye was showing signs of bruising, and Katie knew that he was going to have one hell of a shiner, and James also had some small scrapes all along his neck. James was shaking, his eyes full of pain and looking tortured, and his hands held tightly to Katie's as he started speaking.

"I-I'm fine, Katie. Nothing but bruises for me… But the others— Oh God, Katie, it was awful. One second we were all arguing, and then suddenly the car was out of control and we just kept getting hit, over and over. And—And then, they were all unconscious, and the blood, and—"

He broke down into desperate sobs, grateful when Katie pulled him into another strong hug. James hadn't even told her about waking up in the hospital, fuzzy and still half sedated, only to find that he couldn't see any of his friends. The doctors had cleared him as being fine, apart from some deep bruises that should be okay, saying that he was lucky, very lucky, but it didn't seem that way.

Dark blue bruises splattered across his ribs and torso, a result of him jolting forward and hitting the dashboard before crashing back in his seat. It hurt to move, and James was pretty sure that the doctor had just been about to give him some pain medication before he had bolted. But he knew that whatever pain he was feeling, his friends were feeling it times twenty.

He'd half fell off the bed in the ER trauma bay; practically fell out the door in his haste to find someone, _anyone,_ that he knew. Then he had stumbled into the corridor to find Katie, crying and pleading for Logan to wake up.

Half carrying Katie over to the nearby waiting room, James then collapsed on the uncomfortable couch in the corner, Katie curled against him. His mind kept replaying those awful few seconds between him shouting at Carlos ("_Sometimes I hate you, Carlos_!"), to him looking around to see all of his friends unconscious.

Now though, James was at a complete loss at what to do.

Katie was still sobbing into his shirt, his body ached, and the other people in the waiting room looked on in pity. It was never like this on TV, because you could be pretty certain that all the brightly coloured characters would be okay, and that life for them would continue as normal. But in real life, the hospital walls started to close in, it became hard to breathe from underneath the worry, pain – both physical and mental – seemed to be everywhere and everything, the sounds of crying breaking past the barriers and crushing you inside. James was pretty sure that it never hurt this much on TV.

James didn't know if he could do it. He wanted to jump up, screaming, and run back to that morning, when everything had been okay. He wanted to let all of his anger and uncertainty out in one long scream, to swing out with his fists at anyone or everyone, to feel okay again. He wanted to break down crying and cursing at the same time, and crawl away into a ball and never come out.

But he didn't.

Instead, James held Katie close, stroking her hair and whispering comforting words, telling her softly that everything would be okay. But it wasn't. How could anything ever be okay again, after this? He filled out the paperwork that a nurse dumped on the small coffee table in front of him, as much of it that he knew, and then explained to another nurse why Mrs. Knight couldn't be contact, while Katie cried behind him.

"She's in Minnesota at the moment, at a high school reunion, and her phone is broken because C-Carlos accidently smashed it through the window instead of the hockey puck that was beside it, and it fell into the pool. And then I broke her spare mobile like five minutes before she left for the airport, 'cause I was aiming for Logan, but hit the phone with the can of hairspray, and it fell on the ground and smashed…"

The explanations went on forever, with James then stressing to the nurse about how Carlos was allergic to a certain type of painkiller, how Logan would want to see their medical files the second he woke up, and that Kendall always wanted his beanie if he was hurt or sick.

The lists went on and on, James unable to stop once he started, but he was cut off in the middle of explaining Carlos' connection to his helmet that was left back in the apartment by the nurse, explaining that she had work to do. He watched her walk briskly back to the nurses' station, before turning around to hug Katie again.

Every half hour, James would rush anxiously up to the nurses' station, and beg and plead for any information about his friends, tears slipping down everytime he was told that the doctors were still working, and that he would get an update whenever the information was available. The only things that he was told was that Carlos was in surgery, and that Logan was stable for now.

Katie dissolved into tears once more when she heard that no news had come about her brother.

Two hours since James had found Katie, and there was still no news, except for the frightening and relieving pieces of information about Carlos and Logan. Katie's seemingly non-stop tears had seemed to dry out after the hour and a half mark, leaving her staring blankly at the floor while James still tried to make sense of everything. Nothing seemed to make sense to him anymore.

Yet another thirty minutes passed, and James wearily stood and made his way to the nurses' station to check for an update. Still nothing. He was pointed towards the nearest bathrooms, and told that he "… might want to freshen up, you look like a ghost…" Informing Katie gently about where he was going, James staggered into the bathrooms.

Hands clenched tightly around the sink, he slowly looked up to meet his reflection. His eye was ringed with black, dark circles under both his eyes, bruises standing out on his face in contrast against his pale skin.

James hair was messy and dirty and couldn't look more different to how it had looked before he had left the apartment. He didn't care though. Splashing some water on his face to get rid of the dirt and dried blood, James sighed deeply, face cradled in his hands. Everything had gone so wrong in so little time.

Then James Diamond began to sob.

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.**

**Yeah… More James angst in this chapter! I promise to include info about the other boys in the next chapter (suspense!)… Hopefully I'll get the next chapter up by maybe Tuesday or Wednesday, so some feedback would be awesome :) **

**All your reviews absolutely make my whole day, and put a huge smile on my face everytime, so I'd love to hear from you guys about this chapter!**

**Thanks so much for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey guys :) I'm posting this tonight 'cause I've been having a crazy boring day, and won't be able to tomorrow because I'm getting the results of some really important exams, and will (hopefully!) be out celebrating this time tomorrow :D**

**Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed! You guys are all amazing: **MyHeroRaven, Twisted Illusions, loveshj, georgia1997, Wingedgymnast12, happygirl57, cookielover101, vikwhis13, PizzaTop21, Anonymous Skrtle, coolchick275, BSB plus BTR equals HEAVEN, AlliJay21, freakycutiecarlos, Glee Club Rock1251, FreakierThanFreaks, xEryChan, **and **Boots'N'Opals **:D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. ****Also, I'm not a doctor or anything medically related at all, so all the boys' injuries are just what I could think up! Sorry for any mistakes :)**

**I hope you guys like this chapter :)**

**O.o. O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

James let himself cry openly without holding back for three minutes, one for each of his friends, before hiccupping his way to a stop, and wiping his eyes. When he looked in the mirror of the hospital bathroom again, he was (somewhat) calm on the outside, and it wasn't that clear that he'd just been sobbing. James needed to be strong for Katie, Carlos, Kendall, and Logan. He needed to keep it together for himself.

When he walked back into the waiting room once again, bracing himself for another few hours of torturous waiting, he was immediately met by Katie throwing herself into his arms again. She was crying again. Standing next to the spot where Katie had been was a doctor.

All the self control that James thought that he had crumbled and left him frozen in place, his emotions splashed over his face. He couldn't do this.

"James?" The man said softly, a clipboard in his hands, "Would you come with me please?" James _really_ couldn't do this. But somehow he managed to nod, holding Katie close, before following the doctor out of the waiting room.

"I—Are they okay?" He blurted out the second the waiting room door closed behind them. Katie tightened her grip on him.

The doctor turned to look at him for a second, sympathy evident in his expression, before saying briskly, "I'm not sure that we should discuss this in the corridor, James. I'll explain everything once we're in my office, okay?" It wasn't okay, not at all. James needed to know, and he needed to know now. But then the doctor was walking fast, and it was all that James could do to follow him, Katie's head buried in his shoulder.

The second that they were sitting behind the doctor's desk, Katie uncurled herself, and whispered, "Is K-Kendall okay?"

"Well, Katie, is it?" James nodded for her, "Your brother sustained some serious head trauma when his head hit off the front of the seat with the force of the impact. There was some swelling of the brain, but no bleeding showed up during his scans." Katie had stopped breathing, "He—Well, Kendall is as stable as we can get him with this kind of injury, but we're not sure when he'll regain consciousness. It's a waiting game from here on. But he's young and healthy, so we're hoping that he'll wake up as soon as possible. But, yes, he is okay for now."

James remembered Kendall's desperate and irrational struggle to get out of the car before the crash, and figured that he must have undone his seatbelt in a frenzied panic. It explained why Kendall had been sprawled across the backseat.

Katie was whimpering, turning back to James and longing for the comfort of his arms around her. He seemed to know just what she needed, and enclosed her in his strong arms, arms that she could nearly pretend were Kendall's if she closed her eyes and tried hard enough.

"What about our other friends?"

"Logan and Carlos? Let's see…" The man flipped through the various charts for a few minutes, his eyes scanning the pages, "Logan came in unconscious, having sustained a hard knock to his head, as well as a broken arm. He's going to be fine, apart from a concussion that we're monitoring closely. He also has some mild cuts and bruises, but nothing too serious."

James breathed a sigh of relief, unable to speak while the news sank in. Logan was okay. But— "What about Carlos?" Katie voiced her concerns just as James was opening his mouth, voice muffled from her position curled up to James.

"Carlos… Well, it seems that the window shattered in front of him, leaving him with deep lacerations on his face and neck. The first car that hit Carlos and Logan's side caved in the rear and side of the car, so he had some broken ribs on his left side, as well as a fractured femur, he had surgery to realign the bone, because of the position that he was in during the crash." James had a flashback to Carlos curling into himself after he had shouted those hurtful words. "He is also unconscious at the moment, due to the force at which his head hit the headrest after the truck collided with the back of the car, but when he wakes up he will be in quite a bit of pain."

James wished that the doctor would just stop talking.

Katie didn't have to know the exact details of what happened. It just made her sob harder, picturing the awful scene that they'd left behind, imagining the three teenagers and bloody in the car.

"And how are you, Mr. Diamond?" James was jerked out of his thoughts and the never ending memories of looking around the car after the crash, and stared in confusion at the doctor. "It says here that you have extensive bruising of your torso, and left the ER before any pain medication could be administered."

Katie immediately loosened her tight hold, and regarded James with worry, "What? No, I'm fine. Barely noticed it." He pulled Katie close again, murmuring to her that she hadn't hurt him, even though his chest ached, "Can we see them?"

Giving James a slightly disbelieving glance, the doctor didn't push the matter any further, and agreed to let them see Logan for a short period of time. On the way to Logan's room, James tried once again to pull himself together for his injured friend, but was still hopelessly filled with fear and panic when they arrived outside the door.

"Just to warn you, he might be a bit mixed up, but that's perfectly normal for anyone with a concussion."

And then the door was opening, and James' legs were moving out of their own accord. He couldn't do this. The sight of Logan half sitting up in the hospital bed, attached to an IV, with a few butterfly bandages holding together the cut over his eye. A bulky white cast encased his left arm, from elbow to fingers.

"J-James…? Katie?" James' legs stopped working, and he stayed frozen in the doorway while Katie walked hesitantly over to the bed. "What happened?"

"There was an, um, accident, Logan. But you're okay, you're gonna be fine." Katie reached over and gently hugged the teenager.

Logan looked confused, "But, what day is it?" Katie answered him, telling Logan that it was Wednesday, "But… We have rehearsals on Wednesdays. So how…?" He gazed at James, a look of utter bewilderment on his face. Katie silently pleaded for him to come closer.

"We got in a car crash on our way to the studio, buddy…" James inched closer. "Kendall and Carlos are in hospital too, but the doctors think that they're going to be okay too. How do you feel?"

Logan frowned, as if contemplating the situation, before looking up, "My head hurts. And my arm. What happened?" Katie and James exchanged a worried glance.

"There was an accident, Logan, remember?"

"What day is it? Aren't we supposed to be at the studio? Gustavo will be mad, James…" To be honest, James hadn't even spared a thought to Gustavo or Kelly, and what they might think when the boys never showed up to the studio. He assumed that someone would explain what had happened to them, because he really didn't have the strength to do it.

"It's Wednesday, Logan, and don't worry about Gustavo. Everything's gonna be fine."

"Where are Carlos and Kendall, because—" Logan suddenly stopped speaking. His face scrunched up, and then he barked out a hoarse laugh. James had no idea what was going on with his friend.

"Uh, Logan? You okay, man?"

"Kendall." Logan said simply, smiling goofily. James raised an eyebrow. "It sounds like Ken-doll. Like a Barbie." He chuckled again, "And then Jo could be Barbie! Barbie and Ken-Doll." He grinned. James rolled his eyes, and half smiled at Logan's terrible joke. Katie face-palmed, but James could see that she was smiling. Logan's goofiness that was just so unlike him made the situation a fraction less horrible.

"Yeah, Logan. I'll let you tell Kendall that when he—" James faltered, "When he wakes up, okay?" James squeezed Kendall's sister's hand tightly.

"Wait, what day is it?"

"We really need a video camera for moments like this, huh, Katie?" James joked, trying to lift the atmosphere slightly. It kinda worked, with Logan grinning goofily, Katie giggling quietly at the statements that Logan came out with, and James feeling some of his worry for Logan melt away.

Until the doctor walked in.

**O.o. O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

**Lol, hopefully that wasn't too horrible! The only things that I really know about concussions come from when my uncle had a really bad one – all he could ask for about a day was **_**"what happened?"**_** and **_**"what day is it?"**_** Sooo… apologies if that seemed kinda weird! I just wanted to have some concussed/really confused Logan :)**

**I'm thinking maybe the next chapter up by… Friday? I'd love to hear what you thought of this one though :) Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey everyone :) I hope you guys had a good week… Thank God it's Friday! **

**Thanks so much for all the reviews! I'm so blown away by the amazing response that this story has gotten :) Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter: **Baxxie, vikwhis13, witnessgreatness21, coolchick275, MyHeroRaven, happygirl57, CandySmile, MSUbtrfan, Glee Club Rock 1251, Anonymous Skrtle, cookielover101, PizzaTop21, SweetPeaKiller, I C a big world, FreakierThanFreaks, Wingedgymnast21, pinkranger888, HonoraryLoser, Twisted Illusions, BTR'slovesong, freakycutiecarlos… **:D Thanks so much guys!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

James leapt out of his chair when the doctor knocked once on the door before barging into Logan's room. _Oh God, no. _

"What's wrong?" He gasped, feeling that sick feeling in his stomach come slamming back. "What happened?" Visions of blood and tears and panic and arguing and that crushed car and the flashing lights and sirens and just about everything about that morning flash into his mind. James' mind is racing.

"What? Oh, don't worry, James, nothing is wrong. I was just coming in to tell you both that visiting times are over, Logan needs to rest, and to see if you both wanted a short visit with Carlos and Kendall? Carlos seems to be regaining consciousness, so it might be good for him to see some familiar faces."

Katie seemed to freeze for a second when James turned back to check that she was still okay, but she snaps out of it. Leaning down, Katie gives Logan another small hug, saying, "We'll come back to see you later, Logan, okay? Right now though we're gonna go and check on Carlos and Kendall…" Logan only looks confused, and asks her what happened.

James tries to crack a smile for his friend, saying his goodbyes, before turning to the doctor. "Let's go." He and Katie join hands.

Katie has once again sandwiched herself against James as they approach the ICU. James has to force himself not to look in all the rooms that they pass, the large windows outside too morbidly tempting. But then he's reminded that Carlos and Kendall are somewhere in these rooms, and he's afraid of seeing his friends, for fear of what they'll look like.

He keeps his eyes glued to the floor after that.

When the doctor stops in front of one of the doors, and gestures for James and Katie to go in before him, James pales. He's not ready for this, isn't prepared to see his broken best friend, doesn't want to accept the fact that Carlos is in pain and hurt.

But he's nudged into the room by the doctor, and James catches a glimpse of Carlos before he can stop himself. His mind races into overdrive immediately – This is way worse than seeing Logan, 'cause at least Logan had looked like himself – and only Katie's small hand squeezing his can stop him in what was becoming a panic attack.

The Latino is flat on his back, whimpering. A cast had already been put on his leg, the plaster stretching from Carlos' hip all the way down to his toes. His chest is securely wrapped, for the broken ribs James realises with a start, and there are deep, ugly bruises all the way up his left arm.

Then James looks at his friend's face, and thinks that there is a very good chance that he might throw up.

Carlos' tanned face is clean of blood, but the deep cuts have been stitched, making him look even worse. Because now James can see clearly all of the damage, could trace his finger over all of the lacerations if he wanted to, can see perfectly where the glass sliced into Carlos. It's horrific.

To the left of the bed, James can see some sort of metal contraption that makes him shiver, and he suddenly realises that the doctor is in the middle of explaining everything, "… used for traction. It looks bad, but Carlos wasn't conscious for it, so it didn't hurt him. As for his face, those cuts should hopefully heal completely, and we're hoping that the scarring will be minimal.

"He had surgery for his broken femur, where the surgeons realigned the bone, and casted him under anaesthetic. While it is normal procedure to fit younger children with a spica cast, we decided to just give Carlos a full length cast, to give him better mobility. Provided that he does nothing too strenuous, the bone should heal perfectly with time."

Katie manages to unstick herself from James' side when he moves towards the bed, and into Carlos' line of vision. "Hey, buddy…" He chokes out, because Carlos just looks so _broken_. He also has his big puppy dog eyes turned on full, making him seem even more vulnerable, and his face is scrunched up between two different expressions: guilt, and pain.

The teenager shifts slightly in the bed, letting out a gasp of pain when agony flares. "Hey, don't try to move, okay? Everything's okay, I promise. Just—Try and stay still."

Carlos obeys and stops moving, tears spilling down his cheeks, "W-What… Happened…." The words are hoarse, cracked, and full of pain, but James is just relieved that Carlos is lucid, unlike Logan that's off in a complete other world.

It's obvious that it's hurting the teenager to speak, his breaths coming out hard and strained, but there's a familiar stubborn glint in Carlos' eyes that James knows well.

"There was, um, we got into a car crash, man. You—you broke your leg, and some ribs, but the doctors said that you're going to be fine."

"Hurts…" James winces, and gently picks up Carlos' hand, a tear escaping from his own eyes, "T-the… others?"

James blanks, not knowing what to say, "I-I… We just saw Logan, and um, well he's got a concussion. Doesn't really know what's going on, but he's fine. It's actually pretty funny, you'd like it. Oh, and he broke his arm, but it's not serious. And Kendall… Well, we haven't seen him yet, he still has to wake up, but he's okay too." The last part is a lie, James has no idea if Kendall is okay or not, but he figures that the last thing that Carlos needs is to be upset.

Carlos frowns, hissing in pain when he pulls some of his stitches in his forehead, "Y-you okay?" Then James completely forgets how to breathe, and almost chokes. Of all the people he knew, only Carlos would be concerned for him, a total jerk, when he's lying in a hospital bed, practically crying in pain. _Oh Jeez…_

Katie quickly steps in, catching James' desperate glance backwards, and is suddenly beside him. She slips her hand in his, and squeezes it tight for support, "He's fine, Carlos, don't worry."

The Latino smiles painfully at the sight of Katie, "Heya… Katie." He croaks, clearly trying to hide some of his pain and sound normal. It didn't work.

"Hey, Carlos," Tears shine in her eyes, but she refuses to let them fall. "You feeling okay?" Carlos winks cheerfully in response, talking too painful on his broken ribs, but his eyes lack the normally ever present sparkle that makes Carlos _Carlos_. Katie has to swallow hard before she can continue speaking, "You want me to bring your helmet in when I go home next?" It's a weak attempt at conversation, but it has Carlos looking overjoyed in a second.

"That w-would… be awe—awesome…" His words are becoming more and more slurred, and harder to get out, so it's then that the doctor steps in.

"I think that it's time for Carlos to get some stronger pain meds. They will make him very drowsy, so you'll probably drift off to sleep, Carlos…" Before the Latino can object, a syringe is being placed in his IV stand, and a second later his face starts to relax.

"W-wait… J-Jamzzz…" Carlos looks like he's concentrating hard to keep his eyes open, let alone talk, so James leans down to listen, "You… don't sssstill…. H-hate… me, do… youuu…? 'mm sorry…" Then he trails off, eyes slightly glazed over.

"What? No! No, Carlos, I didn't mean it when I said that, no! Oh God, man, I'm so sorry, I swear that I didn't mean it at all… Please don't think that because it's not true at all, and I—" But then James is nudged slightly, and he realises that Carlos has fallen asleep already. James is shaking, trying to hold it together for Katie, but it's nearly impossible.

Somehow he manages to stop the tears.

The doctor checks a few reading on the machines, does some weird doctor stuff with the IVs, before straightening from where he had been bent over Carlos, "Do you both want to see Kendall now?"

But James realises that he really doesn't want to see Kendall. As bad as it sounds, he's terrified of the unknown after seeing two of his friends injured and broken, and he's not sure that he can face a third. Especially since it's Kendall, the leader and the one who holds everything together.

James is trying his best, but he _really _doesn't think that he can do this.

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.**

**So, I hope that this chapter is okay! The future of this story holds angst and whumpage for all :) If there's anything that you want to see in this, drop me a line, and I'll try my very best to fit it in :D**

**The next chapter should be up by Monday, I'm thinking…? I'd love to hear what you thought about this chapter :) Review…?**

**Thanks so much for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys :) Happy Monday! Lol, Mondays suck… So I decided to post the next chapter today to cheer myself up!**

**Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter :) You guys are all awesome! : **vikwhis13, witnessgreatness21, AlliJay21, coolchick275, tank602, Twisted Illusions, Honorary Loser, Glee Club Rock 1251, Wingedgymnast12, freakycutiecarlos, cookielover101, MyHeroRaven, happygirl57, FreakierThanFreaks, PizzaTop21, Anonymous Skrtle, bubzchoc, CountryPeach05, Boots'N'Opals, Pinkranger888, BSB plus BTR equals HEAVEN… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I do ont own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

**Hope you guys like this :)**

O.o. O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Kendall looked worse than James could have ever imagined. Tubes were stuck down his throat, wires running out from his hospital gown, monitors beeping slowly. A large bandage covered most of his forehead, blood slightly seeping through the thick gauze.

The most horrible thing was the stillness. Kendall was normally a restless sleeper, meaning he twitched and moved around in his sleep (though he was nothing compared to Carlos, who constantly kicked around and talked in his sleep), but now he was motionless. If James hadn't kept constantly checking the screen that showed his friend's heart rate, he would have thought that Kendall was already dead.

To her credit, Katie didn't break down in tears like James expected. She sunk slowly into the chair beside the bed, scooting as close as she could get to her brother. Taking his limp hand and holding it gently, she closed her eyes and breathed deep.

"Could you let me spend just a few minutes alone with my brother, please?" Her voice was composed and steady, though her hands were shaking.

"Of course, Katie. Whatever you need. I'll just be out in the hall if you want me." James backed out of the room, more than willing to give Katie her alone time with Kendall. It was hard to believe that she was so young, still only a kid really, yet so mature all the time.

The corridor floor was hard, uncomfortable, and cold, but James liked it just fine. He sat in a corner; knees tucked up against his chest, and tried not to think about anything. But still pictures of a bloody Carlos, a disoriented and confused Logan, and a dying Kendall attacked his mind. Tears slipped down his cheeks, James making no attempt to wipe them away, as he waited yet again.

After around twenty minutes, he crept over to the window outside Kendall's room to see if Katie was okay, but saw the girl sobbing her heart out and pleading for her brother to wake up. It broke something deep inside James, and he didn't know how to react.

He had been there for Katie when she'd seen Logan on the gurney, and had pulled her away and held her then, but this was different. They'd been together with Carlos, and had each equally supported each other, but this was a whole new situation. This was Katie's_ brother_. James and the others were only the goofy friends that were close to brothers, but Kendall was Katie's actual flesh and blood.

Kendall was so still, Katie curled up beside him in the chair, with James hovering outside not knowing what to do. Go in? Stay outside and wait?

Inside the room, Katie was breaking down. She wanted to scream and yell herself hoarse until Kendall woke up. She needed her brother. But he didn't move, silent and motionless on the bed, a horrible tube shoved down his throat. His chest rose and fell, but it seemed fake somehow, and made Katie nervous. What if he stopped breathing? What if the machines broke? _What if he never woke up?_

Her last thought made her freeze, and choke on her tears. What if Kendall was stuck like this forever, unable to wake up? She just— Katie dropped her head into her hands and tried desperately to rid the thoughts and questions and worries and uncertainness and fear and just about every other thought that she'd had that afternoon out of her mind.

No. Kendall would wake up any second now, and Katie resolved to be there when he opened his eyes. She had to be.

Tears started streaming down her cheeks once again. Just when she thought that she couldn't cry any more, she started up again. It was one vicious circle of pain and tears, and then numbness and the feeling of being hollow.

She knew James was outside the door, hesitant on whether or not to come in. She could see him in the reflection of one of the monitors, glancing in before looking around unsure, and then checking on her again. To be honest, Katie didn't know whether she wanted him to come in or not.

On one hand, she yearned the safeness and security that James' hugs offered, needed to feel like everything was okay. But on the other hand, everything wasn't alright. It was so far from it that the whole situation seemed surreal. Logan was so far from his normal self that it scared her, Carlos was so broken and fragile, and Kendall… Her brother was—

Holding his unmoving hand gently, Katie couldn't even think of the words to describe her brother. It was just so wrong. She didn't understand why. Kendall was probably the most important person in Katie's world, and now he was… Katie's free hand clenched in a tight fist. She just didn't understand.

A knock at the door alerted her to James' presence, and she hastily wiped at her eyes. Not that James hadn't seen her cry a million times that day alone, but she didn't want to seem weak in front of him, especially since he was holding up so amazingly.

Katie had almost forgotten that James had been in the crash as well, had seen his best friends unconscious and bloody, had had the traumatic experience of being rushed to hospital. He was injured too.

"Can I see your bruises, James?" She asked quietly, looking up into his bruised face, "I need—I need to make sure that you're okay. That you… That you won't end up in the hospital too." He nodded slowly, and then lifted his dirty and slightly bloody t-shirt up so that Katie had a clear view of his torso. She immediately gasped in shock, hand flying up to cover her mouth.

James grimaced slightly, glancing down and realizing how much worse the bruising looked compared to a few hours ago. He pulled his t-shirt back down, not even feeling the pain that he was pretty sure he should be in agony from, and muttered, "It looks worse than it really is, Katie, I promise. I can't even feel it."

"Liar."

"Truth. It'll probably wreak in the morning, but for now, I think that my pain receptors are switched off or something. Cross my heart. Uh, I'm gonna go and check on Logan again, so do you want to come with me, or stay with Kendall?"

Katie considered the question, looking between James and Kendall slowly. "I, um, I think that I'll stay with my brother, if that's okay? I wanna be here when he wakes up." James nodded, pulling Katie in for one last hug, "Say hi to Logan for me… Let me know if he's any worse, and I'll come down." The brunette smiled tiredly at Katie, slipping back out the door.

Logan's room seemed easier to approach a second time, especially after seeing Carlos and Kendall in the ICU. James was nearly halfway to cracking a tiny smile at the thought of talking to a seriously confused Logan.

But when he pushed open the door of his friend's hospital room, he got a surprise.

Logan was curled up in bed, his uncasted arm flung across his face to cover his eyes. Soft moans were coming from him, the sound so un-Logan-like that it made James freeze. "Logan?" He choked out, wincing when he was answered with a groan. James' heart started pounding harder and harder, as he tried to breathe past the lump in his throat.

"Nurse, nurse!" He yelled, skidding back into the corridor and locking eyes with the nearest nurse. "Something's wrong with my friend!" The woman calmly strode into Logan's room, took one look at both Logan and his chart, before turning back to a panicking James.

"Don't worry, sweetie, it's just his concussion. He'll be a bit sore for a couple of days, and right now it's just a combination of the pain in his arm and his head. I'll be back in a few minutes with some pain medication for him, okay? Try and distract him from the pain maybe." James nodded shakily, thanking the nurse as she left just as quickly as she'd come in.

Then she was gone, and James was left alone with a whimpering Logan. Hesitating slightly, he sat down in the chair, moving it closer to the bed, and laid a tentative hand on his shoulder. When the teenager flinched away, James' heart broke, a single tear slid down his cheek.

James hastily scrubbed it away, steeling himself against any further emotions. He had to be strong for Logan, and that meant that he needed to keep control of himself.

No more crying, no more feeling sorry for himself, no more breaking down.

He could do this.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**Yes… I am an angst monster. You know you love it :)**

**So… I'm thinking maybe the next chapter up on Friday or Saturday? I'd love to hear from you guys though to see if you liked this chapter :) Oh yeah, and to those you asked – Don't worry, there will be a big James and Carlos brotherly moment coming up!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys :) So… I've had a pretty insanely busy week! Thank God it's the weekend at last :D**

**So, thanks so much again for all the amazing reviews! All you guys rock ;) **loveshj, MyHeroRaven, JennyLovesU, pinkranger888, witnessgreatness21, happygirl57, HonoraryLoser, Twisted Illusions, tank602, Glee Club Rock, coolchick275, CountryPeach05,Anonymus Skrtle, vikwhis13, BTR plus BSB equals HEAVEN, freakycutiecarlos, hannah1997, FreakierThanFreaks, bubzchoc, Boots'N'Opals, cookielover101… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Logan keeps sniffling and whimpering as James holds his hand. James thinks that maybe his heart is breaking even more. "What happened, James? Why does my head hurt so much? Everything hurts…" The brunette can only squeeze his hand, rubbing his back, holding his tears back behind the wall that he'd placed securely in his mind.

"There was an accident, Logan… You have a c-concussion, and a, um, broken arm. The nurse said that she'd come back with some pain meds so…" James twisted around for the fourth time to check to see if the nurse was coming back yet. "I, uh, I don't know where she is, and she said that she'd be back, but it's been ten minutes, and—"

James cranes his head around again, desperate.

Logan notices, and reached out to put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "James. It's okay, I'll be okay for a few more minutes, okay? Just—" The teenager's face scrunches up with pain, but he continues speaking, "Just calm down. I'm fine. You're fine. We will all be fine."

James' head falls into his hands, and his eyes squeeze closed. He must not let any tears fall; he reminds himself, no cracks at all. Logan pushes his pain down and is about to pull James into a hug, but then James looks up.

Logan, in his pain filled universe, expects to see James crying, or to see him looking broken like his voice sounds. But James straightens his face blank and controlled. "Yeah, you and I are going to be okay. And Carlos and Kendall. And then things are going to be back to normal." He says this with such certainty that Logan pauses for a second, and looks into his controlled face.

"James, are you—"

The brunette stands up so fast that the chair he had been sitting on clatters to the ground, making Logan flinch. "I'm going to go find that nurse. You just rest, and try not to focus on the pain, okay? I'm gonna make everything okay." James then practically bolts out the door, leaving Logan staring at his retreating back with a confused expression.

James held it together until he had made it into the corridor, his breaths fast and bordering on hyperventilation. He kept walking down the hall, trying to get further and further away from Logan's room, not even noticing the burning sensation that came from his chest.

He kept his fast paced stride up until his legs were about to give out, leaning up again a wall and sliding down until he hit the floor. Don't cry. Keep it together. James' hands were clenched into fists, his nails cutting into his palms, and his head bowed low.

Passersby glanced at him with concern and curiosity, but James didn't move until he was sure that he could hold himself together. Then, he forced himself to stand once again, and made his way over to the nurses' station that was located a few corridors away. James calmly asked again if Logan could get some much needed pain medication, made sure that everything was still okay with Carlos and Kendall as far as the cute nurses knew, and declined the offer of a muffin for some much needed nutrition, before heading towards an empty waiting room.

James didn't really know what he was waiting for though.

His eyes itched and burned, but still no tears fell. For the first time since the accident he felt numb. James had wanted everything to stop hurting so much, and now it looked like it had happened. Now he just needed to figure out a way to keep himself detached enough to help his friends without falling apart.

Back in his room, Logan forced his bleary eyes to stay open, and properly looked around for the first time since he'd regained consciousness. A search found his medical file lying on the bedside table, and he stretched out painfully to grab it, quickly scanning the contents.

God, his head hurt.

But Logan managed to push the pain to the side, and focus on his next task: Finding some clothes. Luckily, there was a pair of hospital scrubs on one of the empty chairs, probably left there by a distracted nurse, so Logan slowly put the pale blue bottoms on. Moving hurt, but he had to keep going. Logan wanted answers, and he wanted them now.

Getting to the door of his room was a struggle, but he somehow ended up leaning against the doorframe. So far, so good. The hallway was empty as Logan staggered out, head pounding, no one around to ask his friends' whereabouts. On the other hand, if someone had been around, Logan probably would have been sent back into his room, and banned from wandering the corridors.

He decided to just keep going until he found Carlos or Kendall, determined to figure out exactly what had happened. Logan blocked out the world around him, and concentrated on walking in a straight line, one step after another.

By some form of miracle, Logan made it all the way to the lift, trying to act calm and nonchalant as he stepped into the elevator, nodding at the other people who were giving him curious glances. Tucking his broken arm into his side, Logan reached out and pressed a random button, relieved to see that his hand wasn't shaking.

He got off at the next stop, shuffling down the corridor that had less people. His exhausted eyes missed the plaque on the wall that read _ICU._

Logan glanced quickly into each of the rooms that he passed, while dodging nurses skilfully, trying to keep his pace steady and controlled. But all that shattered when Logan's eyes caught sight of a familiar looking phone on one of the beside tables in one of the rooms that he'd only looked in for a split second.

Recognisable red buttons, cracked screen, designs scrawled all over in marker, scratches everywhere from various falls.

_No._

He limped quickly inside, shutting the door behind him, and feeling sick to the stomach when he focused on the face. It felt like someone had just sucker punched him in the gut. Fighting the urge to either throw up or sink to the ground, Logan made his way over to the bed, all traces of pain for himself forgotten. He couldn't bring himself to sit, somehow that would just make it all so much more real, so instead remained standing, speechless.

"I— Did I do this? D-did I—" Words were too painful. Logan settled for just ghosting his hand over his friend's, afraid to properly touch him. Grabbing the chart like it was water in a desert, the teenager desperately scanned through it, having to read it more than once due to the tears blurring up his vision.

Logan hesitantly said his friend's name, feeling hope soar that he'd get a response, but there was only silence. Stillness. He was supposed to wake up. Logan ran his fingers through his hair, trying to keep breathing normally, but failing slightly. He trembled as sobs threatened to overwhelm him, unable to tear his eyes away from the broken body of his best friend.

He wanted to run back to his room, to lose himself in a haze of pain medication, and to pretend that all of this was a dream, that he'd open his eyes and be back at the Palm Woods, but Logan couldn't.

Because this was real, the pain was real, the silence was real, the fear was real, the memories were real, the tears were real, and the desperation was real… Logan found himself breaking down, finding it impossible to keep all the tears and pleas inside.

"Oh, God, please wake up, man. I need you, Carlos, I need to know that you're okay— That I didn't kill you. Please, please just open your eyes, dude, please I need you to just wake up! I can't—You have to wake up, please, damnit_, please_…"

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.

**So, I hope that this chapter didn't suck too much! Sorry that it's shorter than the last few chapters, but I've been really busy :0**

**I'm hoping to have the next chapter up by Wednesday, so check it out then if you're interested :) Feedback gets me motivated and helps me write faster, so… Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys :) Thanks so much for all the reviews this week! I love each and every one of them all, so thanks so much for taking the time to let me know what you thought of the last chapter :D Thanks to: **cookielover101, happygirl57, witnessgreatness21, vikwhis13, MyHeroRaven, coolchick275, Glee Club Rock, FreakierThanFreaks, bubzchoc, BTR'slovesong, freakiecutiecarlos, CountryPeach05, Pinkranger888, Anonymous Skrtle, HonoraryLoser, MistySorrow, fgh... **:D**

**Thanks a bunch for all the alerts and favourites too!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush... Sorry for any mistakes :) **

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

When James had finally managed to drag himself up from the uncomfortable chair, his face expressionless and mind about to burst with all sorts of emotions, he made his way back to Logan's room, determined to be strong for his friend. But when he peered in the doorway to make sure Logan wasn't sleeping or anything, he froze and blanked.

"Shit."

Logan was gone. He wasn't in the room, the crumpled bed sheets a sign that the teenager had gotten out of bed. James stood still for a few terrifying seconds, before spinning around and sprinting to the nurses' station. All the while that he was hurriedly explaining the situation, stuttering and fumbling around the words, his mind was keeping a steady mantra of _damn, damn, damn_, I lost him_, damn, damn, damn..._

When the nurses panicked, while still trying to retain an air of professionalism, and began to alert security and any nearby orderlies, James was seriously freaking out. "What kind of hospital _loses_ a fucking patient?" He screamed, almost swaying on his feet with the pressure that was building in his mind. What kind of friend loses his injured best friend on his watch?

Unsure of what to do with all the drama unfolding around him, James almost passed out when he realised that maybe Carlos had woken up, and gotten out of bed too, and gotten the crutches in his room, and set off down the corridor, and was lost too, and—

Even thought he was aware that this was a ridiculous fear, and that it was very unlikely that Carlos was even awake, James let out another curse, before running at full speed towards the stair wells. His footsteps echoed around the staircase, and James remembered being vaguely aware that his chest felt kinda weird, and probably should have been hurting like hell, but he pushed that thought aside.

Get to Carlos.

Reaching the ICU, James pushed past a pissed off looking nurse, and burst into Carlos' room. And promptly skidded to a halt for the second time in five minutes. What the—

"Logan?"

The teenager in question was sobbing beside a motionless Carlos, hunched over in the hospital chair. He didn't respond to James' calls, only crying louder at the sound of his friend's voice. "He isn't waking up! I don't know what to do! He won't wake up, James..."

"Hey, Logan, hey... Calm down, okay, man. Carlos' fine. He was awake and talking when I was here like half an hour ago, and then he got some more pain meds, and, well, you know how much of a lightweight Carlitos is when he's on pain meds." James hesitantly put a hand on Logan's shaking shoulder. "Are you in any pain, Logan? You should probably get back to your room so you can rest."

Logan shook his head stubbornly, trying to hide the wince that accompanied any sudden movements. James raised an eyebrow. "Well, for one, I just don't believe that. And secondly... I kinda freaked out on all of the nurses, yelling that they lost you, so now the whole hospital is being searched. You scared me, man."

Cracking a small smile, Logan slowly started to push himself out of the chair, causing James to lunge forward to help support his friend. "Just, take it slow, Logan, easy does it. Maybe I should go and see if I can commandeer a wheelchair or something...?" He let that idea go after Logan protested loudly, shaking his head slightly in frustration at Logan for being so damn headstrong, before helping Logan shuffle towards the door.

"Wait!" Logan stopped dead and twisted around to look at Carlos, "What if he wakes up and is alone? James, promise me that you'll come straight back up to him once I get back to my room. I don't want him to be scared –we all know what Carlos is like when he's alone in hospital..."

"Yeah, yeah, sure, but let's get you back first before the nurses all revolt against me... Some of them are really hot, you know..." James cracked a bad joke, something only he would say, in an attempt to get the pinched, worried look off Logan's face. Sure enough, his friend's eyes rolled and he gave James a half annoyed look. James could picture Logan saying_, I've gotta get new friends_...

Once they stepped out of the elevator on Logan's floor, the two boys were overwhelmed by the sea of people who swarmed them. In the space of a second, Logan was ripped away from where he had been leaning mostly on James, gently manhandled into a wheelchair, and pushed quickly towards his room. "Carlos!" Logan weakly yelled back at James, "Go to Carlos!"

James considered staying down with a pale looking Logan, but he saw that there was no chance of him squeezing past the doctors into the room, and he didn't want to make Logan upset by breaking his promise to go back to Carlos.

So he wearily trudged back up all the stairs, the elevator was too cramped and reminded James of being trapped in the car, and slipped past the nurses into Carlos' room. It was disconcerting to see that Carlos still hadn't moved an inch from his prone position on the bed, and it freaked James out to see how vulnerable his small friend looked.

"So, um, hey Carlos. I don't know if you can hear me, but I guess that I'll just keep talking until you decide to wake up from that really long nap that you're taking, huh? You always hated silence anyway, so maybe this'll help you wake up faster... Well, I really have no idea, 'cause I'm not a doctor or anything, but, um... it's worth a shot, buddy." Still no movement. "I, uh, went to see Kendall a while ago. He's still asleep, like you, but Katie's up there with him, and I'm going to go up in a while and see if they're okay, but I figured that they should have some alone time, seeing as they're brother and sister..."

Then, a twitch. James faltered in his sentence, eyes focusing in on the Latino's limp hand that was cradled in his own. "Carlos...? You waking up for me, buddy? Did I just feel you squeeze my hand? Can you, um, do it again maybe?"

After a short pause, James felt his hand being weakly squeezed again. "Yeah, that's awesome, man; can you try and open your eyes? Just for a second, I just need to make sure that you're okay." Carlos' face scrunched up, the stitches being pulled again, making James flinch in pain on behalf of his friend, and slowly his eyes fluttered open.

"Carlos! Carlos, hey, man, hey... God, am I glad to see you awake." Carlos managed to smile faintly at James, a hint of confusion and grogginess in his expression. "Do you feel okay? Like, are you hurting anywhere? Cause I can run and get a nurse to get you some more meds in a few minutes, and I don't want you to be in pain, and—"

"J-James... M'fine, man..." Carlos shifted slightly in the bed, "And, I'm sorry..."

"Oh shit, Carlos, please don't be sorry! You didn't do anything wrong, I was just being a total ass this morning, and I'm just so sorry, man, I really am. I really hope that you can forgive me for being the worst friend ever, and I really am so _so_ sorry, but I can understand if—"

James trailed off when he saw Carlos painfully lift his arms up. The Latino didn't say anything, but James understood perfectly. James bent down and carefully wrapped his arms around Carlos, feeling some of the pressure in his heart melt away as Carlos hugged back. "Don't be sorry..." Carlos muttered thickly, "M'just glad that y-you're okay..."

Carlos smelled like Fruit Smackers and spice and dirt and a hint of blood, but it was just like always. James gently hugged back, relieved that his friend seemed to be actually okay, one of the few good pieces of news that he'd gotten all day.

"Yeah, I'm fine, Carlos, I'm perfectly okay now." And James did feel okay, for the first time since the car had been hit. Because Carlos was awake and fine, and Logan was okay, and Carlos wasn't mad at him.

"But, what about Kendall, James...?"

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**So, I hope that was okay! Don't worry, I'll definitely include Kendall in the next chapter :D The next update will probably be Saturday, so check it out then if you want to!**

**Review...?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xxx**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey everyone :) Sorry for the delay with this chapter, my weekend was crazy busy, and loads of stuff was going on so I didn't get a chance to finish this in time… Apologies!**

**Thanks so much for everyone who reviewed the last chapter: **loveshj, Baxxie, Glee Club Rock, happygirl57, coolchick275, vikwhis13, cookielover101, bubzchoc, CountryPeach05, FreakierThanFreaks, Anonymous Skrtle, MyHeroRaven, witnessgreatness21, Twisted Illusions… **:D Thanks a bunch for all the alerts and faves as well!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

**Enjoy… **

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

James started at Carlos' question, looking slowly into the Latino's brown eyes, "W-What did you say?"

Carlos tries to hide the shudder of pain that comes from moving ever so slightly in his bed, repeating his question, "I said, what about Kendall? Is he okay?" Carlos is clearly still in a lot of pain, not having had any pain medication since a few hours ago, but James can see his friend trying to ignore the fact that he can't move more than a millimetre without hissing in agony.

"Hey, maybe I should go get a nurse or something… You look really pale, and you're hurting, and—" Then Carlos moves faster that James had seen him move during his visit, reaching out to grab James' wrist tightly.

He's restricted though, because of the IV snaking out of the back of his hand, so with a burst of desperation, Carlos rolls over onto his side in order to reach James. This requires him moving his leg quickly and lifting, but Carlos just grits his teeth and lunges for James. His ribs are strained with the effort of twisting, his leg burning with such an intensity that Carlos wants to scream, but the teenager keeps going.

His eyes water with tears waiting to spill over, the lacerations on his face even clearer against his pale face, but somehow Carlos manages to do all this without letting a whimper or shout of pain out.

"Shit, man!" James is pulled sharply forward from where he had been looking for a way out of the conversation that he _really_ didn't want to have, and is yanked down to Carlos' eye level.

The sound of Carlos' harsh breathing fills the room in between his forced words.

"What's wrong… with K-Kendall? He—He's still… alive, isn't… he? Tell… Me, James… Need to know…" James quickly panics, seeing Carlos' ashen face, and not liking the sound of the forced wheezes one bit.

If there's one thing that Carlos is 'good' at, it's being unable to rest (even when's he's badly injured) if he doesn't know for sure that one of his friends is okay. It's a trait that all boys possess, but Carlos has it with such an intensity that it scares the hell out of James, and can end in disastrous consequences. Like now.

"Carlos! Carlos, relax, buddy, Kendall's okay, I promise!" Carlos seems to be getting paler by the second, and James can see his eyes doing that half rolling thing that they always do just when Carlos is about to pass out, but is fighting it. "Hey, you have to calm down, okay? Just keeping breathing for me, yeah, otherwise you're gonna pass out… In and out, buddy, in and out…"

James manages to pry Carlos' stone hard grip off his wrist, and he lowers his friend's tense body back onto the hospital bed. Carlos' breaths are coming out in pants now, his jaw clenched and eyes full of pain yet determined to stay conscious – James still hasn't told him enough about Kendall.

It takes a few heart-stopping minutes, Carlos' eyes squeezed tightly closed, but then his breathing stops sounding terrifying and he focuses on a shaky James again.

"J-James, are you okay?"

"Am I— God, Carlos, you're just… Yeah, M'fine." Frowning slightly, Carlos coughs pointedly, raising his eyebrows, "Oh, and, uh, Kendall… Well, he's okay too. Just a, um, head trauma that hehasntwokenupfromyet, but he's gonna be fine too." James gets the middle part of that sentence out as fast as he can, but Carlos has always been the best at deciphering mumbled sentences.

"Kendall! That can't be normal though… Oh shit, I gotta go see him. Now. James— Help me get out of this stupid bed." Carlos goes into panic mode, and tries to sit up immediately.

This causes the small teenager to be hit with another wave of agony, his body flopping back onto the bed as he whimpers and moans in pain. Tears spill down his tanned cheeks, and he raises a trembling hand to wipe them away. "You… hav'ta help me… James, gotta get… to Kendall…"

James shakes his head softly, holding Carlos' hand to get him through the worst of the pain. "You're not in any shape to be going anywhere, man, except to sleep." Carlos pleads silently with his eyes, ribs in so much agony that he is unable to use his breaths on anything but breathing harshly.

"Hey, Carlos, you know I'm right, buddy… How about you get some rest, and I'll go check on Kendall for you, okay? I'll send Katie down to get some food, and then she can come and visit you and Logan, okay?" With a pained frown, Carlos grudgingly agrees, nodding his head an inch. Carlos watches James walk out the door, wishing that he could join him, before settling back down on the pillows.

It's only when he's left alone for the first time that he can feel the tightness in his face. He painfully lifts his hand up, brushing it lightly against his face, and whimpering in pain and shock when he can feel the bumpy stitches in his forehead.

Carlos pulls his hand away quickly in shock, but then a few seconds later he finds himself running his fingers all across his face, discovering the abundance of deep lacerations that have been stitched, and the smaller, but still deep, cuts. He wonders what he must look like, all stitched up like Frankenstein. Though looks have never really mattered to him, Carlos still finds a few stray tears dripping down his cheeks.

They reach his chin and sting when they come into contact with another cut, only making Carlos cry silently even harder. He's had stitches loads of times before, so he knows that they'll fade until there's only a small scars left, but never so many at the same time on his face.

He doesn't want to be the ugly one in the band.

Carlos sits in his hospital bed, alone, tracing the paths of the deep cuts along his forehead and right cheekbone, imagining what his face must look like. His ribs are burning with every breath, his leg aches, and everything else just plain hurts. He can't even get out of bed to see his other injured friend. So Carlos lies still and cries.

Down the hall, James has managed to convince Katie that she needs a much needed break, from where she had been curled up against an unmoving Kendall for the past hour, and he's now sitting in the chair beside his best friend.

Kendall's hand is pale and limp and feels heavy in James'. "This is so fucked up, Kendall." James struggles to keep the tears out of his voice. "I'm not the leader. I'm not the one who's supposed to fix things. That's you, man. You're supposed to come up with a plan to make everything better, all the time, and to make everyone okay, and I— I just can't do that." He sighs, drawing in another shuddering breath.

"'Cause Logan's still not himself, all drugged up and disoriented, and Carlos… He's just so broken and in pain, but still trying to carry on as normal when he just can't. And, they're all depending on me to step up, and make things all okay again, like they used to be, but I just don't know what to do. This is your thing! Why won't you wake up, Kendall, and tell me what to do? Tell me how to cope and handle with everything and keep going! I need you!"

James stares into Kendall's slack face, feeling sick to his stomach when he sees no signs of any movement.

"_What am I supposed to do_?"

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**For those of you who are Supernatural fans out there, I was going for the same kind of emotion with James at the end when Dean had with Sam when he dies for the first time (All Hell Breaks Loose part 1). For those of you who aren't… Watch it :) That show is practically my life!**

**Anyway, I hope that was okay :) Sorry if it sucked! I'll try have the next chapter up on Friday so check it out then :)**

**So, I've noticed that the number of reviews has gone down, and I'm just wondering if there's anything that you guys are wanting to see, or are seeing too much of in this story? I'd really like to know so I can improve more, so please let me know if I'm going wrong anywhere :)**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmeWithMyComputer xx **


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey everyone :) Yes, I know… Late update again! Sorry, I had a really busy week!**

**Thanks so much for all the reviews, you guys are all so amazing and nice: **FanfictionRulesMyLife, happygirl57, Glee Club Rock, Anonymous Skrtle, coolchick275, MSUbtrfan, vikwhis13, MistySorrow, witnessgreatness21, FreakierThanFreaks, CountryPeach05, Twisted Illusions, marykateluvsu, freakycutiecarlos, bubzchoc… **:D Thanks for all the alerts and favourites too!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes :)**

**Enjoy…**

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

Carlos is motionless in the bed when a nurse opens the door quietly. He scrambles for the bed controls, and awkwardly hits the button the raise the bed into a sitting position, feeling vulnerable when he's flat on his back. Carlos' body screams in protest, sharp pains erupting all along his torso, but he keeps his face calm and even manages to smile at the woman.

"Oh, honey, you shouldn't be sitting up yet. Here, let's lie you back down, and I have your pain meds so you should be more comfortable in a few minutes." The nurse surges forward, concern in her gentle face, but stops when Carlos shakes his head quickly and holds up his hands in an almost defensive pose. His eyes begin to water from the movements, but Carlos forces himself to suck it up.

"No, please, no… I'm fine. Not even that sore, promise. I've broken loads of stuff before, so I'm used to it by now." The relatively young nurse looks unsure, so Carlos continues. "Besides, I'm sixteen, and you don't have a legal guardian for me here, so technically I can make my own medical decisions. And, I was wondering if you could get a wheelchair or some crutches for me, cause I need to see one of my friends…"

The nurse pauses, considering the situation. The teenager is right, in a way, about his medical situation. And he didn't seem to be in any pain. His face was calm and relaxed looking, with a hint of worry in those big brown eyes. He'd just been in a car accident though, so of course he'd want to see his friend, to make sure that he was okay. Maybe if—

But then she comes to her senses, once her eyes wander to his face and see the stitches and bruises. The kid had been in a serious car accident just a few hours ago, with serious injuries, he definitely shouldn't be getting out of bed to wander around. No way.

Carlos mentally curses when the nurse's face turns from one of consideration to firmness. "I'm sorry, sweetie, but I can't let you do that. Let's get some meds into you now…" She moves towards Carlos' IV stand, but falters when she sees his desolate expression.

"No meds, p-please. They'll just knock me out, and I don't even need them…" Carlos focuses his best puppy dog eyes on her, determined not to give up until she left. He could do this for ages.

Finally, the nurse breaks eye contact first, and puts the syringe away. "Well, I guess if your pain is manageable… But you still have to stay in bed and rest, okay?" Carlos nods innocently, not letting his pain free mask go until the nurse had exited out the door. He then lets out a shaky sigh, leaning back against the pillows in relief, but not before he catches sight of an abandoned wheelchair just outside his door.

The object was just _waiting _to be commandeered.

Knowing that if he was going to go see Logan he was going to need a plan, Carlos started to think hard. He tried to do a Kendall, and think up a plan under pressure. Then he decided to think smart, like Logan, and figure it out. James' method of finding inspiration in girls and random objects didn't work either. So Carlos was left to his own devices, squeezing his eyes tightly and scrunching up his forehead in his typical thinking position.

Ten minutes later he had it sussed out. Kinda.

James' big hoodie that was draped across the back of a chair in his room was snagged, and Carlos slowly pulled it on. Pain is good, he told himself, pain makes you sharper and less likely to screw up. If he'd taken the pain medication that he so desperately wanted, he'd be groggy and useless for the rest of the day, and wouldn't be able to see Logan. Carlos _needed_ to make sure that Logan was okay.

Now came the hard part. Carlos clenched his jaw, and swung his legs over the bad so they hung a few inches above the floor. His vision whitened, and Carlos was sure that he was going to pass out, but he held his screams in and lowered himself onto the floor. The moment his cast hit the ground, a yelp escaped him and he crashed to the floor.

Face pressed into the lino floor, Carlos grits his teeth and tries to get up. But his ribs are in agony, and he can't even feel his leg anymore, it's that sore. He manages to struggle up so that he's leaning on his elbows, but his arms are shaking with the effort, and he ends up falling again.

Tears of frustration make an appearance, but Carlos wipes them angrily away, so angry with himself that he slams his fist against the floor_. Why is he so useless?_ He's there on the ground for a good half an hour, the call button too far up to reach, and his body too weak to drag himself off the ground. Carlos considers calling for help, but he's too proud. He can get up on his own.

His attempts are futile though, and by the time he's been there for another twenty minutes, he gives up. Carlos lies on the cold floor, counting the number of stitches in his face with a pale hand, infuriated with himself.

Then the door of his room opens, and he hears a gasp of shock, followed quickly by a scream, "_Carlos_!" He thinks about lifting his head up to meet Katie's eyes, but everything just hurts too much, and he doesn't want her to see the helplessness in his eyes. He can hear her footsteps running for help, and just as quickly as she'd come in; she's back, with an army of people.

Carlos is rolled over gently by strange hands, a small light shining in his eyes, and is bombarded by questions from the doctors and nurses. He doesn't reply, only lying here with a blank look on his face while they move him to the bed, and reattach the IV that he'd pulled out. Katie is crying, he realises, over by the door, but Carlos can't summon up the strength to look over.

He only starts to fight the strangers when he sees the syringes looming over him, about to be injected into his IV. Carlos somehow finds the strength to strike out with his arms, and begins to thrash around on the bed. No meds, he tries to scream, because it makes him feel weird and funny, but he seems to have lost his voice.

Carlos keeps bucking and hitting and punching though, because he's _scared_, and doesn't want to be medicated. All he wanted was to see Logan, but then he messed that up, and he's just so _angry_ at everything. Angry at himself the most.

But he's held down by strong grips, and he can see the syringe being injected into him, but he can't do anything about it. Carlos' strength is gone, but still he manages to scream out, slamming his head back against the pillow.

And then everything is slowing down, and it's getting harder to keep his eyes open. Carlos' feels himself succumbing to the sedative, but still tries to stay awake, only succeeding in catching a glimpse of Katie's face before his eyes roll back in his head, and he's unconscious.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Katie bursts into her brother's hospital room, and throws herself into a surprised James' arms. She's sobbing into his shoulder before he can even register what's happened, but his arms automatically close around her, and he's softly asking her what happened.

In between her cries, he makes out the word _Carlos_, and then he's panicking. "What happened, Katie? What's wrong with Carlos? Katie!"

It takes a minute, but then she starts spilling all the details out to James, "I-I just walked into h-his room, and he was lying there on the floor! I ran, and g-got people, but he—he wasn't moving or a-answering and then he just went crazy… He—He started fighting them, and thrashing, and screaming, and then they injected something into him, and he was knocked out, but—but… _James_!"

James holds Katie until her tears stop, desperate to get to Carlos, but afraid to leave Katie alone. She finally stops sobbing, settling herself in a chair and pulling it up close to Kendall. "Can I be alone with him for awhile?"

"Sure, Katie. I'm gonna go, um, check on Carlos, okay?" James makes it out into the corridor without breaking into a sprint, but then he starts running, and only skids to a stop outside Carlos' room. He peeks his head nervously into the room, relieved to see that it's empty apart from a sleep Carlos. But his relief turns to anger when he sees the dried tears on Carlos' face, and the Velcro restraints wrapped tightly around his friend's wrists.

_Oh, fuck._

**O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o**

**So, I hope that this chapter was okay :) I re-wrote it like a million times. The next one will have more angst for all… and some surprises! I'll try and have it up by Friday, but your feedback really helps me get motivated (I get really distracted sometimes!), so I'll post it earlier if I get it finished :)**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey guys :) So… I do actually have a reason for my lateness again! I was asked to babysit on very short notice on Friday, so I had to do that, and then last night, I fucking deleted this whole chapter. Aaagh. I was so annoyed at myself. So, sorry again to all you guys who were waiting for this :O**

**Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! You guys are so amazing :) **happygirl57, MyHeroRaven, I C a big world, CountryPeach05, Glee Club Rock 1251, vikwhis13, coolchick275, MistySorrow, HonoraryLoser, witnessgreatness21, FreakierThanFreaks, bubzchoc, Twisted Illusions, Channylover26, Anonymous Skrtle, Lizay, SweetPeaKiller **:D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Logan opened his eyes blearily, blinking slowly as the world around him came into focus. He was lying flat on his back, looking up at a cream coloured ceiling, one that seemed to be spinning.

He lifted his other hand to rub his eyes, but was stopped by the tugging of an IV. Well, crap. That explained the tiredness and dizziness. More drugs. Probably morphine, judging by the extent of his symptoms. Logan shook his head in an attempt to clear it, but stopped quickly when he felt like his world was about to explode.

Logan really needed to get them to stop drugging him.

He lay in contented silence for a few minutes, enjoying the effects of the morphine. He knew better than most that when the meds wore off, he would be sore. His head would start pounding, and his arm aching, and everything else would just throb. So, determined to enjoy the numbness while it lasted, Logan closed his eyes and relaxed.

He considered trying to escape from his room again, but he ended up being dragged back to his room last time he went to see Carlos, and he wasn't high the last time. Logan was pretty sure that if he even lifted his head up, he'd throw up.

Somewhere during the haze of morphine, the door was opened, and footsteps came scurrying. Logan's eyes half opened, not really seeing anything, but then they slipped back closed again, the bubble of pain medication too tempting to resist. He felt a small hand grab his and squeeze it slightly, before he drifted off again.

The next time Logan resurfaced, the medication was wearing off, and he was starting to feel more normal. It turned out that it had been Katie, who had been holding his limp hand tightly, and she was now sleeping with her head resting on the bed.

Logan smiled slightly, looking down on her sleeping form, and thinking that she looked peaceful for the first time since the accident. Her long fingers were intertwined with his, and her head was pressed up against his side. Dark hair spilling all over the side of the bed, mouth slightly open, eyes closed, it was exactly how Katie would look whenever she would fall asleep on the couch at the Palm Woods.

Usually, if she was too deeply asleep, one of the boys would lift her up carefully, and a small parade would march into her room. The covers would be pulled back; Katie placed gently in the bed, her shoes and jumper taken slowly off. Then, they'd make sure that she looked comfortable, Carlos normally grabbing a stuffed toy off a shelf and tucking it in beside her. Kendall would bend down and ruffle her hair, before the four friends would all sneak out of the room, smiles being exchanged silently.

The teenager reached over with his casted hand, the one that Katie wasn't gripping tightly, and ruffled her hair sadly. Things were really messed up.

Moving a small bit in the bed so that he was lying on his side, Logan draped an arm over Katie, feeling her warmth and giving her a quick hug, before letting his eyes slip closed again. The small contact that he had with Katie made everything seem just a tiny bit less horrible, and Logan held onto that shred of hope that things would return to normal.

This was the scene that the nurse walked in on, Katie snuggled up to Logan, and the older boy with one arm wrapped around her. Not wanting to intrude, the woman decided that taking Logan's temperature wasn't really that important, that it could be done later, and backed quietly out of the room, a smile on her face.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

One floor up, at the nurses' station, James was locked in a vicious debate with one of the nurses. "— Can you please just take off the damn restraints! He doesn't need them – Carlos is the sweetest, non-violent person I've ever met! He doesn't need them..."

"Well, you can tell that to the doctor who's in the staff room at the moment, icing his black eye." At the sight of James' devastated face, the nurse relented a bit, and continued in a softer tone. "Look, they're just there to make sure that he doesn't hurt himself. How do you think he got out of the bed in the first place? It's probably just the pain medication, making him feel disoriented, and we have to make sure that he doesn't make his injuries worse while he's not himself, okay?"

James opened his mouth to argue, but was too tired to get in a big discussion. His ribs were aching, and it hurt every time he took a breath in. "Fine, whatever. But he's gonna be pissed when he wakes up."

Stalking angrily back to Carlos' room, James tried to ignore the throbbing in his chest, and focus on Carlos. At that particular moment in time, James was determined to be there for Carlos, 100%.

His friend was sleeping deeply, but it was a fake sleep, caused by heavy sedatives that had been injected into him against his will. His casted leg was propped up on a few pillows, having swelled even more as a result of Carlos falling onto it. The stitches in his face stood out, drawing James' attention like they always did whenever he looked Carlos in the face, and made Carlos seem more broken than before.

James ran a hand though his hair, and sighed deeply. He had failed Carlos. Carlos had never gotten so panicked and scared in a hospital that they'd had to sedate him, let alone fucking _restrain_ him. James should have been there for the Latino to calm him down, and just be there. God only knows how long Carlos had been lying helpless on the ground before Katie had found him.

James shuddered, scared at the thought of Carlos vulnerable and scared on the cold floor. He hadn't even shouted out for help, probably too stubborn, and that made his friend even sadder. Carlos never did like accepting help when he was hurt.

He held Carlos' limp hand gently, hating the way the thick black restraints were so visible against Carlos' tanned skin. They just looked so wrong, fixed around Carlos' arms, literally waiting until he woke up so that they could hold him back down. James itched to rip them off and throw them out the window, but he was afraid to.

What if Carlos then woke up, and really did hurt himself even more? But on the other hand, what would happen when he woke up and found himself strapped down? James didn't know what to do.

In the end, he settled for covering the restraints with the covers on the bed, promising himself that if Carlos woke up and started freaking out, he'd immediately take them off. Surely the hospital staff knew what to do in these situations, and that everything would turn out okay in the end?

James just hoped that Carlos wouldn't hate him when he woke up.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Just a few doors down, in Kendall's room, there was silence. The monitors kept beeping, the ventilator continued pumping air into Kendall's chest with the usual whoosh-click, and the heart rate monitor was steady. The teenager in the bed was still, an ugly purple bruise in the middle of his forehead a clear indication of why he wasn't waking up.

The question on everyone's minds was why? Way had he struggled out of his seatbelt, broken free of possibly the only thing that could have saved him from this horrible outcome? He could be walking around now, probably uninjured, if he had just kept his seatbelt on.

The answer was simple. He had cracked.

Kendall was the one who acted well under pressure; the one guy that everyone knew who you could be certain would come up with a brilliant plan in the nick of time. So, when the first SUV was seconds away from smashing into the side of the car, Kendall had panicked. His fingers had fumbled to unbuckle his seatbelt, mind racing and heart pounding, time slowing down.

He'd somehow believed that if he could get free fast enough he'd be able to reach forward and grab the wheel from Logan, or pull Carlos away from the window that was about to shatter, or jump out of the car, or do something, anything, to prevent the unthinkable. But the second that he'd torn away the seatbelt, the cars had collided, and Kendall had gone headfirst into the back of James' seat.

Then they'd been hit from behind, and all he could hear was the sound of screaming and yelling, and then Kendall blacked out. He crumpled back into his seat, head lolling around on the backseat, before the car came to a halt, Kendall motionless and unresponsive to James' screams.

Somewhere, in the silent and still room, something moved. It was only a slight twitch of Kendall's finger, barely noticeable had there been anyone there to see it. But there was no one, and so nobody knew. But that small movement was enough to spark a hint of activity in Kendall brain, and get things working again.

Slowly, and alone, Kendall began to claw his way back to consciousness.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.

**So, I hope that chapter was okay :) I wanted to squeeze all of the boys in there! Lol, I think that this is the longest chapter yet :P I'll try and get the next chapter up by Wednesday, so check it out then if you want!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello, all you fanfictioners :) Yay, finally an update that's not late! Well, there is actually a reason for this being on time :P I'm on crutches since Monday, and so have suddenly found myself with heaps of spare time :D Its actually creepy how many hours that there are in the day when you're not doing anything!**

**Thanks so much to all the reviewers for the last chapter! You know I love you guys :) **Twisted Illusions, bubzchoc, happygirl57, Glee Club Rock 1251, HonoraryLoser, vikwhis13, BSB plus BTR equals HEAVEN, coolchick275, CountryPeach05, jadenlover17, FreakierThanFreaks, MistySorrow, demifan4evr, FanfictionRulesMyLife, BTR'slovesong, Anonymous Skrtle, Channylover26, BigTimeLovers14, MyHeroRaven **:D (Sorry if I ever forget anyone in these!)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Carlos woke up in stages. First, he became aware of the fact that he was lying flat on his back. Then, his next thought was that the sheets he was sleeping on were _really_ scratchy and weird. Next came the smells. Antiseptic flooded his nose, and he scrunched up his face slightly, trying to rid the shocking smell from his senses. It didn't work.

Hospital... He found himself thinking next, he must be in a hospital. Come to think of it, Carlos realised that his leg hurt. Like, really hurt. The thoughts floated around in his mind for a few minutes, before dissolving away. Sleep sounded good right then.

But what was that annoying noise? A wheezing kind of gasping sound was coming from Carlos' right, keeping the groggy teenager away from sleep. Carlos managed to pry his heavy eyes open after several minutes, forcing himself to try and wake up so that he could get that awful noise to stop, and then go back to sleep.

But when his eyes finally got used to the harsh bright lights, he was met with the sight of the top of James' head. It was not something that Carlos normally saw, due to James' monstrous height and his own shortness, so it took him a second to fully take in the scene.

James was doubled over at the waist, head resting on Carlos' bed, and was shaking slightly. Just as Carlos was about to ask his friend if he could make that weird noise stop, he copped it.

James was the one making the gasping, choking like sounds.

The first thing that Carlos did was try and shake James with his hands, a lump growing in his throat. But then he became aware of the thick black restraints around both his wrists, pinning him down. He struggled and twisted to get free, panic beginning to make itself known, but he was trapped.

"Help!" He tried to yell, both for James and himself, but his throat was too dry, Carlos not having drank anything since the orange juice disaster that morning.

His voice came out in sore little wheezes, too quiet and low to be heard by anyone. Carlos tried coughing, but it didn't help. He struggled some more against the restraints, but he was trapped.

Claustrophobia started to overwhelm him, the fear of being tied down threatening to break him down into a sobbing, incoherent mess, but Carlos kept trying. He cast desperate glances at the panic/help button beside his pillow, but he was too far away to even have a chance of reaching it. The restraints felt like they were tightening around him.

By this point, James' breathing had gotten even worse, and he still wasn't responding to Carlos' hoarse pleas for him to wake up. Deciding that he had no other choice, Carlos began to throw his head back against the pillow, in an attempt to hit the panic button by chance.

Slamming his head into the pillow wasn't doing anything, so the Latino angled his head to the side, trying to aim more precisely for the call button. Missing the button yet again, he managed to hit his head off the metal railings at the top of the bed, making a loud noise as his head came into contact with the hard surface. Carlos continued to throw his head back once he realised that it was making some kind of sound, all the while pathetically wheezing out for "Help!"

Finally, probably drawn by the odd sounds coming from inside the room, an orderly popped his head curiously into the room. He immediately froze at the sight of Carlos slamming his head back against the bed, and ran over quickly.

His eyes widened upon seeing the restraints around Carlos' wrists, and he lunged forward to grab the teenager's head before he could hurt himself again, not even seeing James slumped in his chair just centimetres away. "Oh, God, stop! It's okay, buddy, it's okay... Just stop fighting me!"

"My-my friend!" Carlos choked out, struggling to get any sounds out, "Can't breathe! Help him please..."

The man's attention immediately switched from a panicked Carlos to James, who was slumped over in the chair and barely breathing. The orderly pressed the call button efficiently, calling out for help, while lifting James' head up gently, seeing half closed eyes and pale skin. People came flooding into the room, carrying a stretcher and oxygen masks and IVs and syringes and charts and then more people with tubes and wires and—

Carlos couldn't take it anymore, the feeling of helplessness and being trapping pressing down even more on him, and began to strain against the restraints again. "James!" He tried to scream out, but all that came out was a weak whisper. And then James was being carried out, the room emptying, and the noise that had been everywhere was fading away.

But Carlos was still trapped, pinned to the bed like an animal for slaughter. Or, at least that's what it felt like.

Tears were running down his face with the fear of the situation, and his voice was completely gone by this point. His head was hurting too, as a result of banging to against the head of the bed, and his leg was killing him.

What if they forgot about him, and left him tied down for hours? Carlos started struggling even harder. It was getting harder to breathe through the hiccups and tears, and he didn't think that he'd ever felt as vulnerable or helpless in his life. As much as he knew that it would be better for him if he tried to calm down, Carlos' couldn't stop the panic, and he could feel that he was on the way to being hysterical.

Where had they taken James? What was wrong with James? Why couldn't he breathe? Carlos had thought that James had been the only one who'd not gotten hurt in the accident, because he'd been walking around, and taking care of everyone, and just plain being the leader.

Thinking of leaders made Carlos think of Kendall, and that just led to more tears. Was Kendall okay? No one had told Carlos much about his best friend, and he was worried. Scared for Kendall, and James, and Logan too. How had things gone so bad so fast? That morning they'd all been messing and joking around in the Palm Wood, and then things had gone downhill so fast that it made Carlos want to scream.

Finally, a nurse came scurrying in, probably hearing Carlos' hoarse sobs, and injected something into the crook of his tied down arm. He didn't resist it, just felt his eyes slip closed, hating himself for his weakness and helplessness.

Maybe he could have help James if he hadn't been so weak and vulnerable that they'd felt the need to fucking restrain him. And god only knows what was happening to James now.

_Please don't die_.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Back in his own room, Logan was awake at last and fully lucid for the first time in hours, reassuring a still worried Katie that he really was alright. The nurse came in, took his blood pressure and temperature, before winking at Logan, and telling him that he could go on a small walk if he wanted.

Logan beamed at this, Katie smiling back at him. He allowed himself to be helped out of bed, ignoring the way the nurse was treating him as if he was a little kid, just happy to be finally getting somewhere. He shrugged the nurse off as soon as he made it out into the hallway, heading for the elevator with Katie, and shouting back over his shoulder that he promised not to over do it.

It had never felt so good to press the elevator button, Logan excited that he would finally be able to see Kendall for the first time since the accident. Things were going to get better now, he was sure of it, and soon they would all be heading back to relax beside the Palm Woods pool with all their friends. Logan's grin got bigger.

But the sight that met him when he turned the corner towards Kendall's room made him freeze.

There were a sea of people inside the room, most of them doctors, and they were all gathered around the bed. Logan stopped dead in his tracks, his breath hitching in his throat, and his mind went numb. He didn't know what to think.

He didn't think that he wanted to know what had happened, for fear of the unknown.

Logan had managed to scrape some scraps of information about Kendall's condition from James and the nurses', and from what he'd heard, it didn't sound good. So, when faced with this sight, he simply froze. What if….?

Katie, on the other hand, broke into a sprint. "Kendall!" She screamed, letting go of Logan, and running forward. "Kendall!" Her voice was high and sounded scared, deadly questions hanging in the silence that came after her screams. Logan watched Katie shove her way into the room, crying and screaming all the way, but he couldn't bring himself to move.

He was too scared. Terrified, really.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

**So, I hope that this chapter was okay :) Check out the next one, that I'll try and post on Friday or Saturday, if you want!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	14. Chapter 14

**Hey guys :) Thank God for the weekend, right? **

**Thanks to all the people who reviewed the last chapter :) You're all so amazing! : **happygirl57, Twisted Illusions, CandySmile, Glee Club Rock 1252, coolchick275, vikwhis13, Anonymous Skrtle, bubzchoc, Californiagirl26, FanfictionRulesMyLife, CountryPeach05, HonoraryLoser, BigTimeLovers14, BSB plus BTR equals HEAVEN, jaydenlover17, MyHeroRaven, MistySorrow, demifan4evr, FreakierThanFreaks, **and the one person who didn't leave a name :D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes :)**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

James couldn't breathe. He was wheezing and struggling to breathe in oxygen, suffering in silence beside Carlos. At least, he thought he was beside his friend - James didn't have the strength to lift his head to check.

And then there were suddenly hands all over him, and within seconds, James had been lifted and moved to a gurney, and was moving fast. He was moaning, a small section of him felt all his pride slipping away, and crying too, if the tears running down his cheeks were anything to go by. Sound had melted away, along with all his energy, and it became impossible to focus on anything but pain and the air that he just wasn't getting.

Just when he thought that he couldn't keep up these rattling breaths, something was shoved onto his face, and breathing became just that little bit easier. Cool air was all around him, and James gulped down deep breaths, not caring if his chest was burning at the movements. He just needed to breathe.

Then the moving stopped, and hands were pressing down on his abdomen and ribs, and he was crying out. His eyes tightly closed, James tensed his body, pain shooting out from his torso as he was poked and prodded.

Someone was asking him loudly to open his eyes, and wondering if his ribs hurt. James wanted to scream _"Of course they fucking hurt!"_, but he was too weary to open his mouth. Suddenly, a fist was rubbing his sternum, and he was jolted back to full consciousness, screaming. He tried to sit up quickly, willing to do anything to make the pain stop, but he was pushed back down before he could get far.

The lights were too bright, the voices too loud, the images too blurry, and the pain too great. Before he finally passed out, he vaguely registered the sound of someone making some kind of high keening noise, like a barely restrained scream. It was only after a few minutes that James realised that he was the one making the noise.

He just had time to think about who was going to look after the guys and Katie if he'd fucked up and hurt himself, and then he blacked out.

/-/-/-/-/-/-

Logan was still standing in the hallway when all the doctors started bustling out. Well, it was more like swaying. It felt like his legs were made of jelly, and like he was standing on a ship far out at sae. Logan had a strong urge to throw up, out of pure fear and anxiety.

He watched all the people spill out of the room, holding his breath and trying hard not to squeeze his eyes shut and pretend that all of this was a nightmare.

But then a bed was manoeuvred out, and suddenly Logan found that he could breathe again. If Kendall was getting taken somewhere, then that at least meant that he was still alive. That meant that everything hadn't crumbled just yet. Katie came barrelling out of the room after everyone, tears streaming down her cheeks, but a huge smile on her face.

Throwing herself gently against a stunned Logan, she started shaking with emotion, "He's waking up," She sobbed, "He's starting to wake up! I s-saw him move his hand…" Katie was practically hyperventilating, pressing her face into Logan's shoulder.

Logan felt all the pressure that had been building up inside him deflate like a balloon. "That's great, Katie," He pulled her closer, and squeezed her tightly. "That's so great. Are they taking him to get scans and stuff done?" He felt her nod her head, not responding as she was too overwhelmed with emotion. "Okay, okay. Let's go find James, and tell him the news, huh? Do you know where he is?"

"H-he's with Carlos," Katie wiped her tears of relief off her face quickly, sniffing loudly before taking Logan's hand. "C'mon, it's just down here."

Smiles on their faces, and hope present in their minds, Katie and Logan shuffled slowly into Carlos' room… Only to find a crying Carlos and no James. Carlos was half curled up on his side, his arms pinned down by his sides, and a pillow wedged uncomfortably between his head and the top of the bed. He was sobbing quietly, his face looking desolate and broken.

"Carlos? Carlos! Are you okay?" Logan ran over, ignoring the pain that it caused him, and bent down so Carlos could see him, "What happened, man? How did—" Then Logan caught sight of the thick restraints and he had to fight back the urge to scream out curses. What had these people done to Carlos?

Without waiting any longer, Logan reached over and tore off the restraints, tossing them out of sight behind him. Carlos immediately curled in even further on himself, whimpering, his hands going up to hid his face. Logan pulled Carlos upright, letting him fall into his arms, and hugged him as tightly as he dared. "Hey, man, hey, it's okay… You're okay now, yeah? I'm not going to let them do that ever again, okay?"

Carlos was groggy in his arms, clearly still fighting off the after effects of a sedative and heavy pain medication, and his voice was cracked and hoarse. Katie silently filled a cup with water from the bedside table, and handed it to Logan, who then held it to his friend's lips and watched as he gulped down a few mouthfuls. Then Carlos' muttered words became clearer.

"Gotta… Gotta help J-James… James! He can't b-breathe… Can't move… Tied down…"

Logan paled. What was Carlos talking about? "Uh, Carlos? Can you, um, tell us what happened?" Logan asked softly, hoping that this was all just a panicked and drug induced nightmare that the Latino had had. Carlos only moaned, and pressed his injured body closer to Logan.

Knowing that he now had to step up and make things right, Logan lowered his friend back onto the bed, and covered him with the blanket, before turning to Katie. "Can you watch him for a few minutes? I'm going to go see if I can find out what's going on." He then strode out of the room, Katie sitting down in the chair beside the bed, and hugging Carlos.

The nurse at the desk looked disinterested as Logan marched up to her, a determined expression on his face. "Can you tell me what happened to James Diamond? I mean, he's okay, isn't he?" His voice cracked slightly at the end of the sentence, his worry seeping out despite Logan's best intentions.

"He's just been taken down to the ER about twenty minutes ago, with breathing troubles, and they're examining him now."

Logan took a moment to let the information sink in, swallowing his anxiety and trying to remain professional. "Um, okay. When will you know what his condition is? And did it look serious when they brought him down?" Logan nodded politely at the nurse when she told him that she didn't know, and that he couldn't do anything at the moment.

"Thank you for your time," He managed to grind out, fists clenched tightly, before he turned around on his heel and made his way to the elevator. Stopping off at his room, Logan painfully dressed in his own clothes, which were left in a pile in the corner of his hospital room.

If James was now hurt, then it was up to Logan to step up his game and play leader for awhile.

He checked again with a nurse on his floor to check that no new information had come on James, and then did the same for Kendall. Nothing new. Logan then made his way over to the cafeteria, picking up a sandwich for Katie using spare change he'd found in his pockets. Heading up to Carlos' room again, he made a quick stop in the bathrooms to wash his face and prepare himself mentally for the next few hours.

Logan had always been pale, but he looked unnaturally pasty in the bathroom light. Splashing water on his face, he took deep breaths and straightened his clothes to try and make them look less crumpled. He pulled his hoodie sleeves down so his cast was covered, even if there was still a noticeable bulge on one of his arms, and tried to make his hair look like he hadn't just been in a car accident and had been in bed since.

When he was satisfied that he looked mildly acceptable, and would be taken seriously by people, Logan left the bathroom, and continued to Carlos' room. He knew that it wouldn't be easy to take on Kendall, and sort of James', role, but he had to at least try.

Logan had to try and be okay for Katie, and there for Carlos, and be strong for Kendall, and be fine for James. Now it was his turn to be there for his three friends, and Katie, and Logan was determined to not screw things up even more.

He could do this.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**So I hope that was okay :) I'll try and get the next chapter up by Wednesday at the latest, so check it out then if you want!**

**Review….?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey****guys****I****hope****you****'****re****all****having****a****good****week!****Thanks****so****much****to****everyone****who****reviewed****the****last****chapter:** Twisted Illusions, jug, coolchick275, shevelle, vikwhis13, happygirl57, bubzchoc, MyHeroRaven, Glee Club Rock 1251, BTRfanficx3, MistySorrow, emmyloser, Epic Duck, HonoraryLoser, CountryPeach05, Anonymous Skrtle, BTR'slovesong, Channylover26, FreakierThanFreaks,**and****the****two****people****who****didn****'****t****leave****a****name****:D****You****guys****are****so****amazing!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.O.O

When Carlos started to feel himself wake up again, he was aware of a warm body pressed into his. His head felt a lot cleared, but he could feel his leg and ribs aching. It was not a good feeling.

Still, he cracked an eye open cautiously, not sure of what sight he would see. Thankfully, the scene around him was not the horror stricken and terrifying one that he remembered waking to the last time he'd regained consciousness. Katie was asleep beside him, snuggled carefully up against his body, clearly needing the comfort of having him close.

Logan was sitting hunched over in the chair nearest the bed. He was in normal clothes, hair sticking up everywhere, and engrossed in several hospital charts. The look on his face was one of pure concentration, making Carlos wary to speak up and get his friend's attention.

"Uh… Logan?" The quiet statement shocked the other boy, Logan practically jumping out of his chair as his eyes looked around frantically, before finally coming to rest on Carlos. Carlos smiled widely.

"Carlos! Oh thank God you're awake, Katie was getting worried. I just, uh— Do you want anything? Water? Pain medication? A hug?" Carlos burst out laughing at the sight of Logan's worried and concerned face, ignoring the fact that his ribs were throbbing because of the movement. "Carlos? What are you doing?" Logan raised an eyebrow at the sight of Carlos laughing, before flipping back through what Carlos assumed was his medical chart, "Do you want me to go get someone—"

"Oh, Logan," Carlos gasped, running a hand though his hair as he tried to control himself, "You have no idea how glad I am to see you right now." Carlos shakily made a fist with his non-IV-ed hand, holding it up to Logan.

Logan grinned back as he bumped fists with his best friend, "You and me both, Carlos, you and me both."

"Has Katie had something to eat yet?" Carlos asked suddenly, glancing around for his clothes, "'Cause I'm pretty sure that I had a couple of dollars in my wallet that she can use to buy some food or something…" He trailed off when he followed Logan's nod and caught sight of the empty sandwich container on the bedside table. "Ew, man, cafeteria food. That's nasty."

"She didn't seem to mind," Logan mused thoughtfully, "I think she ate it more for me than out of hunger, to be honest. Anyway, some nutrition for her can't be a bad thing."

Carlos nodded, looking down at Katie with a sad smile, "So, are the others okay? Did I dream up that something happened to James, or was that real," Carlos' face looked hopeful, "I mean, they've got me on a boat load of drugs right now, so I must have just imagined that something happened, right? Of course James is okay, right?"

Logan didn't answer his friend, gulping slightly and staring at a spot on the wall on the other side of the room. "Logan?" Carlos sounded scared out of his mind, going paler by the second, "Logan? I swear to God that it you don't say something in the next ten se—"

"You didn't dream it." Carlos stiffened at the words, forcing himself not to react too much in case he woke Katie up. "James is down in the Emergency Room. I keep trying to find out what's wrong with him, but they won't tell me anything. I—" Logan's voice broke a small bit, but he continued anyway, "I've been looking at his chart, and the most likely thing that's happened is that he's overexerted himself, and cracked or broken his already bruised ribs. Sounds like something James would do anyway."

Carlos didn't say anything for a moment, trying to compose himself so that he wouldn't freak out on Logan. He forced himself to take deep breaths, his eyes closed and scrunched tightly shut.

"That stubborn bastard. I should have known that he was hiding something…"

Logan figured that it would be useless to tell Carlos to stop beating himself up over James, that he'd been severely injured and drugged up to his eyeballs when the incident had happened, and the fact that he'd done anything at all was amazing. He was about to tell Carlos about Kendall starting to wake up, but held his tongue, not wanting Carlos to get his hopes up in case something else happened.

They talked for a few more minutes, about stupid things like the upcoming science test in the Palm Woods school and ideas for new stunts, saying anything to get their minds off James.

The two teenagers were interrupted by a doctor who knocked on the door softly, and gave Logan a meaningful look, before slipping out again. "Oh, I, uh, I'll be back in a second, okay, Carlos? Just, um, get some rest while I just talk to this doctor, yeah?" Logan then rushed out the door, not even hearing Carlos' cry for him to tell him everything when he got back.

"Are you James' doctor?" Logan gasped, worry and panic evident in his expression.

"No, I'm Kendall Knight's doctor… And shouldn't you be in bed resting like your friend?" Logan froze, he'd been caught.

"I, uh, I'm about to sign myself out. AMA, yeah, I know. Just, my friends need me now more than ever, and I can't do anything for them if I'm stuck in a hospital bed. But you're not here to talk about me, are you? So, what's the deal with Kendall? Please tell me that he's okay…"

The man looked like he was about to argue with Logan, but he studied the teenager's determined face, his eyes almost daring the doctor to challenge him. "I—okay. As you probably know, Kendall was showing small signs of regaining consciousness, a remarkable occurrence – almost unheard of this early on with the type of injury that Kendall received – so we took him to get scans and tests done."

Logan waited nervously, holding his breath. _Please,__please,__please_.

"And they came back very good. Kendall is showing some control of his motor functions, in his hands mostly, and we're hopeful that he will make a full recovery with time." That was all Logan needed to hear, and he had to hold onto the wall to keep himself from sinking to his knees with relief.

As soon as the doctor had finished speaking, Logan was begging to see Kendall, if only just for two minutes, but he just needed to see him. Finally the man agreed, disgruntled, saying that Logan probably wouldn't get a response out of his friend as Kendall was probably worn out, and hadn't even been that responsive to begin with.

But Logan still ran all they way to his room.

Closing the door in the doctor's face, thanking him politely and saying that he wouldn't be too long, Logan breathed another sign of thankfulness. And then he was close to tears, collapsing into the chair beside the bed, and holding Kendall's hand tightly. "Oh God, Kendall, you have no idea how glad I am that you're gonna be okay. I was scared, man— Hell, I still am scared. But as long as you're good, I'm good." A tear escaped from Logan's eyes, "Remember how you used to always say that? That if we were good, you were good?"

Logan bowed his head, touching it gently against Kendall's hand. "I can't wait for you to wake up, man. I need you. I need you the same way Carlos and James and Katie need you. You keep everything normal and in control, and I honestly don't know what we'd do without you."

"So, you, uh, just take your time, okay? Wake up whenever you feel ready, yeah, 'cause I'll be here waiting for you when you do. I'm going to be here for you, Kendall, like all those times that you were there for me. Just— Try not to keep us in suspense for too long, okay? We all miss you."

He lost count of how long he sat there, just talking to Kendall, and reminiscing back on his memories of their childhood. Though he didn't want to admit it, Logan was waiting for a sign. He needed to be sure that his friend actually was going to wake up, needed the reassurance that maybe this nightmare could be coming to an end.

It took an hour, but then it happened. Logan felt Kendall's fingers twitch slightly in his hand. His words died in his throat, and he froze, thinking that he must have imagined it.

But then it happened again. And then, ever so slowly, Kendall's hand curled around Logan's, until he was gripping it weakly. This small movement made Logan dissolve into tears as he held onto that clenched hand, unable to believe that this was really happening.

Kendall was going to be okay.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.O.O

**I hope you guys liked that chapter :) I'll try and post the next one on Saturday, so check it out then if you want! Thanks so much for all the reviews so far, they really motivate me and help me to write the next chapter faster, and I love reading each one of them :D**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	16. Chapter 16

**Hey guys :) Happy Halloween (if you celebrate it!)… on Monday, anyway :) **

**Thanks so much for all the reviews for the last chapter :) You guys are amazing: **BTR'slovesong, bubzchoc, coolchick275, Glee Club Rock, Channylover26, happygirl57, sara303, Anonymous Skrtle, CountryPeach05, Twisted Illusions, FreakierThanFreaks, MistySorrow, SweetPeaKiller, Epic Duck **:D I got some especially motivating reviews this week so thanks a bunch for those!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

When James opened his eyes, severely confused, he was even more surprised to see Logan staring back at him. "Logan?" He asked sleepily, trying to remember what had happened. Last time he'd seen Logan their roles had been reversed - Logan being the one in the hospital bed, and James waiting patiently for him to wake up.

This time though, Logan was dressed in his own clothes, looking alert and concerned, and James was feeling groggy and like he had slept for a million years. His t-shirt had been replaced for a hospital gown, and he could feel a strange kind of tightness around his chest. James was still wearing his worn jeans though, a small comfort in the unfamiliar setting of the hospital.

James could only imagine what his hair looked like right now.

Forcing the horrible images that flew into his mind at the thought of the state of his hair, James forced himself to focus, "What the hell happened?" His voice was hoarse and it was agony to finish the sentence. His chest hurt. Like, really hurt. James winced at the end of his sentence, wondering when exactly everything had stopped making sense. He hadn't gotten hurt in the accident, Logan and the others had.

So why exactly had he and Logan switched places?

"You, um, you overexerted yourself, man," Logan looks borderline angry and almost as if he's about to cry, "You had badly bruised ribs when you came in, and then, like the stubborn idiot you are, you refused pain meds and didn't take it easy at all."

James is about to protest but then he realises that maybe Logan is right. Like always. "But that still doesn't explain—" _Anything. Why you're out of bed, or why I'm this sore, or why—_

Then James realises that the tightness in his chest is due to layers and layers of gauze wrapped protectively around his injured ribs. That explained why it was hard to speak, and why breathing is that bit more of an effort. At least his ribs don't hurt that much when he lies really still, and shallows his breathing.

"I wasn't finished yet. Then, you almost stopped breathing in Carlos' room, just as he was waking up, and he finds you there gasping like a fish or something, and freaks." James tries hard to remember this; he really does, but he's drawing a blank on the whole situation. "And now you're stuck here, with three cracked ribs, one broken one, and a hellva lot of explaining to do."

When Logan makes that face, James realises, he looks almost like Mama Knight, and James is tempted to snigger. But then the stare is directed at James, and he finds himself trying to sink back into the pillow. Logan is scary when he's mad.

"I can explain…" James trails off, and Logan sighs. James realises that Logan actually looks kinda pale, and he's suddenly noticing the cast that Logan has again, and the way he looks weary.

"James! Don't you dare try and get up, you idiot." Logan rolls his eyes as James attempts to get out of the bed, now concerned for Logan, but stops abruptly with the pain. "You're stuck in bed for at least a few days, and you know that you deserve it." Logan's face softens at James' look of horror, and he fishes around in his pocket for something. "Here, I got you this in the gift shop, thought it might amuse you, at least for awhile."

James nearly faints with relief, and lunges for the object. It's a comb. He thinks that he actually might cry from gratitude.

"Oh, Logan, you're a lifesaver. Thank you so much, man, I was freaking out!" Logan smiles slightly, glad that a comb was all it took to satisfy James. He was so predictable.

Just as the friends were about to continue their conversation, Logan's phone started buzzing, and he whipped it out quickly. Reading the text faster that James could ever dream of, he stood up, looking distracted. "Uh, Logan…?"

"Sorry, James, but I've gotta go check on… I—Uh, I'll get back to you as quick as I can, okay? I just…" And then Logan was smiling worriedly at James, already standing and about to leave. Just as quick as the text had come in, Logan was gone. James swore, trying to sit up properly again so he'd feel that little bit less useless, but his ribs felt as if they were on fire, and he just _couldn't_.

"Suck it up," He muttered softly, telling himself that Carlos had properly his broken ribs and a broken leg, and _he'd_ managed to get out of bed, but James had no strength.

He sulked in silence, knowing that he'd brought all of this on himself by not listening to the doctors, but he hadn't had any other options at the time. Katie needed someone to be there for her, the others were all unconscious, and everything had been going wrong. So, yeah, James had gritted his teeth and done everything, riding out the pain with an emotionless mask, while trying not to break down.

But now, stuck in a lonely hospital room wondering about his friends, James wished he'd done things differently.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Logan raced back up the stairs, too wound up to use the lift. He met Katie outside Carlos' room, and swept her into a hug, which she gladly returned. He pushed an energy bar into her hand, feeling his stomach rumble quietly, but ignoring it.

"So I'm going to go see Kendall," Katie's voice broke slightly at the end, her expression hopeful, but also scared, "But I didn't want to leave Carlos alone." She dropped to a whisper, "I'm worried about him. He's acting weird. Well, weirder than normal, and I don't know what to say…" Logan's eyes widened, but he hid his worry from Katie.

"You go and see your brother, okay? I'll, uh, go see what's up with Carlos. I'm sure he's fine though." He leaned down for one last hug. "Text me if you need anything, and I'll come running."

Katie nodded, knowing that Logan would come sprinting if she needed him, and then started off on the long journey down the corridor to Kendall's room. She was scared. Terrified.

"Carlos? You okay, buddy?"

He'd been crying again, that much was obvious. Carlos was curled up on his side, one arm wrapped tightly around his ribs, and big brown eyes looked sadly up at Logan when he spoke.

Logan's heart sunk, and he steeled himself. Don't cry in front of Carlos, he warned himself, you have to be strong for Carlos, not crumble in front of him. He walked cautiously over, not knowing if he was wanted or not. Sometimes when Carlos got upset, he wanted to be left alone. The Latino would isolate himself and block everyone else out, until he finally broke and everything flooded out.

Logan wasn't sure if Carlos was at the blocking out, or the breaking down stage. It was killing him not to know what to do.

Carlos mumbled something, burying his head into the pillow. Logan froze. "What was that, man?" Another muttered sentence, muffled further by the pillow. "Little louder, Carlitos."

"I'm so sorry that I nearly got you killed!" He finally blurted out, tears shining in his eyes, before burying his face back into his pillow. Sobs racked his small frame, and Logan quickly crossed the remaining inches to the bed, and sat on the bed. Carlos sniffled and tried to stop crying, wiping his eyes furiously, but Logan pulled his hands away from his face so he could see him properly.

"Carlos, what the _hell_ are you talking about?"

Logan stared down Carlos, much in the same way that he had done to James ten minutes previously, and it only took a few seconds for Carlos to break. "Its all my fault! If I hadn't been such an idiot and gotten in a fight with James, Kendall wouldn't have switched seats with James and wouldn't be in a coma right now, and we wouldn't have started arguing again in the car, and you wouldn't have gotten distracted, and we wouldn't have gotten hit by that SUV and you wouldn't have broken your arm or gotten a concussion, and we could all be back at the Palm Woods right now if it wasn't for _me_!"

Carlos looked devastated, sobbing apologies even as Logan was pulling him close. "M'sorry, Logan, I'm so sorry… Sorry, sorry, sorr—" Carlos was verging on being hysterical.

"Carlos!" Logan shouted his name loudly, snapping his friend out of his mantra with a start, "Stop apologising! This is not your fault, okay? Not your fault whatsoever. If it's anyone's fault, then its mine, because I was the one driving the damn car. But no one is blaming anyone, okay, least of all you!" Hearing Carlos' squeak of suppressed pain as he hugged him tighter, Logan suddenly frowned, "When are you next due your pain meds?"

"I refused them a few minutes ago." Carlos hurriedly continued at Logan's appalled expression, "I don't want them, Logan! They make me feel all weird, and I don't want them! Please don't make me take them; please don't let them inject me! No needles… Please, please_, please_!"

Carlos was getting worked up again, and Logan could see the terrified panic in his eyes.

So Logan sat there, on the edge of Carlos' bed, holding him tightly in a hug. His could feel Carlos starting to calm down, but only slightly, so he kept holding on, keeping Carlos from freaking out, one second at a time.

Logan prayed that this nightmare would end soon. He didn't know how much longer he, or Carlos, could hold on for.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**I hope you guys liked that chapter :) I'll try and post the next one on Tuesday, so check it out then if you want!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	17. Chapter 17

**Hey guys :) So, I hope everyone had a good Halloween! I stayed over in a friend's house and watched movies all night so I'm actually about to pass out from exhaustion, so sorry if this chapter doesn't make any sense or is kinda bad!**

**Thanks so much for all the reviews from the last chapter :) I love them all, and they really help me to write the next chapter faster! **Epic Duck, Glee Club Rock 1251, Channylover26, coolchick275, bubzchoc, Anonymous Skrtle, HonoraryLoser, BigTimeLovers14, CountryPeach05, Twisted Illusions, My Hero Raven, SweetPeaKiller, happygirl57**…. :D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush.**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Carlos sobbed for what seemed like hours. His body ached, longing the blissful relief the pain meds gave him, but terror struck him each time he remembered being held down and injected. He never wanted to feel like that again. Logan patiently rubbed his back and muttered that it wasn't his fault, but nothing could sway him.

Carlos knew he'd screwed up. Again. His whole life seemed to be just one mistake after another, be it failing his maths exam or causing a fucking car crash that nearly killed all of his friends. His tears stung the stitches on his chin, but that just made him cry harder, the deep cuts yet another reminder of that morning.

God, now he was an ugly screw up too. Without meaning to, Carlos choked out the words, before dissolving into another round of tears and self hatred. But Logan caught him by the shoulders, his gaze turning from a resigned sadness to fresh concern in an instant.

"What did you say, Carlos?"

Carlos sniffed again, rubbing at his face furiously to get rid of the tears, but ended up brushing against some of the cuts which just made him angrier. "I said that now I'm just an ugly idiot!" He screamed, pushing himself away from Logan and his worried face, "Can't you see, Logan? How can my face ever be the same? I'm just going to be a washed up loser with ugly scars, and no friends!"

"Carlos, how could you ever say that?" Logan gasped, horrified at Carlos' cold and resigned words."I— Where the hell did all this even _come_ from?"Logan tried to meet his friend's eyes, but Carlos was staring at his clenched hands, tearstains on his tanned cheeks.

Reaching his hand up to brush lightly against the thick stitches in his face, Carlos had memorized them all by now, he glanced up to Logan. "Well, it's true. I mean, I wasn't that good looking to begin with, but now… And something somewhere along the line is going to tear us apart eventually – Losers like me don't deserve friends like you guys. It was just a matter of time before someone said it out loud."

Logan's face hardened, and he pulled Carlos' hand down roughly from his face. "Carlos, has anyone showed you a mirror since we've been in here?" Carlos shook his head slowly, determined not to meet Logan's eyes again. "Don't move. I'll be back in two minutes."

With that, Logan rose quickly and stormed out of the room, his face angry and determined. Carlos just lay back and stared at the ceiling, too weary to do anything. What was the point anyway? Carlos had known for awhile that this amazing life he'd been living wouldn't last long, and the car accident just proved his point. He couldn't fathom how Logan or James were able to even _look _at him after what he'd done.

Logan practically burst back into the room a few minutes later, dragging an annoyed looking doctor behind him, with a mirror in his hand. Carlos shrunk back into the pillows. His normally quiet and shy friend had fire in his eyes, a look that Carlos hadn't seen since a random guy had stolen Logan's medical book right out of his hands in Minnesota, and Logan had flipped out on him.

Logan looked pissed.

"I don't really have time for this kind of—" The doctor started to say, pulling his arm away from Logan's grip with a grimace of annoyance. Logan whirled around, anger in his eyes.

"Well, I don't really care! Clearly if you were a good doctor, then you would have reassured my friend that his face is going to be _fine_! That there would be no lasting damage, you idiot! And I found you in the doctor's lounge, making out with a nurse, with a big slice of cake beside you, so, yeah; _I think you have time for this_." Logan looked angrier then Carlos had ever seen him, cutting the doctor off mid sentence and glaring.

The man hesitated warily, before clearing his throat quietly, and sidestepping around Logan. "Now, um, Carlos… You're friend here is completely right when he says that there will be no lasting damage to your face. The stitches will be able to come out in a few days, and there will be some scarring, but that will fade with time, provided that the cuts heal well, and don't get infected or reopened."

Logan coughed loudly, and the doctor cleared his throat again, "I will be back to check on you in a few hours, okay, so just, uh, get some rest…" He then walked swiftly out of the room, nodding politely to Logan when he passed him.

The room was then silent, Logan silently handing his friend the mirror he had grabbed from James' bag. Carlos held the object as if it weighed a ton, the mirrored side face so that he couldn't see it. "It's not that bad, man." Logan said softly; ready to run to Carlos if he was needed or back out of the room silently if Carlos wanted to be alone.

"I—" Carlos tested his voice carefully, not wanting to seem weak, "I think that I'd like to be alone for awhile… If that's okay, Logan? Maybe you could go check on Kendall and see how's he's doing?"

Logan nodded sadly, wanting to be there for Carlos, but knowing that he couldn't push Carlos if the younger boy wanted to be alone. "Sure, man. No problem." He gestured to the battered mobile phone on the bedside table, which Logan had fished out of Carlos' bloody jeans earlier, "Call me if you need anything."

And then Carlos was alone, still holding the mirror in his scratched hands.

He was afraid.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Katie jumped with surprise as Logan knocked on the door respectfully, her trance broken. She had been holding her brother's hand tightly, willing him to wake up for her.

But Kendall hadn't moved once since she'd come in, still as motionless and silent as before. "Hey, can I come in?" She nodded with a small smile, glad that Logan was there. He entered the room, looking tired and pale.

It was only when he gave her a hug and she felt the hardness of his cast, that Katie remembered that Logan had been hurt too. Like, really hurt. And while he seemed fine now, taking over all responsibility and making it seem easy as pie, he was probably still hurting. Just like James had been, and now look where James was now.

Laid up in bed with cracked ribs.

Katie buried her head in Logan's shoulder, wanting to cry again, but not sure if she had any more tears left in her. "He isn't moving anymore," She whispered into his soft hoodie. "He won't squeeze my hand, no matter how much I beg him to."

Somehow Logan was able to translate her muffled and quiet sentence, and he stroked her hair softly. "I know it doesn't seem fair, Katie. But he's come a long way today, and he's in there fighting, okay? But Kendall's always been the one who can sleep in for hours – He can almost out-sleep Carlos on the odd occasion – so he'll wake up when he's ready."

"Do— Do you think that he can hear me?" Her broken words almost made Logan start crying, but he held himself together for her, "I-I've been talking to him, but I just…"

"I really do think that he can hear us, Katie. Kendall is in there, and he's fighting to get back to us." Logan placed his forehead on Katie's, and sighed, "Even if he can't remember what we're saying when he wakes us, I'm positive that it'll help him find his way back to us."

This seemed to calm Katie slightly, and she turned back to stare at her brother. "Does mom know?"

"Apparently there's a big storm in Minnesota, so all the power is out for at least a day. None of our parents know. One of the nurses suggested that maybe we go back to the apartment for the night but—"

"No!"

Logan smiled for a split second, "_But_, I told her that you wouldn't want to leave, and had to fight for another option for you. So, they've agreed to bring a little cot thing in here for you to sleep on for tonight at least. But it's gonna have to go in the corner, in case Kendall needs anything in the night, okay?" Katie didn't even say anything, just leaned in for another hug.

They sat like that without exchanging words with each other; Katie curled into Logan's side, while holding her brother's hand gently. His voice quiet, but strong, Logan talked to Kendall.

He talked about the good times that they'd had together, things that they'd do in the future, and most of all: How much they all missed him.

Katie listened to the sound of his voice with her eyes closed, wishing that things would just go back to the way that they used to be – with her brother and his crazy friends messing up their apartment, getting into trouble, making chart-topping albums with Gustavo, and just being there for her, whenever she needed them.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**I hope that chapter didn't suck too much *dies* (I tried to put some more brotherly Logan in there for **happygirl57**!) The next chapter will have James, and Kendall… But you'll have to wait and see whether he'll be awake or not :) I'll try get the next chapter up by Friday, so check it out then if you want :)**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	18. Chapter 18

**Hey guys :) Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! **BTR'slovesong, CountryPeach05, happygirl57, BTRfanficx3, bubzchoc, SweetPeaKiller, soozhearts, Anonymous Skrtle, Twisted Illusions, coolchick275, MyHeroRaven, MistySorrow, FreakierThanFreaks, Honorary Loser… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush.**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

James was bored. He'd managed to lie still in bed for all of about six minutes, before looking around for something to do. The TV was broken, he was alone, and his phone was rapidly running out of battery. _Great._

Not wanting to be a nuisance and ring the call button, James was forced to lie looking up at the ceiling for half an hour until a nurse came in to check on him. With only a few protests, James allowed her to lift up his shirt and prod along his ribcage. The pain was immediate and sharp, and he couldn't stop the grunt of agony that followed her examination.

"I'm sorry, sweetie," She smiled sympathetically, but continued to press into his cracked ribs. James groaned again, resisting the urge to flinch away from her, or cry out in pain. "There, all done."

"I was, uh, wondering when I'd be able to get out of this bed…." Talking hurt, a lot, but James had to ask. He'd only been awake and alone for over an hour, but he was already sick and tired of it. The nurse gave him a disbelieving look, "It's just that I need to make sure that my friends are okay, and, uh, I'm _bored_."

He hadn't meant to put the last part so bluntly, but it came out as being slightly whiney and desperate. "I'm sorry, honey, but not anytime soon… I heard all about that little stunt that ended up with you being in here." She patted his arm gently. "Maybe some of your outside friends could come and visit you tomorrow? Visiting hours start at ten."

And then she walked out of the room, leaving James in indecision. He definitely didn't want anyone from the Palm Woods to see him like this, all pale and weak with his hair in a mess. But on the other hand, Carlos might start to do better if he had people around him.

Thinking of the Palm Woods, James wondered if anyone had even told their friends that they were in the hospital. Or told Gustavo and Kelly for that matter.

He certainly didn't want the job.

God, James wished that his friends were with him. And then he suddenly had an idea. "Nurse? Nurse! Uh, anybody?" He called out, unsure if he was allowed to call someone into his room just to ask them a question. But then he thought of his friends, and kept calling.

Eventually, the nurse that had already been in with him, James didn't know her name, came back in. He gestured her over, and whispered his plan in her ear, giving her an expectant look. "Will that work? 'Cause I think that it would make him feel a hell of a lot better, and he needs to be around someone… Please, can you just run it by someone and see…?"

She smiled at him, and hurried off to run it by his doctors, but told him that it was a _good idea_. James settled back into the bed, exhausted, but unable to slip into sleep for fear of missing something.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Carlos couldn't stop looking. The mirror was shaking in his trembling hands, and his reflection was staring back at him. He looked scared. Carlos' eyes traced the stitches in his face, staring at the black stitches that were clearly visible.

One deep cut across his left cheekbone, another going from his chin and disappearing down his neck. He'd had stitches just above his left eyebrow too, and more again going down the side of his face. Dark bruises blotched his normally tanned but now paler skin as well, his whole right eye blue and purpled, and there were even more cuts that didn't need stitches.

It was scary and horrible, but Carlos could see that Logan was right. Already, most of the minor cuts had started to heal up, and in a week or two, all the bruises would be gone too, and then he would look a bit better.

Still, Carlos couldn't bring himself to put away the mirror.

He studied his bruised and cut face, even though he knew that it probably wasn't good for him to be focusing so much on the state of his face, but it was almost impossible to look away. He just looked so broken.

However once the door to his room opened, Carlos threw the mirror down as if he had been burned, and remained looking down at his hands until the person spoke. "Carlos? Are you okay, honey?" He glanced up, surprised, having being expecting Logan to be back soon. His eyes met ones of a middle aged nurse, and he blushed slightly.

"Yeah, I'm, uh, fine. I'm fine." Carlos said the words firmly, wanting them to be true, and wanting himself to believe them.

The woman looked doubtful. Carlos cracked a fake smile at her. "Well, okay… I'm coming to see if you wanted to move rooms? We've got another patient who'd love the company, and the doctor thinks that it would be good for both of you."

"I… Um…" Carlos hesitated. He didn't _want_ a roommate. But if this other guy really wanted someone to talk to, then maybe it wouldn't be too bad? But what if it was? "I guess that I'm okay with that… But, um, I dunno if I'm going to be able to get out of bed and into a wheelchair…?" His ribs were aching, and he couldn't even move his leg, he was that tired.

A soft chuckle came from the nurse, "Oh, honey, you're okay. There are orderlies outside that are going to wheel you down to the room, okay?" She ducked her head outside to get the orderlies, while Carlos closed his eyes in relief.

Then there was two burly looking men in his room, unlocking the wheels on his bed, and doing various things with the machines and IV drip, and suddenly Carlos was moving. The guy pushing the head of the bed, grinned down at him, saying, "You doin' okay there, kid?"

Carlos managed to give him a weak smile back, aware of how injured he looked now. "Hanging in there," He says hoarsely, getting a wink in return, and Carlos' spirits lift. It's weird, taking the elevator when he's lying flat on his back, but Carlos kind of likes the dropping motion that makes his stomach churn. It's almost like the lame, hospital version of a rollercoaster.

It's then that Carlos comes to the conclusion that he really had to get fully off the pain meds – Though he's refused to take them for the past couple of hours, he was pretty sure that he still had some traces of the drugs in his system.

He realises when he sees the doorframe that he's being pushed into his new room, and he tries to lift his head up so he can see the other guy. But Carlos moves too fast, and the movement jars his ribs too much, and he ends up hissing in pain, and staying flat on his back. The orderly glances down, a concerned look on his face, but looks back up without saying anything when he sees Carlos' expression darken with the sight of pity.

The other person in the room, however, can't keep his mouth shut, "Crap, are you okay, man?"

Carlos is just about to scowl and say that _yes, he's fine, and will that guy please just mind his own business_, but then he realises what's familiar about the voice. "James?"

And then no amount of pain can keep him down, and Carlos struggles up on elbow to make sure that it really was his friend. Through the momentary haze of pain, Carlos can see James, and a huge smile splits his face.

"You know it, buddy… Guess who your new roommate is!"

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Logan woke up to the feeling of something poking his arm gently. He groaned, too tired to open his eyes, and then he smelt the antiseptic in the air – _Hospital_— and snapped his eyes open.

Katie was fast asleep beside him, pressed into his side, so that wasn't what had woken him. Then Logan realised who was prodding him slightly.

"Kendall!" The teenager in question had his eyes open wide, though he looked groggy, and his index finger was poking Logan. "Kendall," Logan repeated in disbelief, "Are you okay?" It was a stupid question, but one that just slipped out, over all the other things Logan was dying to ask.

"I…" He wheezed his throat too dry to make any sounds. Logan gently got up, trying to make sure Katie stayed asleep, which she did, and rushed to get a cup of water. Holding it up to his friend's mouth, Logan tried to control his breathing. He needed to be there for Kendall, not to freak out about how amazing it was that he was awake.

"W-Wh-at… Ha-happened…?" Kendall could barely talk, but he managed to grate out the words.

"I'll explain everything in a bit, okay? Just know that you're okay, I'm okay, and so are the others." Logan thought that it might be better to wait before overloading everything onto Kendall. "But for the meantime, there's someone who's been waiting for you to wake up." With that, Logan nudged Katie, and gestured to her brother when her eyes opened.

The look on Katie's face when she saw her brother awake and somewhat coherent made Logan's day.

Things were going to be okay.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**Hope you guys liked that chapter! I'll try and get the next one up by… Monday?**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	19. Chapter 19

**Hey guys :) I am so so so sorry that this chapter is a week late! I feel so horrible, but I'm doing this thing called NaNoWriMo, where you have to write a 50k novel in 30 days (and I started late!), so I've been so stressed with that. I'm like behind on everything that I could possibly be behind on :0 Are any of you guys doing it?**

**Thanks so much for all the reviews for the last chapter! **SweetPeaKiller, jaydenlover17, Twisted Illusions, colchick275, hapygirl57, HonoraryLoser, TheWritingFreak, soozhearts, jug, CountryPeach05, FreakierThanFreaks, FanfictionRulesMyLife, MistySorrow, Anonymous Skrtle, Glee Club Rock 1251, MyHeroRaven, bubzchoc, Channylover26, Lito-Arumi… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush… Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

It had been seven hours. Seven hours since Carlos and James had started sharing a room together, and James could already see a huge difference in his friend. A good difference.

Carlos wasn't looking so pale anymore, and he'd even let James talk him into taking a small dose of pain meds, so his face wasn't scrunched up in that strained expression anymore. Well, it was when he moved, but it was still a huge improvement. He couldn't talk much though, because of his broken ribs, so James sucked it up and kept the conversation running, telling himself that his ribs were only cracked, and therefore much less painful than Carlos'.

The younger boy had a habit of drifting off to sleep when James was in the middle of talking too, but James didn't mind. When that happened, he would simply just smile at an innocent looking Carlos, and start reading a magazine until Carlos woke up again.

Thankfully, it seemed to have taken a lot of pressure off Logan as well, as he was no longer divided between three rooms, and knew that James and Carlos could watch over each other, and make sure that they were okay. Logan now alternated between sitting with Katie and Kendall, and checking up on his other two best friends.

James had felt a huge pressure lift off his chest when he'd heard that Kendall was waking up. Logan had told him happily a few minutes after Carlos had drifted off to sleep, so James had had to keep his excitement down. He'd settled for gripping Logan's hand tightly, a relieved look on his face, while Logan smiled back at him. It had been one of the best moments of James' life.

When Carlos had jerked back awake, James had told him, and Carlos had started crying. James, not expecting the other boy to burst into tears, went to get up and comfort him, but stopped at the sight of Carlos' hand that he held up, "No, James. Don't get out of bed. I just— This is happy crying. I— Thank God…"

Carlos had then cried for another ten minutes, before falling asleep again.

The next time Logan had come in, James had quietly asked him if it was normal that Carlos couldn't seem to stay awake for more than two hours, but Logan assured him that it was just because of his injuries and the fact that he was still very weak. That hadn't exactly made James feel a lot better either, but it was better than nothing.

It was only after he'd flipped through the now worn magazine a million times that James remembered to turn on his phone. When the screen finally came to life with a bright flash, the messages came flooding through. His phone vibrated for a full five minutes, the message counter going steadily upwards along with the missed calls icon.

"Oh shit."

He had ten messages and seven missed calls from Kelly, along with the twenty four messages and thirteen missed calls from their friends at the Palm Woods. James only clicked into a few of them, but from the looks of it, people were really worried. Camille had started crying on the phone, begging them to just come home (she'd assumed they'd run away or something), and that was when James vowed not to listen to anymore voice mails.

Checking to make sure that Carlos was still asleep, James hesitantly dialled Kelly's number and waited for her to pick up. He focused on Carlos' sleeping form, his cut face looking especially vulnerable in sleep. Then Kelly picked up. "_James_? James, is that you?"

"Hey, Kelly," James started off awkwardly, "So… How've you been?"

"Worried sick looking for you! The police wouldn't start searching for you boys until a few hours again because they had to wait for twenty four hours! Where are you?"

James gulped – Kelly sounded pissed. "I can explain—"

"You'd better have a damned good excuse! You've been missing for just over a day, and I just—" Then a voice shouted loudly in the backround, and all James heard was '_Tell me that it's my dogs on the other end of that line!_'

"We're in the hospital." He blurted out bluntly, and waited for the explosion. But all he could hear through the phone was a gasp, and then the sound of breathing. "Um, guys? You still there? I'm so sorry, and I swear that I can explain everything, but we are all just so sorry, and I swear that it will never happen again, and we'll make it up to you, Gustavo, and work really hard until we can make up for—"

"James!" Kelly interrupted, and he heard the phone click to speaker mode, "Did you say that you boys are in the hospital? What happened? Are you all okay? Is Katie with you? No one could find her either."

James took a deep breath, licking his dry lips before continuing, "Well, uh, there was a bit of an accident on the way to the studio, and we got hit by a SUV," There was a huge gasp from Kelly at this, "And then by a truck. And now we're stuck in the hospital. So, um, we're really sorry for worrying you both. It won't happen again. Oh, and Katie's here with us, yeah."

Surprisingly it was Gustavo who spoke first. To Kelly he said, "Call a cab. _Now_." And then he spoke to James. "How hurt are you boys? We're on our way right now, okay?"

"Logan has a broken arm, and had a concussion. Carlos has a broken leg, broken ribs, and he cut up his face pretty badly," Understatement of the century. The next part was harder to say. "And, um, Kendall, he, uh, was in a coma until, like, nine hours ago… But he's waking up. I think. They won't let me out of bed."

"What's wrong with you, James?"

The concern and worry in the producer's voice shocked James for a moment, and then he backtracked, "No, I mean, I'm fine… Really, I hardly got hurt at all." Gustavo waited for the rest, "Just, uh, cracked a few ribs. Will be right as rain and ready for singing in a few days— I promise."

Gustavo seemed to stifle a sigh, and then he spoke again. "Okay. Well, we're leaving now, and are going to be there as soon as possible. What room are you in?"

James told him, and then hung up the phone, wrapping an arm around his chest. That had been tiring. He glanced down at his phone again, and groaned loudly, running a hand though his hair as he realised that he would now have to ring Camille, and assure her that they hadn't run away. Then she could spread the news to the rest of the Palm Woods.

Five minutes later, a hysterical Camille had been calmed down, and James had persuaded her not to come down to the hospital. "No, you really don't have to come today… Maybe tomorrow if you really wanted? Just that Carlos is wiped and needs lots of rest, and Gustavo and Kelly are already on their way here, and I don't want to crowd Kendall or hassle Logan… Okay, thanks so much for understanding… Yes, I'll get Logan to ring you as soon as I can… Okay, Camille, love you too… Bye…"

Carlos blinked sleepily up at James as he woke up again, and painfully lifted his hand up to rub at his face. James winced for his friend as Carlos cringed in pain when he brushed against one of his cuts, and wished that he could jump up and comfort his friend.

"You okay, buddy?"

The Latino nodded gloomily, now staring at the cast that encased his entire leg from hip to toes. "How long do I have to keep this cast on for, James? This sucks so much; I won't be able to do anything for _ages_!"

"I dunno, Carlitos… Probably for awhile at least. But, hey, that means that you get to laze around on the couch for ages, and watch TV, and play video games, and boss all of us around!"

Carlos brightened instantly, grinning widely at James. Maybe things weren't so bad after all, Carlos thought happily, if he got to boss his friends around and make them get things for him! But then everything started hurting again, and his smile faded, bring James' with it.

James racked his brain for something, anything, to get Carlos looking happier, and to get the horribly sad look off his face. "Uh… Gustavo and Kelly are coming into see us in few minutes!" It worked, and Carlos immediately looked better. He gave James that look that urged him to continue, "And, um, Camille said that she'd come in tomorrow… I can text her to bring in stuff if you want?"

"My helmet!"

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**Hope that chapter was okay :) I'm going to try and have the next chapter up by no later than Saturday, but your reviews would really motivate me and push me to write it by then! Sorry for the wait again…**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading, **

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	20. Chapter 20

**Hey guys! Here I come… Bringing yet another late update again— I really am so sorry! NaNoWriMo (and just life in general to be honest!) have been kicking my ass, but I was determined to post this tonight :) **

**Thanks****to****all****the****reviewers****of****the****last****chapter!****You****guys****are****amazing****:**Twisted Illusions, CountryPeach05, TheWritingFreak, freakiecutiecarlos, bubzchoc, MerrilyWeFallx, Glee Club Rock1251, SweetPeaKiller, jug, Anonymous Skrtle, coolchick275, happygirl57, soozhearts, RuneMidnight, FreakierThanFreaks, MyHeroRaven, Robin-n-Hoodie, FanfictionRulesMyLife… :**D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush… Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Gustavo burst through the door, red faced and worried looking, Kelly right behind him. "Dogs?" He yelled the second before he got into the room, making James and Carlos look up quickly and smile.

"Reporting for duty!" James replied with a smile, grinning up at Gustavo when he looked over to see James half sitting, half lying in a mostly upright position on the hospital bed. He waved at the producer with his hand with the IV in it, forgetting about the tubing, and then had to hastily put his hand back down. "It's good to see you, Gustavo."

Kelly and Gustavo made their way over to James' bed, both shocked at the state of the teenager, and then Carlos spoke up, "N-no love for Carlitos then?" He said jokingly in a hoarse voice, and then immediately started coughing painfully, one arm wrapped around his ribs because of the pain. At the sound of his voice, Kelly and Gustavo whirled around, and then had to swallow down gasps.

"Carlos…" Kelly trailed off, stepping closer to the Latino. His bed was slightly more horizontal than James' but he was still partly sitting, his casted leg propped up on several pillows. The cuts on his face were very noticeable as he smiled sheepishly at them, his face slightly strained and pale. Carlo's hospital gown was too big for him, and the small section of gauze that could be seen that was wrapped around his chest was obvious to anyone who looked at him.

It was only when he saw Kelly's and Gustavo's shocked expressions that James realised how broken Carlos still looked.

Luckily, Kelly recovered quickly, and said, "Oh, Carlos, we heard what happened! How are you, sweetie?" She made her way over to him, and pulled up a chair to sit in, Gustavo then slowly sitting down next to James in a daze.

Carlos beamed at her, "I'm fine," He said cheerfully, and let Kelly hug him very gently. "How are you? Carlos asked this in a normal tone, as if it was a regular Monday morning and he'd just arrived into the studio after the weekend. "Oh, and do you have a marker by any chance?"

"I'm good, Carlos, I'm good. I was worried about you boys, but now things are okay again." Kelly said while she rummaged in her handbag for a few minutes, Carlos watching her expectantly. James frowned, confused, wondering why the _heck_ Carlos was looking for a marker of all things. But then James' eyes landed on his friend's big cast, and he realised. _Oh_ _Carlos_.

Kelly surfaced from her big bag with a plain black marker in her hand, and a slightly bewildered look on her face, "Got one. Not sure why or how I have a marker in my bag, but I do. Here you go, Carlos." She went to hand it to Carlos, but he shook his head, and she paused.

"Do you want to sign my cast, Kelly?" Carlos asked with a hint of excitement, as if he was afraid that Gustavo's assistant would no. Kelly smiled widely, and said of course, and Carlos watched with a look of excitement as she went about writing on his cast. "Thanks!" Then Carlos hesitated, and glanced over to Gustavo, "Do you, uh, want to sign the cast too, Gustavo…?"

Gustavo could only nod, still shocked by the state of one of his dogs, but got up and walked over to where Kelly was just finishing her message. "Um, sure, Carlos." He tried to smile at the Latino, though it may have come out as more of a grimace, and then held his hand out for the marker.

James and Carlos shared a look of surprise at Gustavo's niceness, and just general un-Gustavo-ness. He hadn't even yelled once. Who knew that all they had to do to get Gustavo to be nice was to get in a car accident on the way to the studio? James had been expecting their producer to come charging in, and let rip at them all for not being on time, and getting hurt, which meant that they wouldn't be able to rehearse for a while, especially Carlos if he was going to be on crutches for a long time.

But surprisingly, none of that had happened so far. Who knew Gustavo, of all people, had a heart?

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Kendal drifted in and out of consciousness over the space of a few hours. Sometimes when he woke up, there would be strange people surrounding him, their voices loud and intrusive, and it made Kendall feel scared and confused. The doctors would hover over him, shouting down at him to see if he could blink twice or squeeze their hand, or say a few words, or something else just as confusing and random.

But then most of the time when he opened his eyes, Logan and Katie would be there, sitting patiently in the chairs beside his bed, and smiling like he'd just made their day every time they saw that he was awake.

Kendall really had no idea what on earth was going on.

When he woke up again for what must have been the millionth time, but not really, Kendall was relieved to see that Logan was beside him. Logan was slumped in the chair, looking like he was about to fall asleep, and he looked so tired that Kendall was reluctant to get his attention. But he had to find out what had happened, and where the others were.

Kendall kind of half grunted, half moaned – His throat was just so _dry_!— and just that small noise in itself had Logan almost jumping off the chair, and looking ecstatic when he stared at Kendall. Kendall tried to smile back at his friend, but all that he could focus on was the bags under Logan's eyes, and the bruise on his forehead, and the cast on his arm, and he found himself wondering if Logan was the one who should be in the hospital bed, and not him.

He opened his mouth to speak, but no noise came out, and Kendall let out a cracked squeak. He couldn't speak. Why couldn't he speak? How was he supposed to ask Logan anything if he couldn't even get one little word out?

Logan noticed Kendall's distress though, and produced a small cup of ice chips from behind him, which he helped Kendall put in his mouth. Kendall had to suppress a yawn at the sheer effort of sucking the ice, and then was immediately worried at how weak he was. That couldn't be normal. Surely sleeping couldn't suck that much energy from him in such a short space of time.

"W-wh-ats… goin'… o-on?" Kendall managed to rasp out after a few minutes, and paled at the sight of Logan's face, which switched from concern to dread. Kendall felt himself getting colder. "J-James… Car-los…"

Logan snapped out of it, and hastily said, "Oh, no, Carlos and James are okay I swear. They're a bit sore and bruised, but okay. Do you remember having this conversation before?" Kendal shook his head, scared. "That's okay. You're fine, man, but the doctors warned that you might have some trouble remembering our conversations. You woke up about an hour ago as well, and asked me the exact same thing, and the same again twenty minutes ago."

Kendall tried to make sense of everything, but he was coming up with nothing. Just as he was about to ask what had happened, Logan smiled and started talking, obviously anticipating his question. "We were in a car accident, Kendall. On our way to the studio yesterday. But everyone is going to be fine, and things are going to be back to normal soon. And yes, before you ask, I'm okay too. Just a bit tired."

A smile broke out on Kendall's face as Logan took the words right out of his mouth, and answered his next question. Clearing his throat to try and make talking easier, he then said, "Guess I-I've… been sleep-sleeping enough… for b-both of us.. huh?" Kendall joked weakly. It was hard to talk, and Kendall was constantly having to stop and try to catch his breath and try to moisten his already dry lips.

Logan stared for a second, and then burst out laughing. "Yeah," He said, a genuine smile on his face, "Yeah, I guess you have been, man. You and Carlos both, James keeps telling me that Carlos is constantly falling asleep in the middle of their conversations. You two were always the lazy ones!" Kendall grinned back at his friend, suddenly feeling weary again, his eyelids slipping closed against his will before he forced them open again. "It's okay, Kendall, you can go back to sleep. I'll still be here when you wake up again."

So Kendall did fall back asleep, feeling much better than he had when he'd woken up. The drugs that were still in his system to numb the pain from his pounding head were strong, so Kendall was asleep within a couple of seconds.

Everything would be fine, and Logan would be there waiting until he woke up again…

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**I hope that chapter was okay :) I'm going to work really hard to get the next chapter up between Wednesday—Friday, so keep an eye out for it if you want (reviews totally get me off my lazy ass and writing, just so you know!) Sorry for the lateness, yet again :0**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	21. Chapter 21

**Hey guys :) I know it's been ages since I've updated this story, and I am so sorry, but NaNoWriMo is finished, the countdown to Christmas is on, and I am back!**

**Thanks so much to all the reviewers of the last chapter :) You guys are all so amazing: **Twisted Illusions, bubzchoc, Robin-n-Hoodie, Elevate, happygirl57, CountryPeach05, NoctePluvia, kariina55, jug, Glee Club Rock 1251, Anonymous Skrtle, jaydenlover17, MyHeroRaven, SweetPeaKiller, TheWritingFreak, soozhearts, Channylover26, FreakierThanFreaks… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush… Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

God, he was _tired_. Logan wearily entered Carlos' and James' hospital room, and cringed slightly as Kelly and Gustavo immediately looked over at him. He tried to smile, but he was so exhausted that Logan was pretty sure that he looked like a zombie.

"Shh…" James peered around Gustavo, and pointed at Carlos, "He fell asleep again," Logan glanced towards Carlos' bed, and rolled his eyes as he saw his best friend snoring softly with his mouth slightly open. Typical Carlos, he looked the exact same as he would if he had conked out on the orange sofa in their apartment.

Logan then crept quietly over to James' bed, and let Kelly envelop him in a hug. Gustavo gave him a slightly awkward handshake that ended with both Logan and Gustavo avoiding each other's eyes, as the producer said, "I'm, eh, glad you dogs are okay." Logan rubbed at his cast absentmindedly as he and Gustavo released their grips, having not been expecting Gustavo to engage in any kind of physical contact.

"Thanks for coming, guys; I'm sure Carlos really liked seeing you." Logan said as he hi fived James, smiling as he sat down in the chair beside James' bed. "So, um, Kendall's going to be okay," James beamed at this and went to get out of bed, "Hey, what are you doing, man?"

James looked slightly sheepish and defensive, "Well, I gotta go see him… I've been in bed for, like, a whole day, so I'm pretty sure that I'm good to go now." He flashed a winning smile at Logan, who just looked back skeptically at him.

Then Kelly cut in, and went to go towards the door, "Why don't I get a nurse in here, and we can ask her if James is up to walking around?" Logan nodded gratefully at her, and Kelly only smiled slightly at the put out look on James' face. "Okay, I'll be back in a few minutes. Here, Gustavo, why don't you run to the vending machines and get Logan here some food? He looks hungry."

Logan blushed, and then his stomach promptly rumbled. Their producer quickly hurried out the door after Kelly, probably desperate to get out of the awkward situation that he hadn't ever been expecting. Once they were both gone, Logan and James looked at each other, and both burst into laughter, the situation hilarious to them.

"Dude, I don't think that I've ever seen Gustavo that nervous before— Not even in front of Griffin!" James wheezed out in between laughs, his chest aching, but his body unable to stop laughing. Logan tried to stop laughing for a few moments, but then pictured Gustavo's almost pained look when he had been shaking his hand, and then erupted into chuckles again.

They were interrupted by a nurse who knocked politely on the door, and then came in, smiling as she heard the two friends laughing. "I'm sorry, boys, but do you mind if I just come in real quick, and check James out?"

It was hard to stifle down their laughter, but they both managed to, James losing all traces of a grin the moment that the nurse started to press down along his torso. He hissed in pain, turning his head away so that Logan wouldn't be able to see the look of agony on his face, but he was too late in doing so, and Logan caught a glimpse of his pained expression, and his heart sank.

Logan had to force himself not to wince as well, when he saw the extensive bruising that James had on his torso, deep purples and blues that splattered all across his chest, and Logan wasn't sure how James was sitting up and talking still, let alone wanting to get out of bed.

"I'm sorry, honey, one more minute," The nurse said softly, in an attempt to calm James down. Thankfully, she stayed true to her word, and was soon pulling James' hospital gown back down to cover his chest, and tucking the covers back up, "Well, things are looking good, James. I don't want you to go running all around the hospital again when I say this, but I think that it would be okay for you to maybe start walking a bit, provided that the pain is manageable."

At this, the injured teenager grinned, all traces of pain gone from his face. But then just as he was about to get, slowly, out of bed, a voice piped up from the other side of the room, "I want to get out of bed too."

All the other occupants of the room turned to stare at a slightly groggy Carlos who had just woken up, and he raised a hand to wave at them, "Please? I've been stuck in this bed for days, and I just want to get out. Even if I have to go in a wheelchair or something, I'll do whatever. Just— Please?" Carlos cast a desperate look at the nurse, who looked unsure, but picked up his chart from the end of his bed anyway.

James closed his eyes briefly, not wanting to remember the last time that Carlos had gotten out of bed. It had ended in disaster, and it was not an experience that James ever wanted to relive. He and Logan stared at the back of the nurse, and tried to judge her reaction, but it was hard, considering that her face was hidden. The hopeful look on Carlos' face looked promising though.

"Well…" The nurse drew out the word, biting her lip while she considered the possible outcomes, "I guess it would be okay… But not for longer than a half an hour, and you have to remain in the wheelchair that I'll have an orderly bring in at all times. Understood?" Carlos nodded eagerly, beaming at Logan and James, who both smiled nervously at him, "And any pain that seems unmanageable, you tell someone right away, and we'll get you straight back to bed."

Carlos looked quite put out by this condition for a second, but then his face cleared, and he nodded. "Guys, this is going to be so awesome! It's like a field trip!" Logan had no choice but to smile at this, and then he looked up to see Gustavo and Kelly entering the room again.

"I think that we should go for now," Kelly said with a smile directed towards an excited Carlos, "But you call if anything, and I mean anything, happens, and we can be here. I'll call to check in with you boys tonight, or maybe tomorrow because you all look wiped, but don't hesitate to call, okay?" All three boys nodded seriously, not wanting to worry Kelly again— She could be scary when she got worried.

"Uh, what she said," Gustavo said lamely, and then waved at the friends, "And get well soon, because we have a lot of work to do in the studio," Kelly elbowed his sharply, and he quickly added, "But not until you're all ready. Um, bye."

They all watched, mouths slightly open, as their producer then scuttled out the door, but not before throwing a sandwich and a wad of cash into Logan's arms. Then the door was closed, and they were alone. "Guys, there's like a hundred dollars here," Logan broke the silence by putting the sandwich down, and counting the notes, "Who carries a hundred bucks around, in their pockets?"

Carlos laughed, ignoring the pain in his ribs, and shifted slightly in his bed. "Oh, man, I really have to get out of this bed," He said with a smile, "My butt's totally asleep." This prompted grins from both Logan and James, who swung his jean clad legs over the side of his bed. "Hey, why did you get to keep your jeans on?" Carlos asked, outraged.

"Because I don't have a huge cast on my leg, that's why, Carlitos," the brunette replied, accepting Logan's hand to help him up. Once he was on his feet, the world started to spin, and it took a few seconds before James could see straight again. Logan then rolled the IV pole towards James, and showed him how to hold onto it, so that he could just it as a support while he walked.

By then, an orderly was wheeling a wheelchair into the room, and Logan and James looked away as the man helped Carlos into the chair. They heard the barely stifled moan of pain, but knew that Carlos wouldn't want them to see him when he was so weak.

When they looked back, Carlos was sitting upright in the wheelchair, his casted leg extended out straight on a support that the wheelchair had built in. He looked pale, and maybe a little green, but he was still smiling, and that was all that mattered. James shuffled out the door alongside Logan, who was pushing Carlos, and looked up and down the halls.

"To Kendall's room!" Carlos cried, pointing a finger in the direction of the elevator.

Logan obeyed, and the battered trio headed in the direction of the lift. He smiled to himself, when he pictured the ICU staffs' faces when they made their way out of the elevator, and marched into Kendall's room.

Because, however battered and bruised and tired they were, they were like brothers, and nothing was going to stop them from going in to see Kendall.

_Nothing._

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

**So there's another chapter down :) I will try and get the next one up by Sunday at the latest (and I mean it, cause my updating has really sucked lately) so check it out then if you want!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	22. Chapter 22

**Hey guys :) I hope your all having a great weekend!**

**Thanks so much for all the reviews that I got this week :) You guys are all so amazing: **amrice101, Channylover21, GhostGirlMD (**for all your reviews! *smiles*)**, puppylove98162** (Thanks as well for all your awesome reviews!)**, Glee Club Rock 1251, NoctePluvia, jug, soozhearts, CountryPeach05, Twisted Illusions, Anonymous Skrtle, jaydenlover17, BigTimeLovers14, MyHeroRaven, TheWritingFreak, SweetPeaKiller, FreakierThanFreaks, happygirl57, bubzchoc, BTR'slovesong… :D

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Kendall can hear voices. They sound hushed and familiar, and he's pretty sure that someone is sitting on the side of his bed.

And then Carlos, it _has_ to be Carlos, blurts something out loudly, and Kendall struggles to open his eyes. Carlos is shushed loudly, and Kendall can clearly picture the apologetic and sheepish look on his face.

Sure enough, when his eyes finally open, and he looks in the direction of where the voice had come from, Carlos is smiling shyly at a tired looking Logan, whose sitting on Kendall's bed, and James, who looks pale, is sitting straight up in the chair beside his bed, holding his ribs with one arm.

Kendall shakes his head slightly to get rid of the blurredness, and catches his friends' attention. "Kendall!" Carlos shouts excitedly in a hoarse voice, and leans forward quickly to get a better look at him. But Logan makes this kind of worried squeak that he does sometimes, and pushes Carlos back into his chair. Kendall squints at it. Or wait... Is that a wheelchair?

Then Kendall looks closer, and realises that Carlos is in a wheelchair that's parallel parked beside his bed, so that the Latino can get as close as possible. He takes in the big cast, from Carlos' hip right down to his toes, and then has to force himself not to stare for too long at Carlos' face.

When he tries to remember, which he has to because Carlos has painful looking cuts all over his face, and Kendall has no idea how that happened, he is scared to admit that he doesn't know. "I can't—" He starts to say, but then stops and waits until he can be sure that he can say his sentence without his voice cracking or sounding weak at all, "I don't know how…" He trails off with a helpless look on his face.

James goes even paler, which Kendall didn't even think was possible, and looks like he's about to throw up. Carlos switches from looking excited and happy to confused and scared in the space of a second.

Logan though, leans forward from his position on the side of Kendall's bed, and Kendall can see that he's trying to dial down his concerned face, so as not to scare him. "We were in a car accident, remember, Kendall?" Logan asks softly, and his pale blue eyes search Kendall's. "You hit your head pretty hard, and—"

And then Kendall is shaking his head again, looking confused. "Yeah. I remember that." They all look instantly better, and then seem to deflate, as if the worry gave them a burst of adrenaline, but it's long gone. Well, all of them except Carlos, who still looked confused.

"But, Carlos… What happened to your face? And why are you in a cast?"

James looks like he's about to say something, but can't quite get the words out, while Logan struggles and stutters for something to say. "Oh, _this_? Yeah, it looks bad. I know. The glass from the window cut me when we crashed, and then my leg was broken because the car smashed into my side of the car," The blunt statement of the facts shocked a still groggy Kendall into silence, and he kept listening, "Oh, and I broke some ribs 'cause of my seatbelt. Why… Why weren't you wearing _your_ seatbelt, man? You would have been fine if you had been."

"I—" Kendall was unprepared for his friend's question, and he looked around to see James and Logan's equally as heartbroken and curious faces, "I thought… I thought that maybe I would be able to save you guys."

Then he looked down and studied the sheets on the bed, embarrassed somehow.

A hand lands softly on his shoulder, and he looks up to see Logan smiling back at him. "Thanks, man. It was a stupid idea, and I really don't want you to try it ever again, but thanks."

"Same here," James says, and reaches out his fist. Kendall taps James' outstretched fist with his own, and they both try to ignore how weak they are. Katie gestures to Logan from over by the door, and he waves at his sister, just as Logan goes over to her. Kendall watches as his friend takes a few notes away from the wad of cash that he randomly has in his pocket, and hugs her goodbye.

"I'm just going to go back to the apartment and get a few things if that's okay?"

Kendall smiles at his sister, "Of course, Katie. And get a couple of hours sleep while you're there, you look exhausted. And don't forget to eat something relatively healthy, and just… be safe." She laughed for a moment at his over-protectiveness, and then disappeared out the door.

Then there was silence for a few seconds, before Carlos asked loudly, "Where the hell did you get all that money, Logan?" Logan, who was just stuffing the bills in his pocket looked up and smiled at James.

"Gustavo."

Kendall nodded absentmindedly, until he frowned, "Wait, what? _Gustavo was here_?"

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

The conversation flowed in the small room, all four boys joking and laughing, despite their various injuries and the circumstances. Kendall would occasionally get a bit groggy and drift off to sleep, but when that happened, they just lowered their voices. Kendall would soon jerk back awake, and quickly rejoin their conversation.

A couple of times a nurse came bustling in, but when that happened, Kendall would fake sleep, Logan would grab his hand and look sad, James would stare sadly out the window, and Carlos would look at the nurse with those puppy dog eyes that he had perfected over the years. "Please," He'd let the words slip out with just the right amount of emotion to seem devastated, "J-Just five more minutes…?"

This would work like a charm every time, and they'd all exchange grins and keep talking until the next time the door was opened, and the whole cycle would start again.

Their luck didn't last forever though, and finally the nurse that Carlos had persuaded to let him get out of bed stormed in. Kendall shut his eyes quickly, thinking that it was just an ordinary nurse like the other times, but the other three froze. "Um…" Carlos started to say something, most likely do his part in their little role-play that they had devised, but trailed off.

"Boys!" The nurse scolded, marching up to the bed, and unlocking the wheels of Carlos' wheelchair. "I told you that you had half an hour— at most— and its already been over three hours!"

The woman checked a guilty Carlos' pulse by placing her two fingers on the inside of his wrist, and then went around to Kendall and did the same thing. James shook his head quickly as she turned to him, so the nurse rolled her eyes, and then helped him stand. Logan went to stand up too, but James gestured for him to sit back down, saying, "You can stay here with Kendall, man. That one," He jerked a thumb towards Carlos, "Will probably sleep when we get back to our room, so you should stay and keep Kendall company."

Carlos looked like he was about to protest, but then he nodded sheepishly. "… Yeah, James is probably right. I'll see you tomorrow, Kendall!"

At this point, the nurse was wheeling him out, a look of frustration on her face, but Carlos had turned around, and was waving back at Kendall and Logan. James laughed slightly at his friend, and then followed him out, shuffling along with his IV pole.

They were quite a pair; Kendall had to admit with a grin. One smiling laughing Latino in a wheelchair who was currently telling his favourite bad jokes, and another tall brunette in a hospital gown, jeans, and bare feet behind him. _Only my friends…_

And then, they were gone down the corridor, and the sound of Carlos' laughs and loud jokes eventually faded. Logan moved to one of the chairs, slumping down in it, and pulling up another chair to rest his feet on, gratefully accepting a pillow from Kendall. While it was funny to see Logan have such a routine with the chairs, it scared Kendall slightly that his friend had had enough time to get to know the most comfortable way to lie on hospital chairs.

"Do you think Carlos and James are going to be okay?"

Logan glanced over at Kendall, and gave him a reassuring smile, "Of course they'll be okay, man. They've got each other, and now that you're awake again, things are really starting to look up."

Kendall nodded, and mused over Logan's words. He hadn't realised it before, but it must have been incredibly hard for all three of his friends, and especially Katie, while he'd been in a coma.

Thank God he'd been able to wake up.

As he was thinking hard about all of this, and feeling guiltier and guiltier by the second, Kendall's felt his eyes begin to grow heavier. He pushed his tiredness out of his mind, and struggled to focus, and continue his conversation with Logan, "So, I—" He yawned loudly, "I, um, was out for, um…" Kendall rubbed at his eyes in frustration, trying to not seem tired. "… Um, two da—"

It was only after his second giant yawn in the space of a few seconds that Logan rolled his eyes, got up, and pushed Kendall back down on his bed gently. "Go to sleep, Kendall. You're exhausted."

Logan then settled back into his makeshift bed, made of a pillow and hospital chairs, and closed his eyes. "Night, Kendall."

"Goodnight, Logan."

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**I hope you all liked that chapter :) I'm going to aim for… Wednesday for the next chapter? It may end up being Friday though, as I have a load of projects due and tests and stuff!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	23. Chapter 23

**Hey guys :) Hope you all are having a good week… The holidays are getting closer!**

**Thanks so much to all the people who reviewed the last chapter! Your reviews make me so happy :D : **Twisted Illusions, ArianaArmy, Glee Club Rock 1251, happygirl57, GhostGirlMD, amrice101, soozhearts, bubzchoc, CountryPeach05, jug, Channylover26, Anonymous Skrtle, SweetPeaKiller, TheWritingFreak, FreakierThanFreaks… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

James was just scrawling his name onto Carlos' cast when Camille hesitantly knocked on the door. "Can I come in?" Her head peered around the door, and she smiled hesitantly when she saw the two boys. "Hey, guys…"

"Camille!" Carlos exclaimed, and waved enthusiastically at her; despite the pain that James knew he had to be feeling. James' own chest twinged in sympathy as he watched his friend gestureCamille over, and James winced, knowing that his ribs were only cracked and Carlos' broken. He really had no idea how Carlos was able to just push all of his pain and suffering down for others.

She took a second to stare at Carlos' face, and both the boys' injuries, before composing herself quickly, and coming over. She encased James in a hug that was slightly too tight to be comfortable, but he didn't say anything, hugging her back.

"Thank God," He heard her mutter, and he definitely seconded that statement. Things could have been so much worse.

Then Camille turned to Carlos, and hugged him very gently, before digging around in her bag for something. Carlos' face lit up when she passed him his helmet, and he immediately put it on, already looking more like himself. Then Camille handed James a plastic bag full of Cuda hair products, and he beamed.

"This is from everyone at the Palm Woods," She said, taking out an oversized card with lots of handwritten messages inside. James opened it for a moment, glancing inside, and was shocked at the amount of people who had written short but meaningful messages. He hadn't even thought that there was that many people in the Palm Woods that knew their name.

Carlos was already pressing the button on his bed to raise himself into even more of an upright position, smiling and laughing with Camille as she sat down in a chair beside his bed. James sat down beside her, and let Camille question them both, glad that she was there.

Then, she was looking over at the mess that James had left his bed in, it was painful enough walking around, he wasn't about to start making his bed too. Camille rolled her eyes, and bustled over to the other side of the room, quickly making a start on making the bed, and tidying up the bedside table. James could have sworn that he heard her mutter in an affectionate tone, "Boys…"

They both watched silently and in a kind of amused stupor as Camille fussed around them, fluffing pillows and smoothing blankets, as smiles crept onto their faces. At one point, Camille turned around to say something, and found both Carlos and James staring at her with awe and relief in their eyes. "What?" She as ked, both hands on her hips.

"Nothing," Carlos replied, "It's just really great to see you, Camille." James nods in agreement, and Camille smiles, before proceeding to fold James' discarded hoodie and t-shirt into neat piles that were stowed away in the drawer of his bedside table.

James then began to wonder when Ms. Knight would be back. She had been stranded in Minnesota due to a storm that had closed all the airports, and had been without a phone for a day after the accident, so hadn't even heard about it until most of the initial drama was over. Just as James was wondering if he should pull Logan aside and quietly ask him about the situation, Carlos, who must have been thinking along the same lines, spoke up loudly, "When is Mama Knight going to come home?"

Camille looked to James as well for the answer, having finally stopped cleaning and fussing. He explained the situation as best as he could, giving as little details as he thought Carlos would allow, not wanting his friend to get upset that James had no idea when Kendall's mother would be back.

"Are… Are, um, your guys' parents coming out too?"

James froze at Camille's innocent question, and sneaked a look at Carlos. His friend had stiffened the second Camille had mentioned their parents, but he said in a voice that was full of forced cheerfulness. "Well, my parents have too much on, what with all my brothers and sisters and all their activities, and they wouldn't be able to get here until the same time as Ms. Knight, so they thought that there wasn't much point in wasting money on flights, seeing as I'm fine."

Carlos looked anything but fine, and James wished that he could somehow make things better, but he knew that the best thing to do for Carlos was to get Camille's attention off the topic, "My mom's in Europe, at an important meeting," He blurted out, glad when Camille looked at him with interest, "So, um, she's not coming either."

Camille now looked slightly wary as she went to ask the next question, knowing that she may end up making things a whole lot worse, but wanting to know the answer, "And Logan's parents?"

This time, Carlos had forced all sense of falseness from his tone, and started to talk again, though James knew that he was hiding hurt and upset inside him, "Logan begged them not to come, seeing as he'd only broken his arm, so they're going to come closer to the holidays instead, just to make sure that he's still okay then."

Their conversation continued after that without anymore talk of parents, as Camille and James could sense how upset Carlos was about the topic of his family.

Eventually, a nurse came in to give Carlos another IV injection of pain meds, as he was hours late for them, but still hadn't said a word. Carlos pouted and then scowled and then begged the nurse not to give them to him, "They make me feel weird," He said in a small voice, "And they make me go to sleep within like half an hour, and I don't even really need them!"

His protests were ignored though, and James gave him a reassuring smile as Carlos watched the liquid flow through the tubes into his arm. Then James had to force himself not to do exactly what Carlos had done when he looked up to see the nurse handing him two pills and a cup of water. In an attempt to make Carlos feel better, James downed the pills, though he frowned when he was ordered back to bed.

"Well, I guess that's my cue to go," Camille said, giving a yawning Carlos a gentle hug before rising out of her chair to hug James. "I'm going to go see what Logan and Kendall are up to, but I'll just be on the other end of the phone if either of you need me. See you, guys."

Both the friends said goodbye, and it wasn't long before Carlos was snoring, the helmet askew on his head. James was mustering up the strength to get up and take off Carlos' helmet so he'd be more comfortable when he woke up, but then he realised how tired he was, and it wasn't long after that until he too was asleep.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Logan woke up to the sound of someone tapping softly on the door. He went to roll over to the other side of his bed, but ended up crashing to the ground, forgetting that he had been curled up on a couple of hospital chairs.

"Logan!" Camille hissed worriedly, and hurried over to help him up. She gasped when she saw his cast, and he grinned at her as she looked at him with worry in her eyes. "Are you okay?"

He nodded, gesturing for her to take a seat on one of the chairs that he had been sleeping on two minutes previously. She did so, and then turned to look at Kendall, who was still sleeping. He didn't look as pale as he had when he had first woken up, but Kendall was still a mess, a pulse ox monitor on his finger, and wires protruding out from his hospital gown.

"Is Kendall okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, he's going to be fine. A bit weak and out of it for a while probably, but things are okay now." He looked up from where he had been studying his hands to give Camille a quick smile. "Any news at the Palm Woods?"

She shook her head, and then said hesitantly, "Is Mrs. Knight going to be back anytime soon, do you know? I was just with Carlos and James, and it seems like they kinda need her back…"

Logan chuckled slightly, and then glanced over at his phone that was on the bedside table. "I got a call from her a few hours ago, when Kendall was asleep and Carlos and James were in their room, and she said that she was still trying to get a flight back. The airport was about to open again, so she said that she'd call me when she was definitely getting on a plane. I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up until I knew for sure."

He shrugged, and ran a hand through his slightly spiky hair, sighing. Camille put a hand on his shoulder, and he dropped his head into his hands. She leaned over then, and pulled Logan into a hug, smiling as he didn't resist and rested his head on her shoulder.

"Thanks so much for coming, Camille," Logan's voice was muffled slightly, but Camille could still make it out, "It really means a lot to us that you're here."

"Anytime, Logan, anytime. I'm just sorry that I didn't know earlier."

They sat in silence for a while longer, until Logan's phone rang, and he jumped up to answer it. Camille waved goodbye at him, pointing to the door to say that she was leaving. He gave her a weary grin, and then answered the phone.

"Mrs. Knight…?"

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**So, I hope that chapter was okay :) I'm thinking maybe Saturday or Sunday for the next chapter…? Check it out then if you want :)**

**Review….?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	24. Chapter 24

**Hey guys :) Hope you all had a good weekend!**

**Thanks so much to the following for reviewing the last chapter! :**soozhearts, jug, Glee Club Rock 1251, bubzchoc, happygirl57, Anonymous Skrtle, MyHeroRaven, CountryPeach05, GhostGirlMD… **:D You guys are also great!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Carlos woke up to the sound of hushed laughing and someone _shush_ing the others. When he opened his eyes, he saw Kendall sitting in a wheelchair, though slightly slumped, beside his bed, grinning.

James was beside him, smiling at Logan who was going red in the face trying to keep his laughter silent. Carlos yawned loudly, and asked in a sleepy voice what exactly was going on. They all jumped a bit, and then looked at him happily, "My mom's on a flight home," Kendall told him, checking his watch, "And the nurse said that I can get out of bed for a while at last."

"That's great, Kendall! What time is Mama Knight gonna get here at?" Carlos sat up in his bed, and then looked longingly at the empty chair beside his bed for a moment. "Um, Logan…? Do you think that you and James could maybe help me get out of bed too, and just sit in that chair there?"

His friends hesitated for a few seconds, Logan and James exchanging unsure looks. Carlos added in a _'please?' _"Well, I guess it'll be okay, if we're careful," Logan eventually said, biting his lip for a moment, "Right, James you try and hold his casted leg steady, while I slide Carlos down and over onto the chair." Carlos watched as Kendall weakly reached over and pushed the chair that they were aiming towards closer to the bed.

"What do I have to do?"

"Carlos, you just stay still, and relax, okay?" He nodded, but winced when James went to lift his leg off the bed. "On the count of three. One, two, thr—"

The second that Logan had started to say three, James was lifting his leg, and Logan was holding him gently but firmly under his arms, and he was grunting loudly in pain. His leg was doing that painful throbbing thing again, his ribs were burning, and it felt like someone was taking a hammer to his head, but Carlos refused to let out any expression of pain apart from a grunt.

When he finally felt composed enough to open his eyes, he was in the chair, his leg propped up on the bed, and Logan and James were in his face. Logan was apologising profusely, and James was looking extremely guilty.

"'M fine," He managed to say, trying to crack a smile. It didn't work. "'M'okay, guys, really. S'okay… Seriously, guys, go sit down."

Kendall awkwardly patted Carlos on the shoulder as his other two friends shuffled back off to their seats. "So, when's Mrs. Knight going to get here?" Carlos needed to change the subject, and make Logan stop staring at him like he was about to burst into tears. He was _fine_.

"Huh? Oh, well, I talked to her a few hours ago, and she was going to come straight here, so maybe…" He checked his watch, "Half an hour? It depends what traffic's like, and stuff like that. But she'll be here soon."

Carlos beamed, and rubbed at his face gently, trying not to go too hard on the stitches, "That's awesome… But, wait!" All eyes turned to him as Carlos' eyes widened, "But when do we get to go home? I don't wanna leave Mama Knight and Katie all alone in 2J."

James chuckled for a moment at this, grinning at his friend's innocent question, "Well, me and Logan can go home whenever, just as long as we come back in a few days for a check up. You're probably good to go in another day or so, as long as you come back for check-ups for your ribs and leg, and… I honestly have no idea about Kendall."

They all laughed slightly, but it was true. None of them had ever been in a coma before the accident, or known anyone who'd come out of one. While it was only one that lasted for a day or two, they still had no idea what kind of steps or protocol they would have to follow.

While the conversation was focused on Kendall, James noticed that his friend was starting to sag slightly in the wheelchair, like he didn't have the energy to sit up straight. James nudged Logan discreetly, and the two exchanged a quick glance. They were getting good at those these days. "You okay, Kendall? 'Cause we can call for a nurse if you want…?"

Kendall shook his head, determined not to give up his freedom for bed rest again. He had just gotten down to James and Carlos' room, and he didn't want to leave so soon. Logan looked between a stubborn looking Kendall, and Carlos' bed, and then back at James again.

"Hey, Carlos, you going to get back into bed anytime soon?" Logan asked nonchalantly.

Carlos went pale, and he shook his head quickly, "No way, man. There's no way that I'm getting back into bed until the last possible second that I completely and utterly have to, you hear me?"

James caught onto Logan's plan, and followed his lead, "Yeah, Carlos, we hear you. So, then Kendall, you could get into Carlos' bed, just until you get your energy back." Kendall didn't look amused. "Well, it's either that, or you have to go back to your own room."

He hesitated for a moment. "Fine."

Only a few minutes later, Logan and James were transferring their friend carefully from the wheelchair to Carlos' bed, while Carlos looked on nervously. There was nothing to worry about though, as the only place that Kendall had been injured was his head, and the lift didn't hurt him at all. Kendall did wear an annoyed expression on his face the whole time though, but it was obvious that he was more comfortable in the bed, as he seemed to sink into it.

"Thanks for lending me your bed, Carlos."

Carlos smiled at his friend, who still looked a bit put out, "No problem. It's like a sleepover now! Well, kinda. Whatever."

A nurse barged though the door a few minutes later, causing all four teenagers to freeze and stare at her. Carlos looked confused, James looked territorial, Kendall looked _really_ pissed off, and Logan looked exasperated. "I— Um, your mother is here to see you all…?" She said hesitantly, and all the stares were wiped off their faces.

"Mrs Knight!"

"Mama Knight!"

"Mom!"

"Mama Knight!"

They all yelled out at the same time, and the nurse was pushed out of the way as Jennifer Knight came running through the door, dropping her bags on the floor. "My boys!"

She rushed over, and reached James first, wrapping her arms around him for a brief seconds, before moving onto Logan. He too was pulled into a bone crushing hug from Mrs. Knight, his casted arm flailing around in surprise for a moment. Then Kendall's mom was rushing up to Kendall, and she was crying and smoothing down his hair, and shaking her head at the bruise on his forehead.

"Oh, thank God you're all okay," She said in a shaky voice as she gave Kendall a careful hug, before moving to Carlos, and leaning down so that he could wrap his arms around her neck, and hug her tighter than what was comfortable for him. Mrs. Knight was then raising her eyebrows in falsely disguised shock at the cuts on Carlos' face, and he was hugging her again, telling her in a cheerful voice that they would heal, and that his face would look better soon, he promised.

She then went around all four boys again, this time examining their injuries, and hugging them again, before she was worn out. Kendall watched his mom sit down in a chair beside Carlos, Logan and James opposite her, and held her hand in his.

"I'm glad that you're back, mom," He said to her, and she leaned over to give him a one-armed hug.

"I'm sorry that I wasn't here sooner, honey, I'm so sorry." She said back, tears filling her eyes once again. "I am so so so sorry, and I can't believe that all this happened. I should have gotten a new phone the second my old one broke, and I just can't believe that— that you four were all alone in the hospital for so long. I'm sorry."

Carlos leaned in to hug Mrs. Knight again, and Kendall rubbed her back. "Its okay, Mrs. Knight," Logan said comfortingly, "You didn't know. It's not your fault, and we're all okay now, so everything's good."

Then Mrs. Knight was forced to leave because of the mounds of paperwork that was waiting for her, but she hugged all of the friends once again, and promised to be back within the hour. And then the four boys were alone again, reeling slightly from the excitement and relief that came from having Mrs. Knight back again. Things were starting to get better gradually.

"Man, I missed my mom."

"Me too." Carlos said, and Logan and James agreed wholeheartedly.

It wouldn't be long before things were back to the way that they used to be.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**I hope that that chapter was okay :) I'll try to get the next one up between Wednesday—Friday, so check it out then if you want!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	25. Chapter 25

**Hey guys :) First off, I am so sorry that I'm so late posting this, but I do have an excuse! I was stuck in hospital for the last five days 'cause I hurt my back but I'm just home now, and furiously typing! I nearly cried when I found out there was no Wi-Fi in the hospital but it's all good now :)**

**Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! : **happygirl57, Glee Club Rock 1251, GhostGirlMD, Anonymous Skrtle, Channylover26, MyHeroRaven, jug, SweetPeaKiller, bubzchoc, FreakierThanFreaks, TheWritingFreak, CountryPeach05, Angsty Clockwork, ArianaArmy, FanfictionRulesMyLife… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

Logan rubbed his forehead tiredly as he stared out of the moving car's window. He recognised all the buildings and streets that they passed, and the familiarity was comforting. He winced and shrank back though when he saw a large SUV approach the car, paling when he remembered how Carlos had cut up his face, just from the simple act of pressing his head against the window.

James, who was sitting next to him, noticed it, and looked out to see the SUV too. Logan felt his friend tense up beside him, and breathed a sigh of relief when the car indicated left and was soon gone from sight. It didn't stop the shivers that ran down his spine though.

The radio was on, and playing some song that Logan didn't know, but was apparently a recent release. Mrs. Knight was silent in the front of the car, and it didn't escape Logan's attention that she kept sneaking glances back at them in the mirror.

He knew that it was stupid, but Logan was just as tense as James, if not more. He was forcing himself to breathe normally, but his arm was aching inside the cast, and it was almost impossible to not wrench the door open and jump out. Everytime another car approached them from a different direction; Logan would either shut his eyes or look the other way and try not to have a panic attack.

Logan just wanted _out_ of the car.

Finally they pulled up to the Palm Woods, and he and James were out of the car within seconds. Then they were pale and shaking on the pavement, and half of the Pam Woods residents were staring at them. Mrs. Knight got out slowly, and stood with her back to the group of their friends, her eyes only on Logan and James.

"We're fine, Mrs. Knight," Logan blurted out quickly, seeing James nod in agreement out of the corner of his eye. "It was just… hot in the car. We needed some air. But we're totally fine now."

It was obvious from her expression that Kendall's mom didn't buy Logan's lame excuse, but she didn't press the matter, and stepped back to let Katie run out from the crowd, and enclose them both in a hug. Then the rest of the people started to hesitantly come forward, and Logan soon found himself right in the middle of a dozen hugs, with people asking him how he was every two seconds.

James smiled at him from over Camille's head, and hugged Tyler, and Logan could see that James was feeling better already. Then Guitar Dude asked where Kendall and Carlos were, and Logan felt a small bit of his good mood evaporate, "Oh, they, um, they're still at the hospital. But they'll both be home in a few days, and they've got each other in there." Logan let out a nervous laugh, and was thankful when James took over.

"Yeah, and we only came home to shower, eat, and change, so we're heading back out to the hospital in like an hour or whatever."

"Well, you boys can try and catch a few hours of sleep in your own beds before we go back to the hospital," Mrs. Knight cut in with a motherly smile, "Carlos and Kendall will be fine without you for a few hours. And you're both looking exhausted, so let's get you two up to the apartment."

Logan and James both groaned in unison, "But Mama Knight…."

"No buts!"

Their friends all laughed in sympathy, and even more hugs were exchanged before Logan and James reluctantly trudged back to their apartment. While neither of them would probably admit it, it did feel really good to be alone in peace and quiet in 2J. Mrs. Knight bustled around, making them both sandwiches, while Katie had stayed down at the pool, to give them both space.

Not even thinking about eating or showering, Logan and James simply walked into one of the bedrooms as if on autopilot, and both lay down on the beds. They were asleep within seconds, Logan curled up on his bed, and James sprawled out on Kendall's.

Mrs. Knight, not hearing a response to a question that she had just asked, crept into the room, and smiled upon seeing the two boys fast asleep. She hurried into the sitting room, and got two thick blankets, laying one over Logan and then turning to a sleeping James and doing the same.

Then she went back out to the kitchen, sat down at the table, and cried with relief.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Kendall laughed loudly at Carlos' joke, drawing the attention of a nurse from the hallway at the sound of his laugh. "You boys okay in here?" She opened the door, and looked in to see Carlos grinning smugly and Kendall red in the face.

"Oh, we're fine," Carlos snickered, "But do you want to hear the worst joke ever?" She nodded with a slight smile gracing her features, and Carlos continued to tell the joke again, "What's a frog's favourite drink…? _Croaka_ cola!"

He watched Carlos' face light up when the nurse got the joke and started laughing with him, and wondered for the millionth time just how Carlos did it. Time after time Kendall had watched his friend take a completely sombre or not hopeful occasion, and turn it around with a full blown grin and a terrible joke. It worked every time, and Carlos could always make a bad situation better.

It was just something that he did.

After listening to a few more awful jokes, the nurse finally said that she had to leave, and she promised to bring them back chocolate pudding from the cafeteria later. Having Carlos around was _defiantly_ a good thing if he could score them both free chocolate pudding.

Kendall stifled a yawn and tried his best to stretch out nonchalantly for the third time. He had taken James' bed in Carlos' room, because he was a lot better now, and he had refused to go back to his old room... And because Carlos had looked crushed at the thought of being alone in the hospital room with Logan and James going home.

Not that Logan and James had gone back to the Palm Woods willingly. It had taken half an hour of persuasion on Mrs. Knight's part to even get them to consider the idea. Then James had caught sight of his hair in a mirror, and he'd suddenly been that bit less reluctant to leave.

Logan, not one for being able to stand his ground alone for long had then rolled eyes and fussed over Carlos and Kendall, and then left with Mrs Knight.

With any luck, Carlos would be good to go within the next day or two. As mug as his friend insisted that he was fine, Kendall knew that the doctors were still keeping an eye on his broken ribs, and besides, Carlos wasn't going far on that leg.

He hoped that he'd be allowed home soon too. Kendall still got tired very quickly, but he was getting gradually stronger since the moment that he had woken up. And it wasn't too bad, he realized, being this useless in front of Carlos.

His friend had started to almost coach him in a way, encouraging Kendall to keep going even when he was exhausted so that he could stay awake and build up his stamina in a way. ("C'mon, man, just stay awake for ten more minutes, that's it just keep your eyes open... Now try and pick up that glass of water with one hand...That's it, Kendall, you're doing great! Just one more minute now— okay you can go to sleep... See you when you wake up.")

That combined with all the encouragement that Logan and James were giving him, he felt much better already. Carlos had read the whole card of messages out to Kendall when they had both woken up that afternoon - Carlos was still fatigued, but Kendall knew that he also just loved being able to fall asleep whenever he wanted and not get in trouble.

Kendall had been completely overwhelmed by the things that people at the Palm Woods had written. For one thing, the card in itself was just less than three foot tall, and every inch of space had been written on. Some of the people that they hadn't know that well had simply gone for the whole 'Get well soon!' message, accompanied by smiley faces and stuff like that, but most who had signed the card had put real time and effort into signing it.

Guitar Dude had seemingly absentmindedly drawn music notes all around his section of the card, and Kendall was 90% sure that scribbled music notes on the back of the card were the opening bars of their song, Halfway There. The Jennifers had each written a small get well soon message, that were all made out to Carlos. They had included a joint message between the three of them that was for all four boys as well, but Kendall could tell that Carlos was most pleased with his own personal ones.

Even Bitters had signed his name, though Kendall could picture the slightly annoyed look on his face.

Then, still in the middle of thinking about the card, Kendall found his eyes shutting, and it was just too hard a struggle to keep himself awake. In a last ditch attempt to stay awake, Kendall looked over at Carlos, who just grinned at him, "Its fine, man, go to sleep. You stayed up for all of this morning which is the longest yet, so go for it. I'll be here pretending that the stupid TV in the corner works until you wake up."

Kendall smiled slightly before he let himself relax; Carlos had been moaning about the broken TV since the moment that Kendall had started sharing a room with him.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Carlos drummed his fingers on his cast and tried to convince himself that he wasn't bored out of his mind. It didn't work.

He was bored, and not tired at all, and hungry for chocolate, and wished the TV worked, and wanted company that wasn't a snoring Kendall, and he was really much more bored than he thought he'd ever been in his whole entire life. _Is it possible for someone to die from boredom?_, he wondered, and looked back over at his friend, rolling his eyes impatiently.

Kendall had only just gone to sleep, so that meant that he'd be out like a light for at least an hour. Stupid coma that still made Kendall tired even though he was out of it. Logan had explained to him once why Kendall was still so tired, but Carlos hadn't really been listening. There had been a really cute nurse outside the window, and Logan had a tendency to ramble on when he was explaining things.

Carlos groaned aloud in frustration, wishing that someone would just come in already so he'd have someone to talk to. And he could even convince whoever it was to go but him some chocolate from the vending machine that was down the hall.

Then Carlos' eyes landed on the crumbled heap of bills and coins that Logan had taken out of his pocket and left beside Carlos _'for emergencies only_,' and he smiled. A quickly glance to his right confirmed that the wheelchair that had been beside his bed was still there, and Carlos leaned forward to pull the chair towards himself.

He was bored almost to tears from just lying in his bed all day, and it was high time that he went out and started doing something productive. Like buying himself and Kendall as many bars of chocolate that he could.

When he was certain that he was going to go through with it, Carlos moved as close to the edge of the bed as he could. Then, thinking back to the last times that he had been helped into the chair, he tried to come up with the most painless way of doing it by himself. With one hand on the furthest armrest of the wheelchair and the other bracing himself on the bed, Carlos lifted himself slightly so that he was off the bed, and then let himself drop into the wheelchair.

He slammed into the chair, his casted leg bouncing off the floor as he didn't have enough strength to hold it up, and Carlos had to bite his lip hard to stop himself from making any noise. The pain subsided after only a few minutes, and Carlos found himself grinning in spite of the situation, clearly he was getting better if it didn't hurt as much as it had before.

Carlos pulled up the hood of James' hoodie that he had borrowed over his head, and looked over to check that Kendall was still fast asleep. Satisfied that his friend wouldn't be waking up anytime soon, he gripped the wheels of the wheelchair and started to push himself over to the door.

It was tiring and painful for his ribs, but Carlos made it out into the corridor out of pure determination and a craving for sugar.

The vending machine seemed further than he remembered, but he reached it eventually, ducking his head low whenever a doctor or nurse passed him by. He had come too far to be sent back to his room without chocolate. When he got to the machine, he smacked his hand off his forehead when he realised that the buttons were too high up for him to reach while still sitting in the wheelchair, cursing his bad luck.

But he had a plan. He decided what chocolate he wanted while sitting in the chair and counted out the change in coins that he would need, before reaching his arms out and gripping the machine tightly and standing up.

Carlos balanced on one leg in front of the machine, wobbling dangerously, but managed to fit the coins into the slot and press the appropriate buttons, before collapsing back into the wheelchair, breathing heavily. He reached down and grabbed the chocolate out, beaming with excitement at it, before shakily standing and repeating the whole process again.

He had gathered up quite a stash of chocolate in the hoodie pocket before he felt a hand on his shoulder, and he jumped. His balance, which was already unsteady, disappeared altogether, and he spun around as he fell, all the chocolate bars spilling out of his pocket and onto the floor. Carlos grabbed desperately onto the person as he fell, in an attempt to stay standing, but they both ended up crashing to the ground in a tangle of limbs and chocolate bars.

"What the hell are you _doing_, Carlos?"

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**Hopefully that extra long chapter made up for the long wait! I hope that you guys liked it :) I'm hoping to get the next chapter up before Christmas :) So keep an eye out! And to answer **TheWritingFreak**'s question, yeah, I think that this story is coming to an end! Probably only a few chapters left… Which makes me sad 'cause I've really liked writing this!**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	26. Chapter 26

**Hey guys! Tomorrow is Christmas Eve :) I hope that everyone who celebrates it has a great weekend!**

**Thanks so much for the people who reviewed the last chapter :) You guys are amazing! : **Glee Club Rock 1251, GhostGirlMD, bubzchoc, Channylover26, CountryPeach05, SweetPeaKiller, taffy, ArianaArmy, happygirl57, FreakierThanFreaks, TheWritingFreak… **:D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

"Who the hell are you?" Carlos asked good-naturedly while he rolled his body onto his front, and pushed himself into a sitting position, his broken leg stretched out in front of him, and his back leaning against the vending machine. His leg twinged in pain, but he pushed it down, and focused on the stranger in front of him, who he'd just pulled down to the ground by accident.

The man opposite him in a white coat was similarly getting himself into a sitting position, rubbing his head from where he had smacked it off the side of the wheelchair when they'd fallen. He frowned at Carlos, and looked pretty pissed off, "I'm assuming that you are Carlos Garcia then? And what is going on with all this chocolate?"

"Sir, yes, sir!" Carlos shouted, and gave the man a mock salute. He did not look impressed at Carlos' actions though, which made Carlos wince slightly on the inside. "Or… not." Carlos seemed to look around for the first time then and noticed just how many chocolate bars were on the floor. "Oh. Maybe I went a little overboard… But I had nothing else to do, mister, and I was hungry!"

They both sat in silence for a few moments, Carlos grinning slightly at the abundance of chocolate that they now both owned.

The doctor fumed silently for a few more seconds, looking like he'd love to burst into a lecture or start giving out to Carlos, but he seemed to get control of himself, while Carlos started to reach out and quietly stuff the chocolate bars into his pockets. The doctor still looked angry as he called for an orderly to help Carlos back into the wheelchair, but at least Carlos was pretty sure that they'd past the I'm-about-to-explode-with-angry-and-eat-your-face-off stage.

The guy who came paused for a moment as he took in the scene, and he opened his mouth to say something, possibly about the dozens of chocolate bars littering the floor, and then shook his head slightly before continuing to make his way to a sheepish looking Carlos. He then lifted Carlos silently, using a much more efficient and mostly painless method that Carlos hadn't even dreamed of trying.

The orderly then wheeled Carlos back to their room, the doctor watching his every move.

Kendall seemed to be waking up when Carlos came back into their room, rubbing a hand over his eyes when he looked up to see Carlos looking at the floor with a sulky face. "What have you done now, man…?" Kendall groaned, and pushed himself into a sitting position, yawning loudly as he ran a hand through his hair in an attempt to wake himself up.

Carlos only looked up and shrugged, though he ruined his façade of innocence by winking at Kendall and trying to slyly throw him a chocolate bar. Kendall rolled his eyes as the bar missed the bed and went sailing into the other corner of the room with a thud, making the doctor sigh loudly and look even wearier.

Once Carlos was back settled in the room, the doctor that neither of them recognised flipped through their charts, while they both squirmed under the weight of the silence. "So... Who exactly are you then?"

"I'm your new doctor," He replied in response to Kendall's question, "But hopefully for not too long— I think the hospital could do with a break from all four of you, before you break something important." He looked up then, a hint of laughter in his eyes, and that was all that it took to start Carlos snorting quietly with laughter. Kendall glared at him, but once Carlos started laughing, it was nearly impossible for him to stop.

The doctor took one look at Carlos, rolled his eyes, and put their charts back. "Well, fingers crossed that I'll be able to kick you two out as soon as tomorrow." And then with that, he marched out of the room, not looking back even once.

"I kinda like the guy."

Kendall raised his eyebrows at Carlos' random statement, and threw a pillow at him with a smile. "I'll be his best friend if he lets us out of here tomorrow. Seriously, I'm going crazy in here. I'll crack if we're stuck in here for any longer than tomorrow."

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Logan woke up to the sound of James spraying out hairspray while he bobbed his head along to their song_, If I Ruled The World_. James smiled at him when he saw Logan sit up in the mirror behind him, and Logan tentatively grinned back.

"What's got you so happy?" He asked, rubbing his hand on his cast, feeling more tired than he had when he'd fallen asleep.

Logan coughed slightly as the hairspray fumes made his way over to him, while James breathed in deeply, mocking Logan. "What's there not to be happy about? We're out of the hospital, Carlos and Kendall are nearly out of the hospital, and my hair finally looks great again." He made those motions with his hands that Logan had seen many times before, his fingers fluttering down in front of his face as he beamed.

"Yeah, I guess, I just… I feel like… like I need to see the car." James raised his eyebrows, his smile fading. "Yeah, _the_ car. The one that we were in when… I don't know. I can't even explain it." Logan faltered in his sentence as James frowned slightly at him. "It was stupid… I— Just forget about it."

There was silence for a few minutes as James turned off the music and stared at his friend, who immediately ducked his head down.

"I don't think that it's a stupid idea. Well, yeah, I'm going to admit that it kinda maybe scares the crap out of me, but I don't think that it's stupid. I just wanna know why? Why now, and why do you feel the need to?" He moved from where he had been standing in front of the window to sit down on the bed beside Logan, and looked at the floor with his friend. "Just help me to understand."

Logan shrugged, still staring at the ground, and said softly, "I don't think that it's going to be over until I can see it. When we got in the car this morning, to come home, it was like I couldn't breathe. I was back in the car on that day, and I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe, and I couldn't think, and I could barely keep it together, and I— I don't know how I'm going to get back in the car again to go the hospital. I keep reliving it over and over again, and maybe if I see the car, then it'll feel _real_. It'll feel real and it'll feel over. I just want this whole thing to be over."

"Okay. I still don't really get it, but I understand where you're coming from with this. I think it's a good idea. I know where the car is, they took it to a kinda repair shop place on the outskirts of town, and I think that they're waiting for us to come and claim it again. But, I do think that if we're going to do this, that we should do it together. Me, you, Kendall, and Carlos."

James watched out of the corner of his eye as Logan nodded, and rubbed a hand over his face, taking a deep breath."Thanks, James. I think that it's just something that I need to do."

"No problem, man. We can go see the car tomorrow evening if Carlos and Kendall are good to go from the hospital, okay?"

"Yeah, okay. Thanks."

No other words were exchanged between the two friends as Logan pulled on a hoodie and they both made their way into the kitchen, feeling exhausted. Kendall's mother was sitting at the table, chatting to one of her friends on the laptop, using the video streaming system that Carlos' mother had set up last time she had visited.

She went to say goodbye to her friend, but James ushered her not to, saying that they were fine, and for Mrs. Knight to keep talking. She smiled and nodded, pointing over to the counter where there were mounds of sandwiches stacked up on a plate.

Logan picked up the plate with a bemused grin, knowing that they had no hope of finishing all the sandwiches without Carlos there. James was already sitting on the couch by the time Logan got over to him, and he reached out for a sandwich, shoving it all into his mouth at once. "James, that's disgusting. Ugh, I honestly don't know how you can just shove all that food into your mouth at once!"

Logan broke the silence by exclaiming his disgust at his friend's eating habits, James only grinning back at him, cheeks bulging with food. Carlos was normally right there beside him eating the same gross way though, and James suddenly thought of his friend.

"You wanna take these to go and head back to the hospital too?" James nodded furiously in response to Logan's question, and swallowed loudly.

Within minutes, Logan had transferred the sandwiches from to plate to a lunchbox and was packing it into a bag, along with clothes for their two other friends in anticipation of when they'd be released from the hospital. James ran into his room to grab something and scribbled down their plans on a scrap of paper and passed it to Mrs. Knight, who was still video-chatting, and then the two friends slipped out of the apartment.

Instead of heading for the car park though, James started walking towards the Palm Woods Park, with Logan trailing along behind him. "Why are we going this way, James? Mrs. Knight's car is that way…?"

His friend didn't answer though, just kept walking with a determined look on his face. They walked right through the park, and kept going until they reached a bike rental shop a couple of blocks away. "James?"

"Two bikes for the day, please." James produced a wad of cash from his pocket, that Logan was pretty sure had come from the James' box of savings in his room, and paid the guy behind the counter. They were handed a helmet each, and then suddenly a confused Logan was wheeling a bike out of the shop. James swung himself into the saddle, and started to pedal down the street.

Logan followed his example, and looked at his friend with curiosity as he cycled beside him. "What's all this for, man? You just spent half your savings on two over-priced bikes for the day."

James just looked at him, "You said that you hated being in cars. So, we're not in a car, and you're okay. It's fine; I would have spent the money on something stupid that I wouldn't have needed anyway. At least this way, we're both good."

"I—" Logan opened his mouth to say something, but couldn't find the words. So he didn't say anything, and just let his smile speak for him, as they cycled beside each other in the sunshine.

"Things are almost better, Logan. And I'm going to make sure that everything will keep going that way."

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

**I hope that you guys liked that :) And a special thanks to **ArianaArmy **who gave me the idea for the car thing! I hope you don't mind if I use it in the next chapter too…? :)**

**I'll try and get the next chapter up on Monday or Tuesday, so check it out then if you want! I hope everyone has a great Christmas :)**

**Review…?**

**Thanks for reading, **

**ArmedWithMyComputer xx**


	27. Chapter 27

**Hey guys :) I am really sad to say that this is the last chapter! I'll say more at the end about future stories and stuff, but just to drop a bombshell on you when you weren't expecting it… Sorry!**

**Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter :) Your reviews are **_**much**_** appreciated: **ArianaArmy, Channylover26, bubzchoc, GhostGirlMD, NattieGirl99, SweetPeaKiller, Glee Club Rock 1251, Twisted Illusions, CountryPeach05, happygirl57, FreakierThanFreaks, Anonymous Skrtle…** :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush. Sorry for any mistakes!**

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

"Start spreading the news… I'm leaving today… We are a great big part of it—" Carlos halted in his loud singing, and frowned, not knowing how to continue the song.

James rolled his eyes at his friend, "You totally got that from that movie _Madagascar_, the one with the talking animals and stuff." At this, Kendall looked up from where he was shoving what little clothes that he had in the hospital into a bag, and grinned.

"Oh, I remember that movie… And Katie rented it out, but Carlos totally ended up making us watch it with him, and—"

"Guys! It's not important how I heard the song," Carlos gestured wildly with his hands, "The important thing is that we're going home today!" He high fived Kendall enthusiastically, and threw a shoe at James who was packing his bag. "Hurry up, man!" James pouted at Carlos, rubbing his head dramatically, but packed the lone shoe nonetheless.

Logan burst through the door to their room then, pushing a wheelchair with a smile, saying "Let's blow this popsicle stand, guys. Mrs. Knight is just signing the papers and then you two are free to go!" Kendall and Carlos beamed at this, and Carlos started to hastily shove his non casted foot into the matching shoe to the one that he had thrown at James a few seconds ago.

His friend wheeled the chair over to Carlos, locked it, and then waited for Carlos to tie his laces in a sloppy bow. "Ready, buddy?" James moved to help Logan, and then each of the put a hand around Carlos' arm, and helped him to stand, then turned him slightly, before he plopped down into the waiting wheelchair.

There was silence for a few seconds, and then Carlos let out the breath that he had been holding, and smiled. "I'm good, guys, thanks for helping me. Let's just _leave_ already now."

Carlos grabbed the pair of crutches that he had been given twenty minutes ago from where they had been propped up against his bed, and settled them in his lap. "Onwards, Logan!"

The brunette complied with a chuckle, just glad that Carlos wasn't making a fuss about not being able to walk out of the hospital by himself. All three friends had been holding their breaths nervously when Logan had walked in with the wheelchair, but luckily Carlos had decided that this was just one battle that he couldn't win, and hadn't even said a word about it.

"You guys go on ahead," James said, seeing Carlos' anxiety to get out of the room. "Me and Kendall will hang back for a minute, and make sure that we haven't missed anything."

Logan pushed Carlos into the hallway, his friend chattering away the whole time, talking about everything from what movie he wanted to see in the cinema to what they were having for dinner that night. Logan took it all in his stride, nodding and saying '_yes_,' in all the right places. He was just relieved that everything was finally getting back to normal.

But Logan was also nervous about what they were going to do after they left the hospital.

Carlos and Kendall had agreed to go with James and Logan to see the car, the one that had sent everything into a downward spiral. Something in Logan's eyes, which had been glued to the floor while James had been explaining the situation, had made them realise how important this was to their friend.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

The car was silent once again as Mrs. Knight pulled out of the hospital car park, and headed towards the other side of town, with all four boys crammed into the car.

Carlos was sitting in the front passenger seat; his seat pushed as far back as it could go as he couldn't bend his leg because of the cast. Logan was crammed in behind him, his legs pulled right up to his chest, slightly disgruntled at the fact that Kendall and James had quickly pushed Logan into the car first to avoid sitting behind a laughing Carlos.

"Sorry, Logan," Carlos said once again with a smile that he tried to fight back, as he craned his head around to look at his friend who frowned slightly, before softening.

"Its fine, man. No problem."

His voice was tense though and it was obvious to anyone that knew Logan that he was about as close to a freak out as he could get. If anyone who knew any of the boys well had looked into the car, they would have seen the signs of fear on all four boys.

Carlos was trying his best to keep a smile plastered on his face, but his fists were clenched inside his pockets, and every so often he would slip and a sliver of anxiety would be visible. James was drumming his fingers on his knee, his eyes darting around the car, as if he was feeling trapped and scared. It would have been easy to assume that Kendall was asleep, with his head resting on the window of the car, and his eyes closed, his breathing heavy. But he was really just pretending to rest, listening to every sound that was made and the rumble of the engine of the car, his too stiff body giving him away.

Traffic was practically non existent as they drove towards the car repair shop, so it only took ten minutes to get to the place. Mrs. Knight took the keys out of the ignition, and waited, not saying anything.

"Oh, um, I guess we'll go in then… Can you wait out here, mom?" Kendall said, his voice only cracking at the end of his sentence. His mother looked around with a sad smile and nodded, saying that they could take all the time that they needed. "Thanks," Kendall got out of the car first, and headed straight to the boot of the car, to get Carlos' crutches.

Carlos' door was already open when Kendall got to it, and he silently handed his friend the crutches, and then offered him a hand to help him to his feet. Carlos refused the help though, and stood shakily, starting to hop towards Logan and James who were waiting for them halfway to the wire link fence.

Kendall followed close behind him, afraid that his friend would lose focus for a second, and end up crashing to the ground.

Carlos moved slowly but carefully though, and they made it to James and Logan without either of them falling or freaking out. "You guys ready?" James asked tensely, nodding slightly when he saw his friends nod together. "Let's do this then."

They walked towards the fence together slowly, Carlos limping painfully along, and the others walking wearily beside him. They pushed the door in the fence open, and made their way inside the yard, trying not to look at all the wrecks of cars that had been ruined from various accidents like theirs. Everything just seemed to hit too close to home.

A tired looking old man came out of the barn that they were approaching, and greeted them, ushering them in when they said who they were. "Oh, yes, you're the boy on the phone. Yes, your car is just down here…" When they reached the broken shell of the vehicle, all the boys froze and stared, "Well, I'll leave you boys to it."

He then lumbered away to work on another car, not giving the friends a second glance. They didn't give him a second glance either, too fixated on the car in front of them to think about anything else.

Logan stepped forward first, reaching out his hand to touch the car door on the side that hadn't been hit, but he dropped his hand down like he'd been burned once he got within two centimetres. Carlos wandered around the other side of the car, the side that he and Logan had been sitting on, and his face went pale when he saw the damage done.

"Holy shit."

All his friends looked up at him from where they had been focusing on different parts of the car, knowing that Carlos normally never swore, and seeing the pasty colour that had appeared on his face.

James reached him first, and he put a hand on Carlos' elbow discreetly to ensure that his friend stayed upright before he even glanced at the car. When he did though, he felt his knees go weak at the sight of it, and he looked desperately up at Logan and Kendall.

They hurried over and then all four friends simply stood in silence, staring at the car that had ruined their lives in such a short space of time.

There was a huge dent in the back side of the car, where Carlos had been sitting, and there was dried blood and shattered glass all over the backseat on Carlos' side. When they looked in even close, it was easy to see where Kendall's seatbelt had been half ripped out, as Kendall had struggled to free himself with such panic and strength.

Logan's door was only partially caved in, and he could almost feel his broken arm start throbbing as he stared at the car, flashes of screaming and pain bursting into his mind.

The only part of the car that wasn't touched was James' door and he cringed slightly when his eyes landed on the seat. "This is weird," He said finally, and twitched slightly as if was going to step forward but was too afraid. Carlos shifted away from his friend to balance by himself, showing James that he could go over to the car if he wanted.

After a few more seconds, James did step forward, and he traced the dent in the car door where it had caved inwards and broke Logan's arm, before reaching into the broken shell of the car. He pressed the eject button on the cd opening, and a cd came gliding out, much to everyone's surprise. "I was looking for this," he muttered quietly, before stepping back to stand in line with his friends, slipping the disk into his pocket.

It all became too much for Carlos to take when he shuffled a few awkward hops to put his hand through the empty window in the back, feeling his hand pass through the empty air where the glass that had cut up his face had once been. He looked inside at his seat briefly, seeing the pool of dried blood on the leather, and then turned away, his face expressionless. He didn't stop when he reached his friends, but instead kept walking until he had reached the door of the barn that had been converted into a workshop.

"I'll be outside. Need some air."

James looked worriedly after him, and then back to Logan, who was frozen in place. "I'll, um, go see if Carlos is okay…" He hurried off to where Carlos had disappeared from sight, and then it was just Kendall and Logan left.

Kendall kept quiet for a few more minutes, but then he looked sideways at his friend, and said, "Do you want me to go for a minute, Logan? Or do you want me to stay here with you until you're ready?" Logan started at his words, and then shook his head quickly, still not looking at his friend.

Trying to think of what he was supposed to do in this kind of situation, Kendall settled with putting an arm around Logan's shoulder, frowning when he realised that his friend was shaking softly. He couldn't even think of anything else to say, unsure of how Logan would react to anything, so they just stood there for a few more minutes, Kendall's arm slung around his friend.

"Is it over now, Kendall," Logan finally spoke, his gaze directed at the car. "Are things going to start to get better now? Please tell me that things are going to get better." He was nearly begging him, and it broke Kendall's heart.

"Yeah. Yeah, things are going to start looking up for us, Logan. It might take a while, and it might stay horrible for awhile, but as long as we stick together, we'll get through this. We've already gone through the hard part, and now it's just a matter of time until we burst out of the clouds and into the sunshine."

Logan nodded, and Kendall could feel the shaking slow until it was gone. He could see Carlos and James' silhouettes in the doorway, their backs to Logan and Kendall, looking out into the sunshine. "C'mon, let's go out to the others. Let's walk out that door, and do the best that we can to put all of this crap behind us, and start living our lives again."

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Mrs. Knight looked out from where she was still sitting in the car to see the four boys walking back. Where they had left the car as four broken and scared boys, they were returning as four best friends, who were ready to put the past behind them, and move on.

It was almost as if she could see the bond that held them together, but the way Kendall had his arm casually around Logan's shoulder, the way that James was keeping a careful look out for stones that could send Carlos sprawling and kicking them out of the way before he could notice, the way that they all seemed to slot into place as they talked in low voices, the way that they just looked so complete already with just the four of them.

Sure, it would take some time for the scars to heal, both mental and physical, but that wasn't the main part anymore. They had overcome this horrific scenario, and come out of it stronger and more connected.

The boys were back.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o

***sob* Well, that's it for this story! I just want to say that I've had an amazing time writing this, and thanks so much for all the feedback, alerts, and favourites. I love taking requests for stories, so don't be afraid to hit me with whatever story you want to see on the site next :) Leave requests or anything in reviews or PM me either :)**

**I do have a BTR story planned, have yet to actually start writing it though (!), so I'll try and post that after I get back from Australia (random holiday!) which would be late January.**

**Thanks so much again for everyone who read this, even if you didn't review :)**

**Review…?**

**Thanks so so so much for reading,**

**ArmedWithMyComputer xxx**


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